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Featured Replies


Yeah, I know how you feel. I had a coyote run in front of my car on my way home last night. Scared the shit out me.
I hope you posted that on Nextdoor to warn your neighbors.
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  • mooseoutfront
    mooseoutfront

    After posting some in the non-Texas Winter weather thread, I had some requests to start my own thread about my life in Alaska.   The backstory...My wife and I have lived completely off the g

  • mooseoutfront
    mooseoutfront

    Yesterday started off so nice.  The Lights were out on my way to work.

  • mooseoutfront
    mooseoutfront

    Hard no  

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12 minutes ago, You don't know me said:
1 hour ago, Hate said:

Yeah, I know how you feel. I had a coyote run in front of my car on my way home last night. Scared the shit out me.

I hope you posted that on Nextdoor to warn your neighbors.

He said coyote - not black guy. 

Thanks for your concern, but the streets of The Woodlands have hardened me.  Within the last year, I have had to melt snow to flush the toilet and do the dishes and survived..neigh, thwarted a possible attack on my car by a clearly deranged coyote.  I didn't even have my gun on me either.  I think I could hang out with mooseoutfront.  I'd definitely be a better neighbor. 

Edited by Hate

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2 hours ago, Not a cat said:

I read somewhere that wherever there are wolves there typically aren't coyotes because wolves take them out pretty quickly.  It appears I don't know shit.

The wolves are encroaching. The coyotes have the flats, where I live. There are 2 packs of wolves that live along along a ridge line a mile from my front door. A Northern pack and a Southern pack. I love to listen to the two packs talk shit in the Winter. Sound caries for miles in the deep cold. It gets vicious. 
 

We’ve had about three or four times more snow than we usually get. All the animals are using roads because the snow is so difficult to get through out in the woods. There is gonna be some crossover between them because of that, but in general the wolves stay in the hills.

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1 hour ago, Hate said:

Thanks for your concern, but the streets of The Woodlands have hardened me.  Within the last year, I have had to melt snow to flush the toilet and do the dishes and survived..neigh, thwarted a possible attack on my car by a clearly deranged coyote.  I didn't even have my gun on me either.  I think I could hang out with mooseoutfront.  I'd definitely be a better neighbor. 

I’m very happy you survived.
 

That which does not kill you makes you stronger as Mr. Sunshine said. 
 

if you’re ever in the area, let me know. We’ll throw a chunk of moose over the coals, sip on a jar of Bobby’s moonshine, twist up some homegrown  and wax poetic of adventures and shenanigans. 

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Beautiful day in Denali. Sunshine and 14 above. Almost T shirt weather. 

CBC8859C-1DBD-4CC1-8875-26C3FBCEB957.jpeg

Was staying at the Island House on Padre when Hurricane Hanna surprised us by turning north instead of hitting towards the valley as expected.  Sitting on the balcony watching the surf get bigger and bigger.  Only a few brave souls walking on the beach in front of the sea wall, which was only about ten yards wide and getting smaller by the minute.  Caught some movement from the direction of the dunes and see two full grown coyotes trot out of the dunes, casually trot down the beach north towards the jetty while people while people step aside and watch in stunned silence as they disappear up the beach towards the Holiday Inn.

Paco and I just looked at each other for a minute.  Did we see what we thought we saw?  We did. 

An hour later waves were hitting the sea wall and blasting water thirty feet in the air.  My sliding glass door on my ocean front condo was blown out of the track and we had to move to another room later that night and seeing those coyotes was still the damnedest thing about the whole experience.

How do you think you will adjust to a different climate when you do finally leave there.  I think you mentioned that the plan was to retire in Mexico.  That's quite a contrast in climate.

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1 hour ago, Hate said:

How do you think you will adjust to a different climate when you do finally leave there.  I think you mentioned that the plan was to retire in Mexico.  That's quite a contrast in climate.

I don't know.  We're of the North now.  70 degrees is hot to me.  80 is sweltering.  And fuck anything 90 or above.  The temps make coming back to Texas uncomfortable, but it's something that we do every quarter to check on my mom in Abilene.  I'll actually be in Abilene next week.

As for Mexico, I'm hoping as I get older my bones will appreciate the warmer temps.  We shall see though. 

Make sure the old lady is done with the hot flashes before moving.

On 3/11/2022 at 4:51 PM, mooseoutfront said:

I don't know.  We're of the North now.  70 degrees is hot to me.  80 is sweltering.  And fuck anything 90 or above.  The temps make coming back to Texas uncomfortable, but it's something that we do every quarter to check on my mom in Abilene.  I'll actually be in Abilene next week.

As for Mexico, I'm hoping as I get older my bones will appreciate the warmer temps.  We shall see though. 

It's crazy how adaptable the human body is. Like if I were you I'd be really careful about being in 95+ temps because I'd guess you'd have a higher proclivity to heat stroke at this point. Meanwhile - if one of us local Texans came up to Alaska the cold would kick our ass much quicker than it would yours. And not in just a "I can't stand this I have to go inside!" type of way but as a legit, measurable threshold for the body's physical ability to tolerate the temperature. 

That said - aren't places on the coast in Mexico warm but not super hot? Like - as long as it isn't over 90 or 95 most of the time I'd bet you'd adapt quickly and enjoy the shit out of it. 

Put me on a beach with a sea breeze under a palm tree and I will adapt in about thirty minutes.

Do y'all ever go see the Iditarod come by?   Man, those dogs run.

 

 

 

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On 3/12/2022 at 9:17 AM, luke duke said:

Make sure the old lady is done with the hot flashes before moving.

This hits a little too close to home right now. I try not to laugh and be understanding when she strips down to her underwear and stands outside at 20 to 30 below for 5 minutes to cool off. 
 

I can sympathize, but in no way can I empathize. 

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On 3/14/2022 at 10:24 AM, davidg said:

Do y'all ever go see the Iditarod come by?   Man, those dogs run.

 

 

 

The Iditarod rarely comes through my area. Every once in a while though due to trail conditions. Mushing is big up here. There are daily race updates on the radio. Mushers like Brent Sass and Jeff King are celebrities in Alaska. The Iditarod gets all the press, but the Yukon Quest is a much tougher race. 

On 3/10/2022 at 4:40 PM, mooseoutfront said:

You never run.  Triggers the predatory instinct.  Whether it's bears or wolves or whatever, you stand your ground and move away slowly.  Grizzlies will bluff charge you.  They'll run hard, right at you and then pull up 10 feet away.  It's a test.  You stand your ground and give 'em your best war face.  Think Leonidas in 300.  More often than not they'll turn and walk away.  I hope I never find out. 

You have had to scream at a grizzly charging you or is that anecdotal?

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4 minutes ago, Ten Bears said:

You have had to scream at a grizzly charging you or is that anecdotal?

I have never been bluff charged and I hope I never am, but standing your ground is the advice that’s given. 
 

I’ve only had one close encounter with a grizzly. He didn’t charge me, but I thought he was. I was taking a water sample by a stream and I heard this weird clicking sound. Looked all around and couldn’t find the source until I looked up. About 10 feet away above a row of alders I saw a grizzly head looking at me and snapping his jaws. He was standing on his hind legs looking over the bushes. I immediately started screaming at him. He looked at me for what seemed like an hour then he dropped his ears. I thought I was fucked. All I told myself to do was to play dead when he came at me. The pistol and bear spray were in the truck about 20 feet behind me. Well, he looked at me a little longer, dropped to all fours and went on his way. I composed myself inside the truck and when I knew he was gone I grabbed the tape measure and measured the alders at a little over 8 feet. That means the bear was at least 9 feet. That’s a big interior grizzly. If I would have tried to make it to the truck he would have come at me and had me before I would have even gotten close. 

16 minutes ago, mooseoutfront said:

I have never been bluff charged and I hope I never am, but standing your ground is the advice that’s given. 
 

I’ve only had one close encounter with a grizzly. He didn’t charge me, but I thought he was. I was taking a water sample by a stream and I heard this weird clicking sound. Looked all around and couldn’t find the source until I looked up. About 10 feet away above a row of alders I saw a grizzly head looking at me and snapping his jaws. He was standing on his hind legs looking over the bushes. I immediately started screaming at him. He looked at me for what seemed like an hour then he dropped his ears. I thought I was fucked. All I told myself to do was to play dead when he came at me. The pistol and bear spray were in the truck about 20 feet behind me. Well, he looked at me a little longer, dropped to all fours and went on his way. I composed myself inside the truck and when I knew he was gone I grabbed the tape measure and measured the alders at a little over 8 feet. That means the bear was at least 9 feet. That’s a big interior grizzly. If I would have tried to make it to the truck he would have come at me and had me before I would have even gotten close. 

 

Whoa.  I just peed myself a little just reading that.

 
Whoa.  I just peed myself a little just reading that.

I would keep a large caliber pistol literally strapped to my bare ass at all times, so I would never be unarmed, even when taking a crap.

You know who says stand your ground when a grizzly charges? The guy that ran away.

32 minutes ago, Ten Bears said:

 

Whoa.  I just peed myself a little just reading that.

user name does not check out

i always  wonder what this guy's heart rate looked like. it's like the bear didn't even notice him there!

 

Edited by mchookem

3 hours ago, mooseoutfront said:

I have never been bluff charged and I hope I never am, but standing your ground is the advice that’s given. 
 

I’ve only had one close encounter with a grizzly. He didn’t charge me, but I thought he was. I was taking a water sample by a stream and I heard this weird clicking sound. Looked all around and couldn’t find the source until I looked up. About 10 feet away above a row of alders I saw a grizzly head looking at me and snapping his jaws. He was standing on his hind legs looking over the bushes. I immediately started screaming at him. He looked at me for what seemed like an hour then he dropped his ears. I thought I was fucked. All I told myself to do was to play dead when he came at me. The pistol and bear spray were in the truck about 20 feet behind me. Well, he looked at me a little longer, dropped to all fours and went on his way. I composed myself inside the truck and when I knew he was gone I grabbed the tape measure and measured the alders at a little over 8 feet. That means the bear was at least 9 feet. That’s a big interior grizzly. If I would have tried to make it to the truck he would have come at me and had me before I would have even gotten close. 

What does one scream at a grizzly?  “OU sucks”?  “Craig James killed five ladies of the night”?  “SEC!  SEC!  SEC!”?  

2 hours ago, Brisketexan said:


I would keep a large caliber pistol literally strapped to my bare ass at all times, so I would never be unarmed, even when taking a crap.

My uncle has lived in Kalispell for several decades and has had a few run-ins with bears, none life-threatening. Just scared the shit out of him. He’s always said that the dumbest thing the average human can do is carry a handgun into bear country. He wishes everyone would carry bear spray instead. 

  • Author
3 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

What does one scream at a grizzly?  “OU sucks”?  “Craig James killed five ladies of the night”?  “SEC!  SEC!  SEC!”?  

A low pitched roar. Animalistic. Give em your war face as Gunny Hartman said. 
 

I might try OU sucks if I ever have to do it again. I mean even a grizzly has to respect the truth. 

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3 hours ago, tbone_ said:

Does bear spray really work?

Anecdotal evidence suggests bear spray is more affective than firearms. I usually carry both when out in the woods. Problem with bear spray is wind. You can only use it downwind or you end up blinding yourself. 

15 hours ago, tbone_ said:

Does bear spray really work?

Have heard mixed comments on my trips to Wyoming. Some people have told me the bears can be pretty adept at turning their heads to avoid it. I’ve always carried but never encountered one on foot.

12 hours ago, mooseoutfront said:

I might try OU sucks if I ever have to do it again. I mean even a grizzly has to respect the truth. 

I was going to say the bear would know you were speaking from the soul.

Most wisdom these days says that bear spray is effective at preventing bear attacks, but firearms are more effective at stopping them. The authors of the most cited studies have even come out and said that they are being misused.

22 hours ago, mooseoutfront said:

I have never been bluff charged and I hope I never am, but standing your ground is the advice that’s given. 
 

I’ve only had one close encounter with a grizzly. He didn’t charge me, but I thought he was. I was taking a water sample by a stream and I heard this weird clicking sound. Looked all around and couldn’t find the source until I looked up. About 10 feet away above a row of alders I saw a grizzly head looking at me and snapping his jaws. He was standing on his hind legs looking over the bushes. I immediately started screaming at him. He looked at me for what seemed like an hour then he dropped his ears. I thought I was fucked. All I told myself to do was to play dead when he came at me. The pistol and bear spray were in the truck about 20 feet behind me. Well, he looked at me a little longer, dropped to all fours and went on his way. I composed myself inside the truck and when I knew he was gone I grabbed the tape measure and measured the alders at a little over 8 feet. That means the bear was at least 9 feet. That’s a big interior grizzly. If I would have tried to make it to the truck he would have come at me and had me before I would have even gotten close. 

Found a pic of mooseoutfront...

big balls randy marsh GIF by South Park

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14 hours ago, Not a cat said:

Found a pic of mooseoutfront...

big balls randy marsh GIF by South Park

Lulz

Bears and wolves and the other forest creatures don’t bother me, but the ocean freaks me the fuck out. I will not get into it. Those critters make me squeal like a prepubescent girl. 

  • Author
14 hours ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

Most wisdom these days says that bear spray is effective at preventing bear attacks, but firearms are more effective at stopping them. The authors of the most cited studies have even come out and said that they are being misused.

Well said

19 hours ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

Most wisdom these days says that bear spray is effective at preventing bear attacks, but firearms are more effective at stopping them.

Having an out of shape companion increases survival chances exponentially.

On 3/19/2022 at 11:31 AM, mooseoutfront said:

I have never been bluff charged and I hope I never am, but standing your ground is the advice that’s given. 
 

I’ve only had one close encounter with a grizzly. He didn’t charge me, but I thought he was. I was taking a water sample by a stream and I heard this weird clicking sound. Looked all around and couldn’t find the source until I looked up. About 10 feet away above a row of alders I saw a grizzly head looking at me and snapping his jaws. He was standing on his hind legs looking over the bushes. I immediately started screaming at him. He looked at me for what seemed like an hour then he dropped his ears. I thought I was fucked. All I told myself to do was to play dead when he came at me. The pistol and bear spray were in the truck about 20 feet behind me. Well, he looked at me a little longer, dropped to all fours and went on his way. I composed myself inside the truck and when I knew he was gone I grabbed the tape measure and measured the alders at a little over 8 feet. That means the bear was at least 9 feet. That’s a big interior grizzly. If I would have tried to make it to the truck he would have come at me and had me before I would have even gotten close. 

A bush pilot we had in Alaska who takes private groups to watch Grizzlies told us that when you hear a griz "click" his jaw it is usually the last thing they do before they charge.  It apparently is their last expression of agitation before they act.....I hope I never hear that sound....

So this video came up after the one posted above.  Dude's got balls (and a large pistol) to bluff on the bear.   Comments mentioned that they were watching some other bears in the other direction and this one kinda snuck up on them.  Dude is a guide and loaned his bear spray to another person that day.  Said they were in a remote area and that the bear was a juvenile and probable had never encountered humans before.

 

The video above is not titled at all correctly.  The human is very lucky in that video.

3 hours ago, davidg said:

So this video came up after the one posted above.  Dude's got balls (and a large pistol) to bluff on the bear.   Comments mentioned that they were watching some other bears in the other direction and this one kinda snuck up on them.  Dude is a guide and loaned his bear spray to another person that day.  Said they were in a remote area and that the bear was a juvenile and probable had never encountered humans before.

 

Man.  No thanks.

On 3/19/2022 at 1:18 PM, Brisketexan said:


I would keep a large caliber pistol literally strapped to my bare ass at all times, so I would never be unarmed, even when taking a crap.

A pistol? You want to piss the bear off before he kills you?

4 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

A pistol? You want to piss the bear off before he kills you?

PiiYAf.gif

10 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

A pistol? You want to piss the bear off before he kills you?

And a Desert Eagle, that's one great big old pistol
I mean, fifty caliber made by bad-ass Hebrews

Love this thread.  

 

Was up there in Anchorage 2 weekends ago when 15+ inches of snow dropped.  Wanted to get out beyond the valley and no dice.  Was gorgeous though.  

Most likely will end up outside of Anchorage sooner rather than never.  

Why do people up there not like it when I call break up season, Codependent season?  

I will add remote Alaska folks are unique.  By unique I mean quirky to all extremes.  Hard working, tough as nails, surviving, thriving, grateful, and addicts galore.  Support for others and words like don't step foot on my property again have authority. Crazy summabitches to get outside in the ridiculously cold and I get looked at funny down here in the lower 40 when I say snow machine.  I blame yall. 

 

On the unique note, had a drunkass 54 year old Homer fishing lady hitting on me at the hotel bar.  She runs a B&B down there now.  Can confirm she did not smell like fish thankfully.  

Kevin Bacon has 6* of separation and if you spend time up there, have family there, or have worked in energy, from upstream down, the service industry, etc. you are closer to 2* of separation.  Everyone knows everyone in this weird way. 

 

If I can make things happen with my company up there, I may have a 500g trailered offset ready to go and smoke some brisket, ribs, etc. this summer.  It's a decent trip for you and I promise the bbq won't be the shitshow you're used to by now. Turnagain, etc. is terrible.  🤣

Edited by Doc Holliday
Homer lady

13 hours ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

This is a great read. 

Love this tidbit...

We found six cases involving a .22 rimfire pistol. Five were successful, against black bears. One failed against a polar bear.

I'd throw that into the "no fucking shit" category.

14 hours ago, ztejas said:

This is a great read. 

Love this tidbit...

We found six cases involving a .22 rimfire pistol. Five were successful, against black bears. One failed against a polar bear.

I'd throw that into the "no fucking shit" category.

I think you might be better served shooting yourself with a .22 rimfire rather than the polar bear.

31 minutes ago, The Royal We said:

I think you might be better served shooting yourself with a .22 rimfire rather than the polar bear.

you shoot your buddy in the knee and run like hell. 

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