June 9, 20187 yr Oh God, ease our suffering in this, our moment of great dispair. Yea, admit this good and decent woman into thine arms in the flock in thine heavenly area, up there. And Moab, he laid its down by the band of the Canaanites, and yea, though the Hindus speak of karma, I implore you: give her... give her a break.
June 9, 20187 yr I'm going steady, and I French kiss. So, everybody does that. Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best at it.
June 9, 20187 yr “Rusty! Listen to your mother. I was speeding. I was driving like a maniac. We can all be grateful for this man for stopping us. You see kids... “ “Here's the leash, sir. I'm going back to get the rest of the carcass off the road.”
June 10, 20187 yr Or perhaps you don't want to see the second largest ball of twine on earth which is only 4 short hours away...
June 11, 20187 yr Y'know what I think??? I think you're all fucked in the head! We're ten hours from the fuckin' fun park and you want to bail out. Well I'll tell you something, this is no longer a vacation...it's a quest. It's a quest for fun! I'm gonna have fun and you're gonna have fun! We're all gonna have so much fuckin' fun we'll need plastic surgery to remove our goddamn smiles! You'll be whistling Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah out of your assholes!!! HAHAHA!!! I gotta be crazy; I'm on a pilgrimage to see a moose! Praise Marty Moose! Holy shit!!!
June 11, 20187 yr Rusty: Is that a real gun, Mom? Ellen: I don't know, Rusty, but when this is all over, your father... may be going away for a little while.
June 11, 20187 yr Okay, now, uh, you see -- you see which way you're pointing, right? Yeah, okay, that's good 'cause you see that place? You see where it say "rib tips"? Rib tips. yeah. mm-hmm. Yeah, well, fuck that. don't go that way. Now you're gonna go all the way down about half a block and you'll see a Torino with no wheels on it. Now, inside that Torino is my cousin Jackie. Now, you tell him you my boy and that you lost, and he'll make sure you get to where you going 'cause you don't want to know from me, man. This ain't even my neighborhood. I'm from the west side of Chicago, here on vacation. Edited June 11, 20187 yr by PencilPusher fixed format
June 12, 20187 yr Author On 6/9/2018 at 1:50 PM, Liquor and Poker said: I'm going steady, and I French kiss. So, everybody does that. Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best at it.
June 12, 20187 yr Author On 6/10/2018 at 10:52 AM, RamjetFDO said: Reeeeeeal tomato ketchup Eddie? Nothing but the best!
June 15, 20187 yr Audrey, you remember what you said when I asked you where you wanted to go for vacation?
June 15, 20187 yr Shit, I screwed that up. One of 'em said "Hawaii, Dad?" and Clark said, "Shut up, (name)!" and then asked the other kid and they said "Wally World, Dad?" Been awhile since I've seen that movie actually.
June 15, 20187 yr They had to replace my metal plate with a plastic one. Every time Catherine would rev up the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour.
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