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Metal on metal is a complete human noise.  It's not found in nature.  Our sonar detects biologics where it says "I'm a whale". The grinding and pounding says bro, I'm doing white people shit.

16 hours ago, Horn Dogg said:

Maybe the banging was just the sound of a squid eating Haymish

 

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2 minutes ago, Helobious said:

You being an Ian Miles Cheong fanboy is the least surprising thing I’ve learned today

I don't know who the fuck that is. It was the first reply to a tweet upthread. 

15 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

image.thumb.png.8ed99a180d2cb3fd1b49d29bcea2d1d0.png

 

20 minutes ago, 'stache said:

So even if they find it they can't pull it back up? What's the point then? If they find it, I suggest they torpedo it to put those poor people out of their misery. 

poor-there-aint-nobody-poor-frank-sinatr

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2 minutes ago, FartingMonk said:

Metal on metal is a complete human noise.  It's not found in nature.  Our sonar detects biologics where it says "I'm a whale". The grinding and pounding says bro, I'm doing white people shit.

 

 

Magma displacement?

 

/runs home to mama

Edited by dcbc

2 minutes ago, dcbc said:

Magma displacement?

/runs home to mama

more likely it is a caterpillar drive (magneto hydrodynamic propulsion system)

 

8 minutes ago, ztejas said:

I don't know who the fuck that is. It was the first reply to a tweet upthread. 

I really thought you quoted yourself.

Im logging off for today

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2 minutes ago, Helobious said:

I really thought you quoted yourself.

Im logging off for today

At 2:49 p.m., we lost contact with Helobious.  He was descending at the time.

Edited by dcbc

Best page of the thread right here. It's got everything and we're barely started.

Ok. Time to stop fucking around and really solve this. I'm going to finally read this book and see what my man Jules has to say.

Distance, depth, whatever we need a new/old take on it.

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3 minutes ago, dcbc said:

At 2:49 p.m., we lost contact with Helobious.  He was descending at the time.

And most likely shitting in a bucket

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3 minutes ago, dcbc said:

At 2:49 p.m., we lost contact with Helobious.  He was descending at the time.

Sonar picked up a light tapping noise coming from the depths, likely the sound of a cheap fake gold chain on the metal hull.  Translated from Morse Code the taps read: "Let's go Yankees! Tiktok rules bitchhhhhhh"

2 minutes ago, ConferenceRoom said:

Best page of the thread right here. It's got everything and we're barely started.

Not even close. I just discovered this thread today and I cried laughing at the Xzibit Yo Dawg meme and "Go 'Stros" comment about banging being heard.

Edited by gofuckyourself

49 minutes ago, Helobious said:

Now that actually is fake. No article linked, google turns up nothing

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Call me evil but this made me laugh. 

 

And because the world just is NOT weird enough for us:

“U.S.-listed shares of Logitech International SA, a Swiss maker of computer peripherals and software, were down about 3.6% Monday, amid reports that one of the company’s gamepads was being used to steer the submersible that went missing while taking five people down to the wreck of the Titanic. 

Logitech’s $30 F710 gamepad was the controller of the OceanGate submarine vessel that is the subject of a massive sea-and-air search, according to a segment on the “CBS News Sunday Morning Show” by reporter David Pogue that aired last November.”

 

IMG_6676.jpeg

I once had a Logitech F510 Rumblepad and can confirm the issue.

I lost contact with Batman Arkham Asylum several times. It really sucked.

5 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

And because the world just is NOT weird enough for us:

“U.S.-listed shares of Logitech International SA, a Swiss maker of computer peripherals and software, were down about 3.6% Monday, amid reports that one of the company’s gamepads was being used to steer the submersible that went missing while taking five people down to the wreck of the Titanic. 

Logitech’s $30 F710 gamepad was the controller of the OceanGate submarine vessel that is the subject of a massive sea-and-air search, according to a segment on the “CBS News Sunday Morning Show” by reporter David Pogue that aired last November.”

 

IMG_6676.jpeg

great job on taking post 666, Nicole

I don't see why Logitech is taking the blame. Yeah, their Bluetooth controllers disconnect... hell, their usb stuff sometimes doesn't register. But it's designed for games, not actual real shit where lives depend on it!

17 minutes ago, dcbc said:

At 2:49 p.m., we lost contact with Helobious.  He was descending at the time.

We're never going to find him because there won't be any sounds of banging.

Everybody keeps talking about how many hours left - If they were still alive, and if the British and Pakistani dudes haven't beaten the CEO to death by now, I'd be surprised.

16 minutes ago, Rimbo said:

great job on taking post 666, Nicole

I don't see why Logitech is taking the blame. Yeah, their Bluetooth controllers disconnect... hell, their usb stuff sometimes doesn't register. But it's designed for games, not actual real shit where lives depend on it!

Shit. That was unintentional. I’ve been marked by the beast.666. Fuck.

I have to say, this thread is about as fun as a discussion of 5 people dying a horrific death can get. Let’s do it again, same time next year?

4 minutes ago, UncleSonny said:

I have to say, this thread is about as fun as a discussion of 5 people dying a horrific death can get. Let’s do it again, same time next year?

Between this thread and the Taliban/Office Space thread, Surly has come through strong the past couple of weeks.

I have to say, this thread is about as fun as a discussion of 5 people dying a horrific death can get. Let’s do it again, same time next year?

I’m still in shock Billionaires willingly signed up, paid insane money, boarded and were bolted shut from the outside.

I couldn’t script this one 5 days ago.
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2 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

 

And...that's how we found out that Brian is a poster on Surly.  

3 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

 


I do my best thinking ……

1 hour ago, Helobious said:

The tiktok video I saw was a former navy guy that seems pretty knowledgeable on other stuff. The vid was basically him commenting on that NBC news tour of the sub. Someone in the comment section said the hatch being bolted shut thing was false. Seemed way more believable than the alternative. If it ends up being true you’ll all look pretty dumb for making so much fun of me about it.

Holy shit dude. So it wasn't even the "guy that seems pretty knowledgeable" but just some random person in the comments?!?

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2 hours ago, Helobious said:

 

I saw a tiktok video and one of the commenters on it said it was untrue. It makes more sense that it’s openable from the inside anyway. So I guess “proven” was the wrong word. More like it’s currently unknown.

 

1 hour ago, Helobious said:

The tiktok video I saw was a former navy guy that seems pretty knowledgeable on other stuff. The vid was basically him commenting on that NBC news tour of the sub. Someone in the comment section said the hatch being bolted shut thing was false. Seemed way more believable than the alternative. If it ends up being true you’ll all look pretty dumb for making so much fun of me about it.

 

1 hour ago, Helobious said:

Now that actually is fake. No article linked, google turns up nothing

 

28baa44e3c8afcb5354f2614ba5c055b.gif

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Just now, tx 3 putt said:

 

This just in....a documentary on the loss of the documentarians who were filming a documentary on the missing tourist submarine touring the sunken ship will air NEXT Thursday.....

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I wrote a few limericks inspired by this apparent tragedy.

 

There once was a Canadian submersible

Twas not much larger than a convertible

It dove down to see

Part of ocean history

But now it is irretrievable

 

 

The wealthy crammed into a can

Each one a Titanic fan

As they dove to the depths below

You could hear them scream oh no

Surely we have a good rescue plan

 

 

For this journey we paid a quarter mil

The pilot seems like a shill

It is so cold and so dark

I would like to disembark

But all we can do is chill

2 minutes ago, SquishMitten said:

Holy shit dude. So it wasn't even the "guy that seems pretty knowledgeable" but just some random person in the comments?!?

 

Just now, Native Horn said:

I wrote a few limericks inspired by this apparent tragedy.

 

There once was a Canadian submersible

Twas not much larger than a convertible

It dove down to see

Part of ocean history

But now it is irretrievable

 

 

The wealthy crammed into a can

Each one a Titanic fan

As they dove to the depths below

You could hear them scream oh no

Surely we have a good rescue plan

 

 

For this journey we paid a quarter mil

The pilot seems like a shill

It is so cold and so dark

I would like to disembark

But all we can do is chill

Haikus are the way to go:

 

Let's get in this can

Wait, we're sinking, sealed inside?

OU sucks

 

I may not have gotten the syllable count right, yet I'm pretty sure what I typed is still correct.

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Got lots of money

Let's be absurdly stupid

And now we are dead

12 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

 

He better hope stepdad isn't rescued because if he wasn't already written out of the will, he will be now!

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13 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

 

Poor kid just wanted to go the suffocation route as well 😌

Holy shit, this thread.

Notta gonna lie, this is not the tragedy that I would have predicted would bring a divided nation together. Everyone loves sick memes.

26 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Between this thread and the Taliban/Office Space thread, Surly has come through strong the past couple of weeks.

it's been one of the better off seasons, yeah

9 minutes ago, C-Man said:

He better hope stepdad isn't rescued because if he wasn't already written out of the will, he will be now!

As he will soon be grieving the loss of his stepdad (not even his real dad), its important to let the womens understand that he may just have a little extra change in his pocket soon. Especially, the type of women that advertise on social media that they want to sit on his face. He's running a higher risk play here, but I can dig it.

8 minutes ago, aggie08 said:

Holy shit, this thread.

Notta gonna lie, this is not the tragedy that I would have predicted would bring a divided nation together. Everyone loves sick memes.

Hey. If there's one thing I've learned from studying literature in high school and at UT, it's that everyone loves watching rich people be miserable and suffer tragedy. We want to see the poor guy win and the rich guy suffer.

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27 minutes ago, Native Horn said:

I wrote a few limericks inspired by this apparent tragedy.

 

1,689 miles east of Nantucket . . . . 

Edited by dcbc

16 minutes ago, OU Sucks said:

Poor kid just wanted to go the suffocation route as well 😌

It’s only his step dad. Give the guy a break

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33 minutes ago, Tylerocks said:

Where is the Oxygen countdown site?

This all seems very futile.

 

sub.png

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10 minutes ago, dcbc said:

1,689 miles east of Nantucket . . . . 

A rich man was shitting in a bucket . . . .

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41 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

 

And that, kids, is how I met your mother! 

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