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  • Popular Post
4 minutes ago, Evil Bill Obrien said:

A rich man was shitting in a bucket . . . .

You could smell the stench in the Mariana Trench,

Tik Tok is a news source, who'd have thunk it.

Edited by dcbc

  • Replies 1.7k
  • Views 139.1k
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5 minutes ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

And that, kids, is how I met your mother! 


lulz he’s 36 

33 minutes ago, 'stache said:

Got lots of money

Let's be absurdly stupid

And now we are dead

If only I'd known

This stupid can of a sub

Was built by aggy

1 hour ago, dcbc said:

At 2:49 p.m., we lost contact with Helobious.  He was descending at the time.

I am U-571. Destroy me.

20 minutes ago, dcbc said:

1,689 miles east of Nantucket . . . . 

Said the CEO: Safety? Fuck it!

44 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Haikus are the way to go:

 

Let's get in this can

Wait, we're sinking, sealed inside?

OU sucks

 

I may not have gotten the syllable count right, yet I'm pretty sure what I typed is still correct.

Even at 13,000 Ft deep, OU still sucks!

55 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

 

“To find a drowning man, one must become a drowning man”

Confucius

He wants to drown in some ass

Trapped in a small sub

Breakfast nachos wasn't smart

The smell killed my friends

  • Popular Post

Building my own submersible. I hope to have it operational shortly. 

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  • Popular Post
38 minutes ago, Evil Bill Obrien said:

A rich man was shitting in a bucket . . . .

He sighed with despair 

“before we run out of air, 

If I take out my dick who will suck it?”

There once was a sub from Nantucket...with a hatch so tight, it stuck it.

They screamed with chagrin, as they started to descend, Cap'n just shat in the bucket.

5 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

Building my own submersible. I hope to have it operational shortly. 

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I'd take whatever this bullshit is going to turn into over being on a Russian ship.  

9 minutes ago, Nicole44 said:

Building my own submersible. I hope to have it operational shortly. 

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Gonna need a few of these so you can see inside that thing:

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Edited by Evil Bill Obrien
Words are hard

49 minutes ago, Homercles said:

 

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Holy shit I think even those poor bastards trapped in the sub lasted longer than Liz Truss

1 minute ago, Homercles said:

If you look at the video in this Reddit post, it looks like there is no ‘hatch’…the whole thing cracks open just before the foreskin.  Pretty sure they just bolt it shut from the outside. 
 

https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/14f6kpc/a_tour_of_the_submarine_that_disappeared_near/

 

please, we're Americans... we don't know what "foreskin" is

19 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

He sighed with despair 

“before we run out of air, 

If I take out my dick who will suck it?”

 

18 minutes ago, slorch said:

There once was a sub from Nantucket...with a hatch so tight, it stuck it.

They screamed with chagrin, as they started to descend, Cap'n just shat in the bucket.

Said it before, saying it again....god I love this place.

Also, my destiny being "burn in hell for eternity" is a done-deal at this point.

33 minutes ago, Homercles said:

If you look at the video in this Reddit post, it looks like there is no ‘hatch’…the whole thing cracks open just before the foreskin.  Pretty sure they just bolt it shut from the outside. 
 

https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/14f6kpc/a_tour_of_the_submarine_that_disappeared_near/

 

The decision to put the shitter right at the only viewing window is Mensa-level.

1 hour ago, Pig Bellmont said:

It’s only his step dad. Give the guy a break

Stepdad stuck in a can....

Thata not how these scripts are supposed to go... 

I’m assuming that the tapping sound was really Morse code, and the message was, “Hey y’all, hold my beer!”

Edit: did Gatorubet see post 661 before his idiot ass started talking about Morse code? No, no, he didn’t.

Edited by Gatorubet

  • Popular Post
3 hours ago, CurlyDumps said:

Here's journalist David Pogue who rode in the Titan saying they're bolted in from the outside:

 

 

If you want to stay informed, you have to read the comments on TikTok videos. It’s called doing your own research. 

2 hours ago, Nicole44 said:

 

1 hour ago, Pig Bellmont said:

It’s only his step dad. Give the guy a break

1 hour ago, tx 3 putt said:

lulz he’s 36 

90% of Blink-182 concertgoers are 30-somethings who hate their stepparents and won't shut the fuck up about them.

11 minutes ago, Homercles said:

Helobious is wrong more than Rocko

all that hate’s gonna burn you up, kid

17 minutes ago, Homercles said:

Helobious is wrong more than Rocko

Helobious us giving Hermanator a run for his money

You have to think that it would be well known if they imploded. I don’t know if the SOSUS nets are still maintained, but I’d bet there were more than a few vessels capable of detecting the sound  in the relative vicinity, and that they could correlate the time stamp and calculate if such a noise would match up with the bearing and distance to the wreck site. 
 

I suspect they get to go the asphyxiation route. I’d also bet that everyone on that thing has their cell phone on them, and I d be morbidly curious to see if they left videos or notes once their plight became very certain or their batteries were almost done. Something else to consider…it’s got to be very, very cold in that tub and they may die of hypothermia before they suffocate. 

Edited by Bobby_Batronic

2 hours ago, Horn Dog said:

“To find a drowning man, one must become a drowning man”

Confucius

It’s his stepdad, not like they’re really related or anything. 
 

Well shit, I now see we already covered this. Oh well. 

Edited by Fudge Nuggets

I want to say thank you to these dumbasses and their ungrateful step kids for providing plenty of lulz these last few days. 

37 minutes ago, Bobby_Batronic said:

You have to think that it would be well known if they imploded. I don’t know if the SOSUS nets are still maintained, but I’d bet there were more than a few vessels capable of detecting the sound  in the relative vicinity, and that they could correlate the time stamp and calculate if such a noise would match up with the bearing and distance to the wreck site. 
 

I suspect they get to go the asphyxiation route. I’d also bet that everyone on that thing has their cell phone on them, and I d be morbidly curious to see if they left videos or notes once their plight became very certain or their batteries were almost done. Something else to consider…it’s got to be very, very cold in that tub and they may die of hypothermia before they suffocate. 

Owen Wilson Environment GIF by AOK

40 minutes ago, Bobby_Batronic said:

You have to think that it would be well known if they imploded. I don’t know if the SOSUS nets are still maintained, but I’d bet there were more than a few vessels capable of detecting the sound  in the relative vicinity, and that they could correlate the time stamp and calculate if such a noise would match up with the bearing and distance to the wreck site. 
 

I suspect they get to go the asphyxiation route. I’d also bet that everyone on that thing has their cell phone on them, and I d be morbidly curious to see if they left videos or notes once their plight became very certain or their batteries were almost done. Something else to consider…it’s got to be very, very cold in that tub and they may die of hypothermia before they suffocate. 

I'm still going with an implosion, which to me would be better than just waiting out the lack of power and O2.

But to you other point about hypothermia, they would most likely be lacking in water (irony) to drink. 3days without is no bueno.

Either way, we'll be hearing the switch to a recovery phase later tomorrow (not that they'll be found). SAR has been for the families, News outlets, just for training, & show.

4 minutes ago, BillyGoatHill said:

I'm still going with an implosion, which to me would be better than just waiting out the lack of power and O2.

But to you other point about hypothermia, they would most likely be lacking in water (irony) to drink. 3days without is no bueno.

Either way, we'll be hearing the switch to a recovery phase later tomorrow (not that they'll be found). SAR has been for the families, News outlets, just for training, & show.

The walls supposedly were heated (for as long as the batteries held out).  The switch to turn on the heat likely was on the outside of the sub, if I had to guess based on the other design "features."  

Edited by dcbc

2 hours ago, Captainant said:

Helobious us giving Hermanator a run for his money

Shit, I thought they were the same person

  • Popular Post

This thread has everything 

 

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  • Popular Post

Almost everything.

I'm holding out for the MS Paint Thread of Aquatic Dominance.

1 minute ago, Covri said:

This thread has everything 

 

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needs more tits

 

but I'll settle for more pix of Brea's tuckus

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2 hours ago, Homercles said:

If you look at the video in this Reddit post, it looks like there is no ‘hatch’…the whole thing cracks open just before the foreskin.  Pretty sure they just bolt it shut from the outside. 
 

https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/14f6kpc/a_tour_of_the_submarine_that_disappeared_near/

 

Some gold from that thread:

Quote

 

We have no clue what happened to this submersible. Most of the comments about it are either pointing out an engineering peculiarity (like the game controller, makeshift nature of the submersible), or saying it's just rich people so who cares?

What I want to know is why aren't we considering the possibility that a massive creature attacked a deep-sea submersible, leaving it disabled and trapping the crew at the bottom of the Atlantic? With time running out, a visionary oceanographer could recruit rescue diver Jason Statham to save the crew and the sea itself from an unimaginable threat -- a 75-foot-long prehistoric shark known as the Megalodon.

 

 

Edited by Auto Driller

23 minutes ago, BillyGoatHill said:

I'm still going with an implosion, which to me would be better than just waiting out the lack of power and O2.

But to you other point about hypothermia, they would most likely be lacking in water (irony) to drink. 3days without is no bueno.

Either way, we'll be hearing the switch to a recovery phase later tomorrow (not that they'll be found). SAR has been for the families, News outlets, just for training, & show.

I think it would have been heard. Most likely by the mother ship to begin with. Sound travels very quickly underwater and it would be easy to time stamp it to match the time the sub was lost  

Also, they were only 15 minutes from finishing their dive and navigating the entire way. I bet it won’t take long to actually locate them once they get assets on hand to search with ROV’s. I would suspect that they had a plan on where to approach the debris field and wreck from, and they’re not far from it. 
 

The fact that it didn’t surface on its own with the tethers to the ballast suggests it’s either stuck in the mud, perhaps snagged on debris or the wreck itself or, and this is highly possible, Oceangate’s system failed or they pencil whipped the dissolving attachments. 
 

I’d think w very wealthy families involved will foot the bill to find and recover them if the assets currently on hand fail or are called off. The thing will surface in its own if it’s still buoyant and an ROV can snip the ties to its ballast bags.

Lack of water is very valid. They surely had something onboard to drink. It’s they were going to be down for hours on end and probably had several bottles of water per person on hand or the equivalent. It’s not live on it for a month stuff, but maybe enough to last more than the standard three days.

It would be merciful if it did implode.  
 

 

 

Edited by Bobby_Batronic

12 minutes ago, Covri said:

This thread has everything 

 

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Thread of the year.

17 minutes ago, dcbc said:

The walls supposedly were heated (for as long as the batteries held out).  The switch to turn on the heat likely was on the outside of the sub, if I had to guess based on the other design "features."  

I wouldn’t rule out the heating system getting a little too ambitious and the thing turning into an oven for the same reason.

In the “survived and sunk to the bottom” case I read another nightmare to consider in the Reddit thread. We all envision that they sunk and landed horizontally like we see in all the photos. But it’s just as likely they they settled vertically and are standing face to face as they contemplate their fate. Hopefully shitter end down…

2 minutes ago, Auto Driller said:

I wouldn’t rule out the heating system getting a little too ambitious and the thing turning into an oven for the same reason.

In the “survived and sunk to the bottom” case I read another nightmare to consider in the Reddit thread. We all envision that they sunk and landed horizontally like we see in all the photos. But it’s just as likely they they settled vertically and are standing face to face as they contemplate their fate. Hopefully shitter end down…

Holy shit that would suck

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