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Featured Replies

#51
26 minutes ago, Parliament said:

 

Response to that:

My fiancé and I were on this plane. We originally thought people near us had a wet fart/shart. Turns out this was two cabins ahead of us, like 50 yards ahead. Flight staff sprayed vanilla lysol everywhere to try to fix the smell so we were just inhaling vanilla poop essentially
It was a lady in pants. Legitimately incredible exit velocity to be able to smother an entire cabin carpet like that. Imagine the Statcast numbers

 

#54

I hope I’m not jinxing myself, but I’ve never come close to shitting myself. Sounds a nightmare experience for this woman, but I don’t see how you don’t make it to a bathroom. 

#55
1 hour ago, Aqua Buddha said:

Response to that:

My fiancé and I were on this plane. We originally thought people near us had a wet fart/shart. Turns out this was two cabins ahead of us, like 50 yards ahead. Flight staff sprayed vanilla lysol everywhere to try to fix the smell so we were just inhaling vanilla poop essentially
It was a lady in pants. Legitimately incredible exit velocity to be able to smother an entire cabin carpet like that. Imagine the Statcast numbers

 

How the fuck is that humanly possible??  My God

#60

Yeah this is my biggest travel fear so I will not shame her. I feel awful for her. There’s basically nothing you can do when nature calls 

#61

I've seen them turn away people at the jetway for being too drunk to fly.  Their worry is they'll cause a scene and have the plane diverted costing the airline a ton of money.  I've heard them ask how much a person has had to drink before/during their time in the terminal.  

Why can't we carry that over into "what have you had to eat today, ma'am?"  If the response is, "Before I left home, some old bean dip and a bowl of grape nuts.  Then, Near gate 3, I had 2 cups of straight Popeye's gravy-shooters style.  A diet A&W root beer with my Cinnabon.  Two pork tacos, medium rare.  And because I'm a platinum member, all the espresso I could drink in the Club."  That person doesn't get to board either.  

 

#62
3 hours ago, Trey3216 said:

How the fuck is that humanly possible??  My God

Ate the entire pot of Jade's chili. 

#64

So in the event of this happening again, is it like the oxygen mask rule?  Do you affix the diaper to yourself first before assisting others, or?  

#65
3 hours ago, Js1 said:

Yeah this is my biggest travel fear so I will not shame her. I feel awful for her. There’s basically nothing you can do when nature calls 

I mean part of me worries for the person but I’ve never uncontrollably shit myself, much less shit myself so badly that a plane was diverted. Unless this person was unconscious from illness, they fucked up. There are internal warnings before you completely lose control of your bowels 

#67
2 minutes ago, Pig Bellmont said:

I mean part of me worries for the person but I’ve never uncontrollably shit myself, much less shit myself so badly that a plane was diverted. Unless this person was unconscious from illness, they fucked up. There are internal warnings before you completely lose control of your bowels 

But...I mean....sometimes it DOES just sneak up on ya....

9f26a7170f4b0a922c83a291075ae9b574ce3967

#68

At this exact moment, somewhere in Georgia...there's a passenger from this flight kicking themselves upon the revelation they could have shouted as the now infamous passenger bolted by their row, "Miss!  You didn't forget the coffee!"  

  • 5 months later...
#69
Delta flight forced to turn back after maggots fall on passengers https://t.co/VovZOlAqOs
Quote

The flight on Tuesday 13 February was transporting travellers from Amsterdam to Detroit, Michigan, when a passenger’s suitcase containing rotting fish was in the overhead bin and opened up resulting in maggots falling onto passengers and the plane turning around

 

Edited by TheStoicPaisano

#71
11 hours ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

when a passenger’s suitcase containing rotting fish was in the overhead bin and opened up resulting in maggots falling onto passengers and the plane turning around

this is the actual shit TSA should be looking for.  whoever that was should be banned from air travel for the rest of their lives (along with people who stick their feet onto your armrest from the row behind)

#72
16 minutes ago, elfenix said:

this is the actual shit TSA should be looking for.  whoever that was should be banned from air travel for the rest of their lives (along with people who stick their feet onto your armrest from the row behind)

Along with the people who use the seat in front of them to pull their fat ass self out of their own seat 

#73

'Maggots on a Plane' starring Samuel L. Jackson.  Coming to theaters this April.

"THERE ARE MOTHER FUCKING MAGGOTS ON THIS GODDAMN PLANE!"  

I mean, they're really just super-small snakes.  That cause all kinds of intestinal diseases.  This could be something...

#74
22 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

'Maggots on a Plane' starring Samuel L. Jackson.  Coming to theaters this April.

 

It could also be used for Idris Elbas' S2 of Hijack on Apple+, which everyone is trying to figure out how he'd ever be on another plane that gets hijacked. Just when you thought it was safe to return to the skies, "Hijacked by Maggots."

#75
On 9/5/2023 at 6:59 PM, chainsaw said:

There but for the grace of pepto bismol go I

Heck with that,give me a handful of Imodium AD multi symptom tablets, problem is...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You won't shit again for 1 to 2 weeks.

#76
On 9/6/2023 at 11:40 AM, Js1 said:

Yeah this is my biggest travel fear so I will not shame her. I feel awful for her. There’s basically nothing you can do when nature calls 

Yep, you don't mess with mother nature...

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