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we’ve gone full running man

What the fuck:

 

Quote

The program pitch reportedly starts with 12 pre-vetted contestants arriving at Ellis Island in New York City aboard “The Citizen Ship.” The show’s host—preferably a “famous, naturalized American” like Colombian Sofia Vergara or Canadian Ryan Reynolds—will welcome them with a personalized baseball glove.

Contestants would then travel from state to state aboard a train called “The American” to learn about each region’s history and culture and compete in themed contests, ranging from balancing on logs in Hayward, Wisconsin to building and launching a rocket in Florida’s Cape Canaveral, which houses a major NASA hub.

Officials from the U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services are reportedly being eyed to tally votes.

“We’ll join in the laughter, tears, frustration, and joy—hearing their backstories—as we are reminded how amazing it is to be American,” the pitch reads.

 

Quote

The losing contestants will go home with “iconically American” prizes, including a million American Airlines points, a $10,000 Starbucks gift card, and a lifetime supply of 76 gasoline. They will also have a leg up as they undergo the traditional citizenship process.

The big winner, meanwhile, will get sworn in as an American citizen on Capitol Hill by “a top American politician or judge.”

“There won’t be a dry eye within 10 miles,” the pitch reads

 

 

26 minutes ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

Contestants would then travel from state to state

YARN | - No papers? - No papers. State to state. | The Hunt ...

 

55 minutes ago, Firemans4Horn said:

For fucks sake

 

 

 

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56 minutes ago, Firemans4Horn said:

For fucks sake

 

 

“The Department of Homeland Security receives hundreds of television show pitches a year,” she said in a statement. “Each proposal undergoes a thorough vetting process prior to denial or approval.”

 

Um what?

“The Department of Homeland Security receives hundreds of television show pitches a year,” she said in a statement. “Each proposal undergoes a thorough vetting process prior to denial or approval.”
 
Um what?

Okay…wait…hear me out…it’s American Ninja Warrior…but Mexican…and we make em cross the Rio with alligators and obstacles and machine guns and shit!

Or wait, here’s my other one: hot chicks with big boobs wrasslin’ and ripping each others clothes off. Now, maybe it’s not Homeland Security-related, but importantly: tits.

I would just appreciate if this cunt would get off my tv yelling at immigrants during the local news breaks in the morning. “You will never return”. Fuck you you fucking cunt. 

I know it has been said a million times, but the creators of this Matrix are clearly testing how absurd a reality our minds can be made to believe.

Edited by hookem2010

Haven't read the whole thread, but I can't f'ing believe DHS is spending $200 mill on those sh*t ads with Kristi Noem. 2024 budget for public broadcasting was $535 million.

Why are we spending money to advertise a federal agency? It's not recruiting related, it's purely for publicity.

What the actual f*ck?

Name it "Ow, may balls" and the circle is complete.

3 hours ago, Firemans4Horn said:

For fucks sake

 

 

Legit thinking about leaving the US for europe or australia

40 minutes ago, GreenspointTexas said:

Legit thinking about leaving the US for europe or australia

Not trying to be a dick because I don’t blame anyone for looking at their options, but nurse anesthetists don’t make nearly the kind of money that you’re accustomed to here in other parts of the world. You would have to learn to live on a greatly reduced salary and an increased cost of living. Not a great equation.

2 hours ago, NYTransplant said:

Why are we spending money to advertise a federal agency? It's not recruiting related, it's purely for publicity fear mongering and cruelty  

Fixed

1 hour ago, royiv said:

You would have to learn to live on a greatly reduced salary and an increased cost of living.

Not sure I agree with your police work there. I guess if you’re talking about London or something. 

For fucks sake
 
 
I bet they literally make them jump through hoops... because they a just that unoriginal.
8 hours ago, royiv said:

Not trying to be a dick because I don’t blame anyone for looking at their options, but nurse anesthetists don’t make nearly the kind of money that you’re accustomed to here in other parts of the world. You would have to learn to live on a greatly reduced salary and an increased cost of living. Not a great equation.

And Oz, like most commonwealth countries, has a pretty draconian immigration set up, even for white males.

Edited by TwiceHorn

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I fully support the game show under one condition.

 

 Stephen Miller and Noem have to participate and, if at the end, the immigrants are more knowledgeable about America and the Constitution then  those 2 get voted off the island.

12 hours ago, Brisketexan said:


Okay…wait…hear me out…it’s American Ninja Warrior…but Mexican…and we make em cross the Rio with alligators and obstacles and machine guns and shit!

Or wait, here’s my other one: hot chicks with big boobs wrasslin’ and ripping each others clothes off. Now, maybe it’s not Homeland Security-related, but importantly: tits.

A Bachelor-style contest but for fiery Latinas where you get a green-card but have to marry the incel who puts the ladies through their paces. 

14 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

So has she taken over top spot as most vile R cunt?

Man, that's one neck-in-neck race w/ a shit-ton of contestants. 

3 hours ago, HornOnTheBayou said:

 

 

how about a reality show where illegal immigrants have plastic surgery to become the most unrecognizable from their former selves? winner gets to stay with a new identity.

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Edited by Jive Turkey

20 minutes ago, Jive Turkey said:

how about a reality show where illegal immigrants have plastic surgery to become the most unrecognizable from their former selves? winner gets to stay with a new identity.

Gov-Kristi-Noem.jpg

GjWyo8PXsAAUPhg?format=jpg&name=large

Who Wants To Be A MAGA-naire?

16 hours ago, Francisco 2.0 said:

What the fuck:

The losing contestants will go home with “iconically American” prizes, including a million American Airlines points, a $10,000 Starbucks gift card, and a lifetime supply of 76 gasoline. They will also have a leg up as they undergo the traditional citizenship process.

The big winner, meanwhile, will get sworn in as an American citizen on Capitol Hill by “a top American politician or judge.”

“There won’t be a dry eye within 10 miles,” the pitch reads

Why not make it real exciting, and all those who don't win get a one way first class plane ticket a max security prison in El Salvador. 
And name the show "Play Stupid Games/Win Stupid Prizes"

2 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

So has she taken over top spot as most vile R cunt?

She's definitely in the top 750.

2 hours ago, TexArcher said:

She's definitely in the top 750.

I think you have to put them in tiers at this point. 

Tier 1: Noem, Linda McMahon, and Bondi, because of the power they hold.

Tier 2: MTG, Mace, Boebert, Ernst and any number of congress critters, state reps, state AGs, etc

Tier 3: Media whores, influencers, and other random grifters

 

10 minutes ago, Pescado_Rojo said:

I think you have to put them in tiers at this point. 

Tier 1: Noem, Linda McMahon, and Bondi, because of the power they hold.

Tier 2: MTG, Mace, Boebert, Ernst and any number of congress critters, state reps, state AGs, etc

Tier 3: Media whores, influencers, and other random grifters

 

You missed Leavitt in Tier 1 and Tulsi in Tier 2

3 minutes ago, tx ind said:

You missed Leavitt in Tier 1 and Tulsi in Tier 2

Good catch. They probably both belong in tier 1. 

On 5/15/2025 at 7:49 PM, TwiceHorn said:

“The Department of Homeland Security receives hundreds of television show pitches a year,” she said in a statement. “Each proposal undergoes a thorough vetting process prior to denial or approval.”

 

Um what?

Apparently the real quote is:

DHS Assistant Secretary Tricia McLaughlin told CNN in a statement that DHS “receives hundreds of television show pitches a year, ranging from documentaries surrounding ICE and CBP border operation to white collar investigations by HSI. Each proposal undergoes a thorough vetting process prior to denial or approval.”

Documentaries, perhaps with access to sitting DHS personnel, makes a certain amount of sense.

A fucking game show makes no sense at all.  Except with a game show host as POTUS.

On 5/15/2025 at 7:07 PM, Francisco 2.0 said:

What the fuck:

 

 

 

 

I have an idea that will surely get much higher ratings.  I present you with MAGA SAFARI

On one side we have a group of immigrants dropped into the middle of nowhere with nothing but the clothes on their backs and a $20 prepaid debit card

On the other side, we have the winners of the MAGA sweepstakes that bid for the chance to bring all their fancy pew pew pews and cool as shit tactical gear to hunt down the immigrants.  Proceeds raised from the bidding for these coveted spots go to ICE Barbie's cosplay wardrobe.

Any immigrant that survives a predetermined amount of time automatically gains legal citizenship right there on the spot.  ICE Barbie gives them their official papers with tears in her eyes.

Whichever MAGAt has the most confirmed kills wins a cash prize.

It will be amazing.

 

MAGA Safari Men: 

Kirk

Shapiro

Catturd

Pool

 

Give me $500 on the Immigrants… 

image.jpeg.fc6a8d857d49693d5af5a68b8dc3fbba.jpeg

 

 

 

On 5/16/2025 at 9:06 AM, HornOnTheBayou said:

 

 

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edit: sorry. Joke was already made by @GenXer

I mean, but still. WTF?

Edited by Dnaguy

7 minutes ago, Firemans4Horn said:

We laugh so we don’t cry

The not crying is becoming increasingly difficult.

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6 minutes ago, HenryJames said:

That answer was meant for one person.


Corey Lewandowski?

The Dunning-Kruger administration 

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You'd think that our resident libertarian would be in arms over a statement from the executive branch that habeus corpus is the right of the president to detain persons. Oh well 

Holy fuck - this bitch is stupid and evil. It’s a dangerous combination.

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30 minutes ago, hornmpa96 said:

Holy fuck - this bitch is stupid and evil. It’s a dangerous combination.

And despite all that...

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did this evil bitch really start crying when it was pointed out how stupid she was with regard to the law she's supposed to uphold??

i saw that floated a couple of places...man that would make my day. but haven't seen anything confirmed...

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6 hours ago, Firemans4Horn said:

We laugh so we don’t cry

 

 

NOEM: Why don’t you ask me about my pageant teeth I bought in Texas?

9 hours ago, Firemans4Horn said:

We laugh so we don’t cry

 

 

WTF Grok lol

Screenshot_20250520-190933.thumb.png.54dffa65ab8b32d8db894250691e3a08.png

9 hours ago, HenryJames said:

That answer was meant for one person.

She seemed pretty convinced of her answer. I think that one person told her that. 

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