July 17, 20187 yr Should I be using one? I got a promotion at work and have to email outside the company frequently. What should be on it? Name, office phone number and position is about all I’m thinking I need. Do I need to put my email address in? I trust the ballers here to steer me in the wrong direction at some point.
July 17, 20187 yr You might check with your marketing department, my company has email signature policies to standardize amongst all employees.
July 17, 20187 yr 1. Yes, you should use one. 2. Those pieces of info are correct correct. 3. No email address
July 17, 20187 yr 4 minutes ago, UnivTex34 said: You might check with your marketing department, my company has email signature policies to standardize amongst all employees. Yep mine as well but we still get dumbasses that put all sorts of stupid shit on their signature. So fucking annoying
July 17, 20187 yr Have you ever been convicted of fraud? If not, might be important to let people know that, eg Jkwellborn 512-236-1122 Assistant VP of Acquisitions Not Yet "Convicted" of Fraud!
July 17, 20187 yr One of our employees decided to sign everything Positively, Her Name Phone number Title Well our bosses decide they want to clean stuff up and they choose her to create a template for signatures company wide. Now all of them come pre-filled "positively"...weak ass shit.
July 17, 20187 yr Clever quote , or some classic quote is essential , along with a long privacy statement, a few pictures of your kids... Never understood putting your email address in a signature, it’s already in your email dick.
July 17, 20187 yr 35 minutes ago, Updawg said: Use lots of colors. and script, and different font sizes. bitches love different font sizes.
July 17, 20187 yr Be sure to include some verbiage from your legal dept. about the restricted use of any email communications. It should be at least 3 paragraphs long to be legally binding. Edited July 17, 20187 yr by bernorange
July 17, 20187 yr 3 hours ago, SimonBolivar said: One of our employees decided to sign everything Positively, Her Name Phone number Title Well our bosses decide they want to clean stuff up and they choose her to create a template for signatures company wide. Now all of them come pre-filled "positively"...weak ass shit. I'd use all that positivity to search for new employment.
July 17, 20187 yr Clever quote , or some classic quote is essential , along with a long privacy statement, a few pictures of your kids... Never understood putting your email address in a signature, it’s already in your email dick.It does actually come in handy when the email is forwarded, replied to, forwarded again, replied to again, etc. and eventually a new person is added after the various email programs have removed the actual email address because you are in their contacts list. I still don't do it but I've gotten several people's email addresses like that because they did it.
July 17, 20187 yr This email sig could be a great place to promote World Peace by explaining that Jihad is not always violent.
July 17, 20187 yr Early in my career I worked for a large contractor that ended all written communication with: Very Truly Yours Name/number etc Always thought that was weird. Very Truly Yours,BottleRocket
July 18, 20187 yr Knew a dude once who had the following after his name: "If you choose not to decide, You still have made a choice."
July 18, 20187 yr Make sure you get the shittiest quality company logo you can find and then make it at least 5 times bigger than appropriate.
July 18, 20187 yr Yep mine as well but we still get dumbasses that put all sorts of stupid shit on their signature. So fucking annoyingThis.
July 18, 20187 yr 15 hours ago, bernorange said: Be sure to include some verbiage from your legal dept. about the restricted use of any email communications. It should be at least 3 paragraphs long to be legally binding. Someday when i have the power to enact any law I want, I’m going to make it illegal to add long disclaimers at the bottom of emails or web pages. No one reads them so drop the stance there is some agreement I made or understanding just because words are at the end.
July 18, 20187 yr Author I’ve seen some pretty stupid or fucked off ones.I knew y’all wouldn’t disappoint. Maybe I should just put a link for the old shit filled site.
July 18, 20187 yr 18 hours ago, BottleRocket said: Very Truly Yours, BottleRocket Well, "Dishonestly Yours" just doesn't quite have the same cachet.
July 18, 20187 yr My favorite is the .jpg company logos that show up as attachments so that when you're looking for a document that someone sent you, every email from them has an "attachment."
July 18, 20187 yr Check to see if your company has a template that it will require you to use. If no template or requirement... IMO, the more fancy fonts, logos, links (LinkedIn, really?), sayings, quotes, etc., the more that person is trying to seem important. Players don’t need that crap. Use plain text only (easiest for multiple email clients). Full name that you use for work and any earned letters (e.g. PMP, PhD, etc.). Title or other identifier. Company Name. Office telephone number (and mobile if applicable). I agree with Huck - add email address. That’s all you need. That said, you may tailor it to your specific needs. I’ve seen account managers add a link to web-based scheduling tool for ease in scheduling meetings with customers. Some industries still use faxes, so add that number. Keep it simple.
July 19, 20187 yr Popular Post Sir Jkwellborn, Esquire, MBA, PMP, PE, PhD. jkwellborn@youporn.com 6528 N Lamar Blvd Austin, TX 78757 512-555-1235 business cell 512-555-1236 direct line 512-555-1237 main line 512-555-1238 fax 512-555-1234 personal cell 512-555-1239 home "There is no such thing as failure. Just early attempts at success." - Derka "If you give a woman a fish, she will eat for a day. If you teach a woman to fish, she will eat for a lifetime." - Famous Lesbian "No man whose testicles have been crushed or whose organ has been cut off may become a member of the Assembly of God." Deuteronomy 23:1 Edited July 19, 20187 yr by luke duke
July 19, 20187 yr 3 hours ago, Mack Tripper said: My favorite is the .jpg company logos that show up as attachments so that when you're looking for a document that someone sent you, every email from them has an "attachment." Or worse, you open it on your phone, which automatically cahces it.
July 19, 20187 yr Make sure you sign everything in a professional manner. "Up yours, truly. Prepuce O. Doom" Is a good way to show the recipient who's boss.
July 19, 20187 yr I worked with a guy that had RNG after his name in his signature. Asked him what it meant and he said "Really Nice Guy". He was a nice guy, but got laid off when a downturn came.
July 19, 20187 yr Something minor that I find really annoying is- Thanks, John Smith John Smith VP of sales XYZ company (555) 555-5555 Asshole your name is in your signature you don't need to also type it in at the end of your email.
July 19, 20187 yr three options: 1. bone with silian grail lettering 2. egg shell with roman 3. raised lettering with pale nimbus
July 20, 20187 yr On 7/18/2018 at 6:40 PM, Bill Brasky said: name title desk phone cell phone horoscope sign penis length ....
July 20, 20187 yr On 7/18/2018 at 7:04 PM, luke duke said: "If you give a woman a fish, she will eat for a day. If you teach a woman to fish, you will never get her to tie her own hooks or lures & will always have to bait her line." - ruth Bomb
July 20, 20187 yr On 7/17/2018 at 6:01 PM, BottleRocket said: Early in my career I worked for a large contractor that ended all written communication with: Very Truly Yours Name/number etc Always thought that was weird. Very Truly Yours, BottleRocket Several years ago I picked "Respectfully" as my closing prior to signature for professional emails that are formal. I don't see anyone else using it and I think it sounds good. I use "Sincerely" as an alternate depending on the message. I leave the thank you's in body of the message. Dear Bitch, Please suck my dick. Thank you! Respectfully, Elvis The King of Rock & Roll 512-212-3355 mobile elvis@sunstudios1956.com
July 21, 20187 yr Several years ago I picked "Respectfully" as my closing prior to signature for professional emails that are formal. I don't see anyone else using it and I think it sounds good. I use "Sincerely" as an alternate depending on the message. I leave the thank you's in body of the message. Dear Bitch, Please suck my dick. Thank you! Respectfully, Elvis The King of Rock & Roll 512-212-3355 mobile elvis@sunstudios1956.comWe use Respectfully at our firm. Dickbutt pic as a jpg afterwards.
July 26, 20187 yr On 7/17/2018 at 8:58 PM, Steel Shank said: Knew a dude once who had the following after his name: "If you choose not to decide, You still have made a choice." Someone is a Rush fan.
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