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Dallas Cowboys 2024 Season Thread -- Jerrah the Asshat Rides Again

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5 hours ago, futureman said:

image.thumb.png.001b1b384064a7b2eb36b2caa24656e4.png
 

jerry says you all can suck his 80-year-old cock

Put it on the wall

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    The Brian Schottenheimer hire is the Jonathan Mingo of trades, the Taco Charlton of draft picks, the Terence Steele of contract extensions, the blinding 3pm glare of stadium designs. 

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12 hours ago, Texzilla588 said:


You going to pay him $40+ mil ? He’s very good but as I said teams are figuring him out, running away from him or right over him, or exploiting his overpursuit. And his stamina for a 20 game season is dubious. I hope he becomes worthy of being the top paid non QB in history. He’s the only real tradeable huge asset they have. If they need a QB they need picks.

They aren’t trading Micah, CD, or Dak. They’ll pay them all.

7 hours ago, futureman said:

image.thumb.png.001b1b384064a7b2eb36b2caa24656e4.png
 

jerry says you all can suck his 80-year-old cock

Pretty sure he's already getting that from the dumbass fans who pay money to see this team and buy merchandise. They're even paying him for the honor.

Or maybe that's just bending them over. Potato Potahto.

They aren’t trading Micah, CD, or Dak. They’ll pay them all.

Yes they will. And ten years from now it will be the same story. Jerry 91 years old chasing that fourth ring. Team in dead cap hell. Losing with Trey Lance throwing 97 INTs a season. We’re all in cowboys Groundhog Day, a time space warp that just repeats endlessly for eternity.
56 minutes ago, Texzilla588 said:


Yes they will. And ten years from now it will be the same story. Jerry 91 years old chasing that fourth ring. Team in dead cap hell. Losing with Trey Lance throwing 97 INTs a season. We’re all in cowboys Groundhog Day, a time space warp that just repeats endlessly for eternity.

Pretty much. Dak/CD/Micah = Romo/Dez/DWare. They will give you some good regular seasons and their teams will never suck unless major injuries occur, usually to the QB. But come playoff time, that level of play decreases. Neither of those groups of teams could beat Rodgers when it mattered most.

Micah's MO seems to be rack up a lot of sacks against shitty teams, usually earlier in the season. And then fizzles out as the season goes on. And is non-existent in the playoffs. Has one single sack his entire playoff career. Could be due to the defensive coaching making him too predicable and not moving him around. He is also undersized as an edge rusher and getting beat up by big OL will take its toll and wear you down. 

1 hour ago, Vic Mackey said:

 

I mean, surely Jerry didn’t say that?  Is this real life?

1 minute ago, Pam Cummings said:

A joyous day if CD fell to you in fantasy

Not when he strains a hamstring during the opener because he’s out of shape.

Not when he strains a hamstring during the opener because he’s out of shape.
I'm pretty sure he's been working out this whole time. Training camp reps and a few drives in preseason aren't going to be some huge advantage to staying healthy.
3 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

 

Someone please take that senile old fuck out back and shoot him.

3 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

 

“I’ve done it all. So I have an ordinate amount of confidence that fuck, if anybody can figure out how to get this shit done, I can figure out how to get it done. I’ve been there every which way from Sunday, and have I busted my ass a bunch, a bunch. And there’s nobody living that’s out cutting and shooting that can’t give you a bunch of times they busted their ass. So hell no, there’s nobody that could fucking come in here and do all the contracts … and be a GM any better than I can."

 

- Jerry Jones

4 hours ago, Texzilla588 said:


Yes they will. And ten years from now it will be the same story. Jerry 91 years old chasing that fourth ring. Team in dead cap hell. Losing with Trey Lance throwing 97 INTs a season. We’re all in cowboys Groundhog Day, a time space warp that just repeats endlessly for eternity.

I’m not saying it’s a good thing, I’m just saying what I think will happen.

 

1 domino has fallen.

 

Ill point out that Dak might not be a Cowboy next season and I’ll still be technically correct if they let him walk.

1 minute ago, n64ra said:

“I’ve done it all. So I have an ordinate amount of confidence that fuck, if anybody can figure out how to get this shit done, I can figure out how to get it done. I’ve been there every which way from Sunday, and have I busted my ass a bunch, a bunch. And there’s nobody living that’s out cutting and shooting that can’t give you a bunch of times they busted their ass. So hell no, there’s nobody that could fucking come in here and do all the contracts … and be a GM any better than I can."

 

- Jerry Jones

Dios Mio…

 

John Lynch?

 

whoever is running the Chefs [sic]?

3 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

 

But let's keep blaming Micah, and CeeDee, and Dak, and other players and their contracts. The problem is Jerry and the idiots he hires as coaches, because nobody worth a shit will be a coach under a piece of shit whose only aim in life is to take credit for anything and everything. That's why we keep losing playoff games. McCarthy and his stooges were completely blindsided by Green Bay's game plan and gave up 3 td's in their first 4 possessions, oh and never adjusted, so receivers were untouched all fucking game long. That's on Mike and his morons on staff. The only reason he wasn't fired was because, again, nobody worth a shit will work for Jerry Fucking Jones. 

17 minutes ago, n64ra said:

“I’ve done it all. So I have an ordinate amount of confidence that fuck, if anybody can figure out how to get this shit done, I can figure out how to get it done. I’ve been there every which way from Sunday, and have I busted my ass a bunch, a bunch. And there’s nobody living that’s out cutting and shooting that can’t give you a bunch of times they busted their ass. So hell no, there’s nobody that could fucking come in here and do all the contracts … and be a GM any better than I can."

 

- Jerry Jones

This is from The Onion, right? Babylon Bee?

But let's keep blaming Micah, and CeeDee, and Dak, and other players and their contracts. The problem is Jerry and the idiots he hires as coaches, because nobody worth a shit will be a coach under a piece of shit whose only aim in life is to take credit for anything and everything. That's why we keep losing playoff games. McCarthy and his stooges were completely blindsided by Green Bay's game plan and gave up 3 td's in their first 4 possessions, oh and never adjusted, so receivers were untouched all fucking game long. That's on Mike and his morons on staff. The only reason he wasn't fired was because, again, nobody worth a shit will work for Jerry Fucking Jones. 

That would be on coach 28-3 running the defense.

The offensive ineptitude would be on fat Mike, and Dak.
1 hour ago, futureman said:

the best in years!  sounds like Zeke. 

Dalvin Cook is a better runner than Zeke. No question in my mind.

 

 

is that saying much? Nope.

Edited by lilMAC25

2 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

Super Bowl!!09cef9b329b533d75995c55a7a1171f9.jpg


At this point is there even any downside? If he passes all of the physicals, sure why not. 


At this point is there even any downside? If he passes all of the physicals, sure why not. 

When you have zek as your #1, and you see hershel walker in the stands and think he may be a better choice.
9 hours ago, Rex Kramer said:

I was told this opinion was incorrect by @lilMAC25 who has yet to respond to my post about it. 

2. MICAH PARSONS, DALLAS COWBOYS: 92.4

Sacks Hits Hurries Total Pressures Win Rate Pressure Rate
16 19 71 106 24.2% 21.5%

Parsons excels at getting into the backfield. He has 14-plus sacks in each of his three NFL seasons and has recorded more than 100 total pressures in two consecutive campaigns. Parsons led all edge rushers in pressure rate and pass-rushing productivity (12.6) in 2023 while finishing second in pass-rush win rate.
 

https://www.pff.com/news/nfl-highest-graded-interior-edge-defenders-2023-nfl-season

12 minutes ago, Rex Kramer said:

Factually incorrect numbers, and you addressed maybe 10% of my post. 

Take it up with PFF.

 

and you’re not top5 pressure, win rate, and pressure rating if you’re completely disappearing against “the good teams”.

 

 

PFF, FoxSports, CBSSports, etc have Parsons as top 4 pass rusher IN THE NFL.

Edited by lilMAC25


2. MICAH PARSONSDALLAS COWBOYS: 92.4

Sacks Hits Hurries Total Pressures Win Rate Pressure Rate
16 19 71 106 24.2% 21.5%

Parsons excels at getting into the backfield. He has 14-plus sacks in each of his three NFL seasons and has recorded more than 100 total pressures in two consecutive campaigns. Parsons led all edge rushers in pressure rate and pass-rushing productivity (12.6) in 2023 while finishing second in pass-rush win rate.
 

https://www.pff.com/news/nfl-highest-graded-interior-edge-defenders-2023-nfl-season


This doesn’t address the chief criticism on him, which is losing stamina in the later part of the season. You’d have to look at his weekly stats. The other is simply cap management; can you afford to keep him?
4 minutes ago, Texzilla588 said:


This doesn’t address the chief criticism on him, which is losing stamina in the later part of the season. You’d have to look at his weekly stats. The other is simply cap management; can you afford to keep him?

The first half seems like a usage issue, not a Parsons’ issue.

 

The second half is a management issues, not a Parsons’ issue.

 

Trading a top 5 pass rusher in a league where defending the pass is CRUCIAL to team success in the league is more than a “risky” move.

Edited by lilMAC25

Dak has so much leverage over Jerry Jones now. When Jerry Jones has the leverage he uses it. I hope Dak returns that favor, honestly.

 

And no, this isn't some "pro Dak" stance. This is a "fuck that billionaire idiot" stance. Although in typical fashion.....he probably wants this, as it will bring more attention and money for him.

Edited by Pam Cummings

There will be veteran running backs available soon. Perine is going to get release by Denver and there might be a few others available soon as well. 

Dak has so much leverage over Jerry Jones now. When Jerry Jones has the leverage he uses it. I hope Dak returns that favor, honestly.
 
And no, this isn't some "pro Dak" stance. This is a "fuck that billionaire idiot" stance. Although in typical fashion.....he probably wants this, as it will bring more attention and money for him.

Dak’s agent no doubt wants him to push off a contract unless it’s stupid rich to put him on the open market in 2025. Also if staying Dak should want to know who his coaches are going to be, another problem with Jerry’s treatment of coaching contracts.

Guys none of this shit matters. We aren’t making the playoffs lol 

losing dak to free agency is the last shred of hope this franchise has left.  period. 

Dallas isn't signing CD to a big deal without knowing who the QB will be. It obviously isn't that bum Lance. Rush is a solid backup but that's it.

Dak will be retained, just a matter of when now.

1 hour ago, Vic Mackey said:

Dallas isn't signing CD to a big deal without knowing who the QB will be. It obviously isn't that bum Lance. Rush is a solid backup but that's it.

Dak will be retained, just a matter of when now.

Idk, the vikings did it with Jefferson.  I think this year will determine Daks future.  Could have Quinn MF Ewers throwing to him next year. 

Edited by EvilCaseMcCoy

Most notable cuts so far are Tyron Billy-Johnson, Peyton Hendershot, and Eric Scott. Saw articles suggesting all of those guys might make the team.

Chiefs cut our old buddy Kelvin Joseph.

1 hour ago, Rex Kramer said:

Watt

Remember when we coulda had TJ Watt instead of Taco?

3 hours ago, EvilCaseMcCoy said:

Idk, the vikings did it with Jefferson.  I think this year will determine Daks future.  Could have Quinn MF Ewers throwing to him next year

I'll take that deal over Dak any day. Evers is smart. Fucking Dak.... He's also accurate, just like a young Troy Aikman. Aikman fucking rocked almost immediately (yeah, I know. That first year was more like rocky... but there was never any doubt that he was gonna be great.). Imagine old Jer' shuffling off to Buffalo about the same time. New, non-barnyard coach? Get some excitement back into the mix.

The team probably needs to take a bath this year. Get some very high draft pics. Another good reason for dumping Dak. The sooner he's a bad memory, the better.

Edited by Irish Wrist Watch

3 hours ago, EvilCaseMcCoy said:

Idk, the vikings did it with Jefferson.  I think this year will determine Daks future.  Could have Quinn MF Ewers throwing to him next year. 

And that's why the Vikings now have Sam Darnold throwing to Jefferson. And they drafted that spare McCarthy. Both of these guys are huge steps down from Cousins. Yes, Cousins never won anything of value but he's much better than what they decided to replace him with. Extending these WRs to big deals is a waste if your QB situation is unknown. 

Jerry will sign Dak. Not sure when, but it will happen at some point. Can't remember the last QB Jerry drafted with intentions of being the guy. Romo and Dak were never supposed to start. This franchise doesn't use high draft picks on QBs.

Most notable cuts so far are Tyron Billy-Johnson, Peyton Hendershot, and Eric Scott. Saw articles suggesting all of those guys might make the team.
Chiefs cut our old buddy Kelvin Joseph.

Hendershot traded to KC for a 7th.

I had lost track of ol’ YKDV Bossman Fat, who somehow couldn’t remember one of his crew shooting a dude from a car he was riding in. 3rd team since getting the boot in Dallas. A fucking waste of a 2.
2 hours ago, EvilCaseMcCoy said:

Remember when we coulda had TJ Watt instead of Taco?

Watt was not a scheme fit.  Jerry made the correct pick in taking Taco. 

Any word on Dalvin Cook? Internet said there was talks? EE doesn’t get me excited, knowing that in his last “contract year” with the Boys, he showed up to Fall Camp FAT!!!

Hook’em!!!

Cook prob wants 2nd year leading rusher in nfl money when he deserves league minimum and unlimited whataburger coupons 

Edited by Sgt Hulk

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