Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Featured Replies

A man will go places with a hardon where he wouldn't go with a machine gun.

-unknown

Lord, we give you curly, try not to piss him off - Cookie

“Three things can happen when you pass, and two of ‘em are bad.”

Darrell Royal

15 hours ago, TexasBeta said:

“Three things can happen when you pass, and two of ‘em are bad.”

Darrell Royal
 

Coach Royal had a lot of them:

"Hell no, I'm not going to candy this up.  These are works clothes "- On changing our uniforms.

(TCU) is like a bunch of cockroaches. It’s not what they eat and tote off, it’s what they fall into and mess up that hurts.

And this one from James Street.    Always liked the counter subconscious subterfuge....

"Randy, I'm talking to you. I'm looking at Cotton but I'm talking to you!"
-- James Street to Randy Peschel (but pointing at Cotton Speyrer in emphasis) in the huddle before the 4th and 3rd play against Arkansas in 1969. Street had noticed the Arkansas players looking into the huddle all afternoon

Never assume. When you assume you make a asshole, out of yo-self.

-Cleon Slamming Salmon

"We have a given problem to solve. To refuse to deal with it at all merely amounts to dealing with it badly.  If we undertake the solution, there is, of course, always danger that we may not solve it aright; but to refuse to undertake the solution simply renders it certain that we cannot possibly solve it aright."  President Teddy Roosevelt

And if you have not read his "The Strenuous Life" speech given in 1899, it should be must reading.

Edited by Lidig8r

On August 3, 2018 at 1:59 PM, jimmyjazz said:

Ah, I didn't realize the extent to which you were aiming for the profane, odd, or obscure.

Best quote I've heard about being born with a silver spoon in one's mouth (and it gets thrown around a lot lately):

 

"Donald Trump was born in the owner's box and thinks he invented the game."  - WhatTheBuck

I thought it was something like "Donald Trump was born on Third Base and thus thinks it okay to finger Ivanka."  

Edited by Lobo

On August 3, 2018 at 2:22 PM, 52-80 said:

"fool me once, shame on you.  fool me twice, well... uh.... you cant fool me again"

-barack obama

Can't say I'm familiar with that one. That would be quite a coincidence. It sounds like a misquote and a misattribution. 

 

I'm pretty sure anything Mark Twain ever put to paper is quote worthy. Hell, I suspect his farts were quotable. 

Information is not knowledge
Knowledge is not wisdom
Wisdom is not truth
Truth is not beauty
Beauty is not love
Love is not music
Music is THE BEST

- Frank Zappa

Leadership is achieving success through the hard work of others. 

 

-my uncle 

On 8/3/2018 at 11:15 AM, Quagmire said:

If there’s fluff on he muff she’s old enough

If she's old enough to crawl she's already in the right position.

-sandusky

"Remember to eat a green thing everyday."

                                           -Liquor Store Clerk- Dazed and Confused

We're ready

       - Darrell Royal (Cotton Bowl, 1/1/1963)

12 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father, prepare to die.

Inigo Montoya

So close, but you forgot the initial greeting.

Hello, ....

which eventually gets raised to exclaimation when being repeated to Count Rugen:

Hello! ....

until the entire line is:

HELLO!  MY NAME IS INIGO MONTOYA!  YOU KILLED MY FATHER, PREPARE TO DIE!

2 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

If she's old enough to crawl she's already in the right position.

-sandusky

He, not she......

  • Author

"No good deed goes unpunished." --Clare Boothe Luce

It is easier to pass a camel thru the eye of a needle if it is lightly greased. - Kellogg Albran from "The Profit"

On 8/3/2018 at 7:59 PM, jimmyjazz said:

Ah, I didn't realize the extent to which you were aiming for the profane, odd, or obscure.

Best quote I've heard about being born with a silver spoon in one's mouth (and it gets thrown around a lot lately):

 

Thats pearl jam broseph.

If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with- Stephen Stills

On 8/5/2018 at 11:21 AM, Lidig8r said:

"We have a given problem to solve. To refuse to deal with it at all merely amounts to dealing with it badly.  If we undertake the solution, there is, of course, always danger that we may not solve it aright; but to refuse to undertake the solution simply renders it certain that we cannot possibly solve it aright."  President Teddy Roosevelt

If there was a problem, yo, I'll solve it."  Vanilla Ice

"I never met a man I didn't like." Will Rogers.

3 hours ago, Gil Bang said:

If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with- Stephen Stills

I've always hated that line.

On ‎8‎/‎4‎/‎2018 at 3:54 PM, Surly Bevo said:

Patriotism is supporting your country all the time, and your government when it deserves it - Mark Twain

I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly. - Winston Churchill
 

It don't make a shit - Super Bill Bradley

If it flies, floats or fucks...rent it - Various sources

My avatar has too many to give, but that is one of my favorites.  A few others:

"Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few."

"I have taken more good from alcohol than alcohol has taken from me."

"If Hitler invaded Hell, I would make at least a favorable reference to the devil in the House of Commons."

Then there's the story with his famous retort to Nancy Astor:

"Winston, if you were my husband I would put poison in your drink."  Churchill replied, "If I were your wife, I'd drink it."


"Winston, if you were my husband I would put poison in your drink."  Churchill replied, "If I were your wife, I'd drink it."

I never knew Winston was LGTBQ

"It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into."  - Jonathan Swift

"Who's gonna clean up all these damn roses"

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate.

 

And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it

4 hours ago, 52-80 said:

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate.

 

And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it

If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone.

"Dance with the one that brung ya."

Darrell Royal (and many others but the only one that matters)

"Day breaks but don't never fall.....

Night falls but don't never break"

                                         Dr. John

 

  • Author

"This is the first time Texas became hip... Lead bass and drums. The only thing that had been even close to this was the Jeff Beck group. Listen, it sounds like Jeff Beck. But Jeff was just stealing old black guys' stuff. Listen to that ZZ Top bass player. He knows barbecue sauce."

David Lee Roth, Crazy From the Heat

If I'm here and you're here, doesn't that make it our time?

-spicoli

Edited by Twizzler

HL Mencken is another gold mine.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.

Puritanism: The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.