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Carpetbagging weasel faced smarmy little bitch, Ted Cruz

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#2901
5 hours ago, Red Five said:

Hmm. I'm not all that attracted to Kate McKinnon, and I'm definitely not attracted to Conway. But McKinnon as Conway kind of does it for me. Weird. 

Not weird at all, and thank you.

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  • Wow I didn’t know that, not to be rude but is there a source on that?  I cannot imagine living with a national public figure for a parent, who not only spreads that hate to a huge audience but is also

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    atomheartbevo

    https://www.yahoo.com/news/ruben-gallego-hurls-expletives-ted-002927543.html Rep. Ruben Gallego hurled profanity at Sen. Ted Cruz after the Texas Republican worried that Democrats and the media w

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#2902
19 minutes ago, PenelopeWitherspoon said:
3 hours ago, Beau Vine said:
I'll bet Kate is freaky in bed.  

You don't have the right parts for her. I on the other hand...

Obligatory:  Go on... 

#2906

It’s kinda funny when you consider how many people have come inside his wife’s Birthing People Hole.  

#2907
5 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

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This is fucking stupid considering how many people are adopted or consider people who did not give birth them their mothers, as the woman who gave birth to them, could not or would not, care for them.

Edited by Jhawkmvp

#2908
This is fucking stupid considering how many people are adopted or consider people who did not give birth them their mothers, as the woman who gave birth to them, could not or would not, care for them.
But just imagine how owned those cancel culture socialists feel right now.
#2910

happy fled to mexico while 200 of the people you're elected to serve froze to death day, asshole

Edited by elfenix

#2911

Don't you love how a black woman's testimony in a hearing discussing the maternal health crisis among black people in which a single sentence is taken out of context becomes the latest grievance instead of focusing on the *checks notes* systemic differences in attitudes and care in healthcare towards minority populations? That minority populations are three times more likely to have complications or fatalities during childbirth?

Pro life? Sure Ted.

#2912
8 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

In fairness, he’s saying it should be Mother’s Day.  In double fairness, though, he’s also perhaps overly protective of mothers because his father was a cold blooded murderer.

But I’ve not seen or heard it called otherwise? 

#2913
11 minutes ago, Js1 said:

But I’ve not seen or heard it called otherwise? 

They just make up shit to be offended by since there they cannot argue with competency.  War on Christmas!  Traditional Family Values brought to you by Newt, Trump, and company.

#2915
20 minutes ago, Red Five said:

Am I the only one confused? Is there a war on mother's day I'm unfamiliar with?

They're basically bitching about people not beating trans people to death.

#2917
2 hours ago, wildcat09 said:

They're basically bitching about people not beating trans people to death.

That is their form of unity.  

#2921
I'm not clicking that anal-warts-infested link. Do you have a TLDR?
Ted Cruz said a bunch of lies and every accusation is a confession.

Seriously imagine Cruz accusing the left of everything Rs are guilty of and you have the gist.
#2922
3 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

I'm not clicking that anal-warts-infested link. Do you have a TLDR?

"Ted Cruz is a good guy" is what made me quit reading.

#2926
1 hour ago, Gil Bang said:

this motherfucker needs his ass beat

 

 

I'd love to get that chance. I'd give him the first swing. You know that fat pussy is soft as Charmin. He can't hide in Gym Jordan's skirt every time. And I haven't been in a scrap since 6th grade, so its not like I'm some bad ass. Probably my least favorite GOP twat, including the entire Trump clan.

Edited by Blotto

#2928

Klobs would love to meet Ted in the Senate tunnels and feed him that phone. 

#2929

She would have him quivering and pissing his pants just with her words before she beats his fat ass with a salad fork.

#2930
20 minutes ago, Bama Chick said:

She would have him quivering and pissing his pants just with her words before she beats his fat ass with a salad fork.

You're not wrong. He has a lot of insecurities. He tried being an asshole, but now he is going for indifferent and nonchalant and it isn't working. He's not stupid and is smart enough to recognize his many frailties. That arrogance is a huge facade. One on one and he would collapse like a child's inflatable.

#2933

It sounds like a waste of time and money to Dan Patrick until he finds out one of the tigers tried to have an abortion. 

Now we'll see some bills passed.  

 

#2935
5 minutes ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

Ms Baskin's appeal to Senator Cruz is in vain. His m.o. would be to lock Snowflake out of the house and head for Bengal.

fify

#2938
On 5/11/2021 at 6:14 PM, MissingInAction said:

AOC would give that blimp the pegging of a life time.

Now this is something I might actually consider. As long as I got a taste of that sweet jelly roll.

’Cause you got to admit, that sweet, sweet, jelly’s so good.

 

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#2939
1 hour ago, Pancho said:

Didn’t this nigga run to Mexico during the deathly ice storms?

 

We actually do have a crisis of Canucks coming south across the border Ted.  Just look in the mirror. 

#2940
2 minutes ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

We actually do have a crisis of Canucks coming south across the border Ted.  Just look in the mirror. 

I personally want to see the long form birth certificate for old Cancun Cruz. Why does he refuse to release it?

#2941
1 hour ago, JimmyJames said:

I personally want to see the long form birth certificate for old Cancun Cruz. Why does he refuse to release it?

Because it is a hatching not a live birth. Lizard people should've told you.

#2942
1 hour ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

Because it is a hatching not a live birth. Lizard people should've told you.

Well I for one am not going to rest until I see Rafael Cruz’s long form birth certificate which proves he was born in the United States of America goddamit. Excuse my French. Tired of illegitimate presidents. 
 

This will not be the last time you heard this from me. I promise that. 

#2943
3 hours ago, JimmyJames said:

Excuse my French.

rafael tedward cruz's birth certificate probably has french on it.

#2946

Republicans are clearly struggling to blame anything on President Joe Biden, Jimmy Kimmel said on Thursday.

Their newest complaint focuses on a shortage of dipping sauces at Chick-fil-A, which has limited sauce packets to one per customer as a result. That, Kimmel said, prompted a complaint from “Texas’ top Chick-fil-A-hole,” Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas):

“Right, he’s killing us one zesty buffalo at a time,” Kimmel cracked. “Poor Ted Cruz, he’s still looking for something to distract us from fleeing to Cancun.”

 

 

#2950

someone on (reddit?) mentioned there was a shortage of food safe adhesive due to (drumroll) the texas freeze, which shut down chemical plants making that stuff on the ship channel.  which ted fled from. 

(citation needed)

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