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Featured Replies

2 hours ago, closetojumping said:

He would have had to have a hell of a time if he did, I know that much. 

CTJ's wife does anal...confirmed

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  • Have the deportations started? 

  • TreatyOak
    TreatyOak

    Can someone please alert Immamac that recent site update keeps opening the Johntay Cook is Dismissed from the team thread on BurnOrange&White's computer and forcing him to post on it?  

  • Theft? At least the cops didn't have to tell him to drop it.

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3 minutes ago, Beau Vine said:

Then you should go to a FF concert, because they went for 2:50 when I saw them last summer.

Not Taylor Swift's standard. Three full or go home. Bet their pee chart was dark-colored.

17 minutes ago, TreatyOak said:

I like rock and roll and I don't particularly like Taylor Swift's music, but I respect what she does and Dave Grohl is giving embarrassing aging rock star vibes. 

Mine are just aging dad and washed-up professor vibes, so I'd probably trade places.

1 minute ago, TheAuditor said:

This is top notch Wednesday offseason thread work.  Congrats to all.  

We've got some hours to kill before weekend baseball and softball, that's for sure.

1 hour ago, ztejas said:

 

Nah, that’s definitely Nickleback and Creed that everyone pretends to hate.
 

 
 

 

Edited by Not a Sock

1 hour ago, Helobious said:

If there was ever a song to be played in a car on a highway with no speed limit it’s My Hero by Foo Fighters. Maybe Be Quiet and Drive by Deftones is up there too

 

4 minutes ago, Not a Sock said:

Nah, that’s definitely Nickleback and Creed that everyone pretends to hate.
 

 
 

 

No because those bands I think everyone kind of ironically likes since they've been hated for so long. 

That clip is perfect for The Foo Fighters. Shit like this just furthers the point because this is a great song:

4 minutes ago, Beau Vine said:

 

 

26 minutes ago, nnm said:

u8hH-_.gif

 

Whatever you do, don't tell @TreatyOakwhat this song is REALLY about.

 

4 minutes ago, hookemATL said:

Johntay Cook is the Dave Grohl of Taylor Swifts. 

Star Trek Bones GIF

37 minutes ago, Hayduke said:

Pffft. Johntay's a derailment, and this thread is a derailment of a derailment. Surly is the Land of Infinite Derailment.

And just as well, because a discussion of rockstars and CTJ's wife is way better than beating Johntay's pedestrian flameout to death some more. As a participant myself, I am torn between wanting him to succeed and hypocritically waiting for him to make things worse.

Then I say you have to prove it with a better rockstar story than CTJ, or at least some remotely related but surpassingly embarrassing yarn about somebody

 

I vote "aye."

I actually have a more absurd rock star story regarding my wife than the one told here. Rimbo couldn’t top it without making shit up. 

Also, when I was at Texas, I partied one night with Gwen Stefani right before she became famous as the lead singer of No Doubt, which tops the other one or whatever Rimbo would try to make up. 

All fun, but that will be that for the public football board. 

2 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I actually have a more absurd rock star story regarding my wife than the one told here. Rimbo couldn’t top it without making shit up. 

Also, when I was at Texas, I partied one night with Gwen Stefani right before she became famous as the lead singer of No Doubt, which tops the other one or whatever Rimbo would try to make up. 

All fun, but that will be that for the public football board. 

I have only two "rock star" stories and both are lame; the time I randomly bothered Eric Clapton at the Four Seasons, and the time I (a white guy) was mistaken for Lenny Kravitz. 

Oh wait, I've got a third, when I got kissed by DJ Rap. 10/10 would get kissed by English Girls Named Cherise again. 

Point is to concede the point. I'm the most famous person in my own mind anyway. Apparently there's a message board out there somewhere where Rimbo became a verb, i.e. to Rimbo something up. 

Still less embarrassing than being a Greg Davis defender.

I didn’t realize Gwen Stefani is 55 years old and NO doubt was formed in  1986. I mostly associate them with the 2000’s.

  • Popular Post
21 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Also, when I was at Texas, I partied one night with Gwen Stefani right before she became famous as the lead singer of No Doubt, which tops the other one or whatever Rimbo would try to make up. 

Talk about overrated, both vocals and looks. Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

10 minutes ago, South Austin said:

Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

seven and nine bullshit. 

27 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I actually have a more absurd rock star story regarding my wife than the one told here. Rimbo couldn’t top it without making shit up. 

Also, when I was at Texas, I partied one night with Gwen Stefani right before she became famous as the lead singer of No Doubt, which tops the other one or whatever Rimbo would try to make up. 

All fun, but that will be that for the public football board. 

I'd rather see stuff sooner instead of later, but I guess either way it's too long until the annual family Christmas disaster thread.

4 minutes ago, South Austin said:

Talk about overrated, both vocals and looks. Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

Calling her ugly and a crappy singer would be one thing, but Fisher? Beyond cruel. Man, it's like she ditched you for CTJ or something.

I hadn't clicked this since the beginning of April. Holy shit. 

Some psychosis running rampant in this one

34 minutes ago, South Austin said:

Talk about overrated, both vocals and looks. Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

And I still don't know what a hollaback girl is

15 minutes ago, Hermanator said:

Some psychosis

PSYCHOSIS SUMMER 2k25!!!

LETS ALL SHIT ON A PINEAPPLE AND MAKE A BLOOD SACRIFICE TO THE ONE TRUE GOD….BEVO

Soccer Mascot GIF by Texas Longhorns

41 minutes ago, South Austin said:

Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

Interesting. I'll go with Steven Tyler. Some initial success, and then decades of just absolute garbage. 

6 minutes ago, FunkSoulBrother said:

And I still don't know what a hollaback girl is

It’s a young woman with spina bifida, you insensitive clod. 

48 minutes ago, South Austin said:

Talk about overrated, both vocals and looks. Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

She attended Cal State Fullerton, where she was...below average looking.

6 minutes ago, Red Five said:

Interesting. I'll go with Steven Tyler. Some initial success, and then decades of just absolute garbage. 

Oh, you can fuck right off.  Steven is a motherfucking STAR.  One of the greatest frontmen ever. 

@Rimbo, I worked out next to Krist Novoselic at the Sunset Marquis in West Hollywood in '90's. Just saying. 

3 hours ago, Genco said:

Treaty Oak is hosting book club this week and hit the Franzia hard.

 Franzia? @gofuckyourself I only drink Thunderbird. 

14 minutes ago, Gil Bang said:

Oh, you can fuck right off.  Steven is a motherfucking STAR.  One of the greatest frontmen ever. 

That's great. He hasn't made a listenable song in probably 35 years. 

I have had funny and weird celebrity encounters. I once took turns with my first daughter and a man and his son at a tire swing at the playground at 70th Street in Central Park on the East Side. We talked for around 30 minutes. He had a hat pulled low and sunglasses. After a while, he suggested our children share the swing at the same time. My daughter had stranger-danger and didn't want to, which hurt his feelings, cause his son was half-black and I think he thought that was the reason she said no. It wasn't. 

We had a very boring conversation, in which I blathered on about the upgrades to the playground. Finally, he and his son moved away. My wife walked over to me and said, "Hey, guess what? Robert Dinero is at the playground!" I looked over and of course, that was the man I had been hanging with, haha, without knowing who he was. 

I will say that I was really impressed with him, cause people would walk over to tell him how much they liked his movies and he would take their hand and look them in the eye, and tell them how much that meant to him. He was so cool.

Caught some of Gwen Stefani this past weekend on accident while sitting on the beach as she was performing at the Grand Wailea for some software company conference (this is a yearly thing here for washed up artists), confirmed trash. Still would though.

Edited by Hank_Hill

28 minutes ago, TreatyOak said:

I have had funny and weird celebrity encounters. I once took turns with my first daughter and a man and his son at a tire swing at the playground at 70th Street in Central Park on the East Side. We talked for around 30 minutes. He had a hat pulled low and sunglasses. After a while, he suggested our children share the swing at the same time. My daughter had stranger-danger and didn't want to, which hurt his feelings, cause his son was half-black and I think he thought that was the reason she said no. It wasn't. 

We had a very boring conversation, in which I blathered on about the upgrades to the playground. Finally, he and his son moved away. My wife walked over to me and said, "Hey, guess what? Robert Dinero is at the playground!" I looked over and of course, that was the man I had been hanging with, haha, without knowing who he was. 

I will say that I was really impressed with him, cause people would walk over to tell him how much they liked his movies and he would take their hand and look them in the eye, and tell them how much that meant to him. He was so cool.

DeNiro and I literally bumped into each other near the cashier at Aria, both looking at our phones. He was doing a junket for Last Vegas and I was in town for an annual trip with my buddies. He was nice enough, but good lord, he was small. I’m guessing 5’7”, 170 pounds. 

3 hours ago, Vito Andolini said:

I was wondering why Johntay Cook was suddenly on everyone’s lips typing fingers and instead find 65 year old dudes white knighting for Taylor Fucking Swift. What in the fuck. 

This 80 year old dude has read every word of it too.

7 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

DeNiro and I literally bumped into each other near the cashier at Aria, both looking at our phones. He was doing a junket for Last Vegas and I was in town for an annual trip with my buddies. He was nice enough, but good lord, he was small. I’m guessing 5’7”, 170 pounds. 

Most of them are. Daniel Radcliffe, Joseph Gordon Levitt, and Ben Stiller all looked like Oompah Loompas when I saw them in person.

Made it even more surprising when I saw Neil Patrick Harris and he is a legit 6' and definitely doesn't skip a gym day. Dude was yoked.

12 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

DeNiro and I literally bumped into each other near the cashier at Aria, both looking at our phones. He was doing a junket for Last Vegas and I was in town for an annual trip with my buddies. He was nice enough, but good lord, he was small. I’m guessing 5’7”, 170 pounds. 

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9 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

DeNiro and I literally bumped into each other near the cashier at Aria, both looking at our phones. He was doing a junket for Last Vegas and I was in town for an annual trip with my buddies. He was nice enough, but good lord, he was small. I’m guessing 5’7”, 170 pounds. 

I once accidentally stepped on Walter Cronkite’s foot at the old Mueller Airport, and another time literally bumped into Ted Kennedy at my school in Mexico.
Both incidents were in the early 1960s.

Saw Ed McMahon walking out of the MGM Grand Las Vegas to his limo 25 years ago. I wasn’t quick enough to rush over and bump into him though.

you fart and people forget about it after a while, but if you shit your pants people talk about it for years

Had a coworker did that years ago. We still talk about it.
Ha. I wasn’t on the trip. It was more comical than anything. They had to ask him who he was once he made the pass. Must have been deflating. 

That’s the story they’re telling you , huh?
6 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

DeNiro and I literally bumped into each other near the cashier at Aria, both looking at our phones. He was doing a junket for Last Vegas and I was in town for an annual trip with my buddies. He was nice enough, but good lord, he was small. I’m guessing 5’7”, 170 pounds. 

That's a very good one. I had the same impression.  

Few more:

  • Recording Kathleen Turner for Burger King. Bet you didn't know she was the BK voice for a couple of years. Yeah, it was a phone-patch, big deal. Sultriest voice ever. 
  • Shared a seat next to Patrick Dempsey on flight to LA and didn't know what movies he was in, haha. Guessed wrong, twice, lol. 
  • Al Pacino getting interviewed next to us at Shutters on the Beach in Santa Monica. Our smokin' hot producer wanted to pay me $20 to go over and do my laughably horrible Michael Corleone impression. "Don't tell me about my business, Kate." Sanity prevailed and I didn't do it.  


 

Talk about overrated, both vocals and looks. Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

Man, that shit is bananas.
12 minutes ago, GreenspointTexas said:

This thread sucks

Does this help? 

Jenn-Loss.jpg

The past few pages have been quite engaging and we have all learned a lot.

  • Foo Fighters suck; Foo Fighters are great
  • Everyone hates Creed and Nickelback
  • Taylor Hawkins was hitting on CTJ's wife
  • CTJ may or may not be eskimo brothers with Blake Shelton
  • Taylor Swift is a very entertaining and plays long concerts
  • Robert DeNiro is short - and a nice guy
  • Treaty was seduced by Kathleen Turner's voice - don't google for pics of her today.

I've had few brushes with fame.

  • Sat next to Art Shell and Joe Bugel on a plane when they were leaving Austin after visiting to assess Blake Brockermeyer.  Shell said about 5 words to me.  Bugel talked the entire time.
  • Saw an extremely attractive woman walking through Austin airport at 6:15a one morning.  Looked a little to the left and see Colt McCoy.  McCoy's wife is more attractive in person.

Dear Johntay (or associated agent),
Please publish at least one update per week, so Surly can be entertained.
Love,
Surly-ites

Edited by boilerhorn

3 hours ago, Rimbo said:

I'm the motherfucking Godspeed You Black Emperor of thread derails.

 

fify

Edited by Celery Man

13 minutes ago, Celery Man said:

fify

No no no, I said what I meant. 

Emperor_of_Mankind_by_genzoman.jpg

we're basically the same person

Well, I played 9 holes with Charley Pride once. Helluva nice guy and a pretty good golfer. 

Scoreboard

4 hours ago, Red Five said:

Learn to Fly is pretty good.

I heard it was inspired by a threesome their drummer had in Cabo with some married chick and her friend.

I head that "There goes my hero" was actually written by a married chick and her friend after a night to remember. 

2 hours ago, South Austin said:

Talk about overrated, both vocals and looks. Gwen Stefani is the Jeff Fisher of rock stars.

Yes yes... Gwen at 55 looks like an old worn out piece of leather compared to the 55 year olds that you are pulling these days.

Holy shit I didn't realize that was a turd I dropped in the punch bowl.

For the dim-witted among us, I wasn't referring to Grohl's pseudo-feud with his friend Taylor Swift.  I was referring to his image as one of the "good guys" of rock being permanently tarnished by his affair and how he handled it.  It was pretty off-handed, but leave it to surly to go batshit crazy.

I hung out with Troy Aikman in his first year in Dallas. 
 

We stood next to each other at the urinals in Campisi’s by SMU. 

9 minutes ago, nnm said:

I hung out with Troy Aikman in his first year in Dallas. 
 

We stood next to each other at the urinals in Campisi’s by SMU. 

Did you comment on his cock? “Heeeeyyyy, niiiice cock.”

28 minutes ago, nnm said:

I hung out with Troy Aikman in his first year in Dallas. 
 

We stood next to each other at the urinals in Campisi’s by SMU. 

 

IMG_9506.gif

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