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On what subject should you be considered Surly's resident expert?

Featured Replies

1 minute ago, closetohumping said:

SoCal

tech sales

masterbaiting

Got to admire a man who is good at fishing...

I'm curious if I'm the highest-ranked Foosball player on Surly. I'm a complete liability against a player of any real skill, but I do carry a national ranking and i'd never lose the table in a bar or gameroom.

Cardiac rhythm management.

 

I would say Old Fashioned's as well, but I know there is way too much competition in this crowd.

On 1/5/2025 at 11:00 AM, RDCanecutter said:

Whacking off.

Well I never went blind but my vision is getting blurry.

Cardiac rhythm management.
 
I would say Old Fashioned's as well, but I know there is way too much competition in this crowd.

Harmonic balance manager or interventional management?
  • Popular Post

I bet a lot of us are experts on the Ellis County Jail, because many of of us have probably had the experience of some cold, late December night at 2am,  when some toothless, inbred, goat fucker climbed onto a table and proudly told the patrons of the Waxahachie Waffle House #1347 that Dean Martin sang a better cover of “A Marshmallow World” than Johnny Fucking Mathis, and rest-in-peace Dino, but by the Gods we were not going to let that sister-fucker (probably named Cleetus) besmirch the good name of Texas-born Johnny Mathis by claiming that fucking Italian did it better when he didn’t have the range and just phoned it in on the version he released three years after Johnny released The One True Version, leading us to explain to the police at 2:15 am why the EMTs were having to haul that unconscious trash off to the hospital, and they were not accepting the YouTube video of Johnny that we played for them on our phone.

 

Edited by atomheartbevo
Grammar

5 minutes ago, atomheartbevo said:

I bet a lot of us are experts on the Ellis County Jail, because many of of us have probably had the experience of some cold, late December night at 2am,  when some toothless, inbred, goat fucker climbed onto a table and proudly told the patrons of the Waxahachie Waffle House #1347 that Dean Martin sang a better cover of “A Marshmallow World” than Johnny Fucking Mathis, and rest-in-peace Dino, but by the Gods we were not going to let that sister-fucker besmirch the good name of Texas-born Johnny Mathis by claiming that fucking Italian did it better when he didn’t have the range and just phoned it in on version he released three years after Johnny released The One True Version, leading us to explain to the police at 2:15 am why the EMTs were having to haul that unconscious trash off to the hospital, and their not excepting the YouTube video of Johnny that we played for them on our phone.

Oddly specific.

9 hours ago, Herbie Hancock said:


Harmonic balance manager or interventional management?

Interventional.  The paycheck is better than just thinking calming thoughts.

8 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

I bet a lot of us are experts on the Ellis County Jail, because many of of us have probably had the experience of some cold, late December night at 2am,  when some toothless, inbred, goat fucker climbed onto a table and proudly told the patrons of the Waxahachie Waffle House #1347 that Dean Martin sang a better cover of “A Marshmallow World” than Johnny Fucking Mathis, and rest-in-peace Dino, but by the Gods we were not going to let that sister-fucker besmirch the good name of Texas-born Johnny Mathis by claiming that fucking Italian did it better when he didn’t have the range and just phoned it in on version he released three years after Johnny released The One True Version, leading us to explain to the police at 2:15 am why the EMTs were having to haul that unconscious trash off to the hospital, and their not excepting the YouTube video of Johnny that we played for them on our phone.

This, friends and neighbors, is trash-talking poetry.

13 hours ago, Pimphand said:

Well I never went blind but my vision is getting blurry.

I'll take your word for it if you whore out your own equipment...

21 hours ago, atomheartbevo said:

I bet a lot of us are experts on the Ellis County Jail, because many of of us have probably had the experience of some cold, late December night at 2am,  when some toothless, inbred, goat fucker climbed onto a table and proudly told the patrons of the Waxahachie Waffle House #1347 that Dean Martin sang a better cover of “A Marshmallow World” than Johnny Fucking Mathis, and rest-in-peace Dino, but by the Gods we were not going to let that sister-fucker (probably named Cleetus) besmirch the good name of Texas-born Johnny Mathis by claiming that fucking Italian did it better when he didn’t have the range and just phoned it in on the version he released three years after Johnny released The One True Version, leading us to explain to the police at 2:15 am why the EMTs were having to haul that unconscious trash off to the hospital, and they were not accepting the YouTube video of Johnny that we played for them on our phone.

 

Same

I'm expert level at working with one hand.  I'm usually holding a drink in the other.  Next best thing, I'm guessing I'm the most accomplished sky diver here.  However, I'm willing to concede this one if you have 2 or more jumps.  

I have 2 from a class I took at UT

i bet I was the youngest person on here to pass my FAA flight test.  I did it on my 16th birthday

Edited by NeverMarryAStripper

On 1/9/2025 at 7:48 AM, closetohumping said:

 

masterbaiting

avatar checks out

24 minutes ago, PenelopeWitherspoon said:

How has no one nominated @NowThis for expertise in pegging?

 

It damned sure wouldn't be for discretion.😁

EA FC or FIFA beforehand. Although I think @Foosters just nudged me for the shaggy league title like a decade ago. 
So yea you could say I’m a big deal.

All things concrete construction.

Inshore salwater kayak fishing and camping.

Road cycling.

Rock climbing (retired).

Trumpet playing. (retired)

Classical guitar (also retired)

2nd gen Toyota Tacoma modification.

I seems that I have wasted my life.

Fixing old-school arcade games. Basically- if it was built in the 70s-90s and you could drop a quarter in it for some fun, I can probably fix it.

And maybe shooting pool. Or I was. I've played in the national championships in Vegas a few times. Don't get to shoot much these days.

6 hours ago, South Austin said:

I can tape all your buns together.

I can make spaghetti.

On 1/9/2025 at 6:51 AM, Bevo said:

I think today, I’ll be an expert in fire fighting and insurance.

George Costanza Fire GIF

Until the LA fires, I never knew we had so many firefighters on Surly....

Unsplitting infinitives in real time during conversation.

Edited by dcbc

On 1/15/2025 at 5:13 AM, South Austin said:

I can tape all your buns together.

Larry Lester's

On 1/15/2025 at 5:13 AM, South Austin said:

I can tape all your buns together.

 

IMG_1688.webp

On 1/8/2025 at 1:26 PM, texasdago said:

How to pronounce "Bruschetta"

With a “k” sound, right?

I guess one of mine would be how to pronounce “gif.”

13 hours ago, NoRagrets said:

Unaccomplished goal setting. 

Yeah. But at least you don’t ragret it.

 

2 hours ago, MonkeyDoughnut said:

I've been told I'm an expert at eating while driving.


I’m really enjoying the username and expertise combinations in this thread.

Keep it up, everyone.

 

43 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

Guessing the color of women's nips.

 

i-think-thats-pretty-good-cordell-walker

 

/your avatar and all

I’m probably the foremost expert on Polish Psychobilly, Ska, and punk rock music from the 80’s to now on this board. Also the shoe and clothing culture associated with it. 

6 hours ago, MissingInAction said:

Guessing the color of women's nips.

I'm pretty terrible at this. I've seen a lot of titties but many times you think you are going to get strawberry but you get chocolate or chocolate and you get strawberry. Personally, I  don't care either way as long as I get some pencil eraser tips.

5 hours ago, Covri said:

I’m probably the foremost expert on Polish Psychobilly, Ska, and punk rock music from the 80’s to now on this board. Also the shoe and clothing culture associated with it. 

Yeah I was gonna say this too, but I've kinda been letting it slide lately.

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