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Is anyone else not particularly surprised that a dude that gave himself the name prepuce of doom has kid with odd obsessions?

No judgment here at all, just an observation.

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On 1/16/2023 at 8:39 AM, Hmbre97 said:

Took my boys (6 and 11) to lunch yesterday. My 6 yr old is really into pretend play right now and is constantly saying "pretend I'm a ________" about everything we do. On the other side, my 11 yr old is slowly losing his innocence after just half a year in middle school.

We're getting ready to leave and my youngest takes one more drag off his root beer, then says "this root beer really tastes like a root beer dum-dum." As we get up and start to walk through this crowded restaurant to leave, he goes "pretend I'm a root beer dum-dum and suck on me". My oldest immediately goes "Ayyyyee yoooo" and starts giggling. As we're walking, he just keep saying "suck me, suck me, suck me, suck on my head" which sends my oldest over the edge. 

What's his surly name?

My DIL was playing a Q&A game with my almost 3-year old granddaughter last night (we are visiting). The questions were all “what’s your favorite” this or that. About 20 questions into it, she asked what her favorite body part is, and my granddaughter yelled out, “Nipples!”

She always liked singing the “head and shoulders, knees and toes” song, so this was unexpected. 

Edited by ImissWallyPryor

On 1/24/2023 at 7:47 AM, tbone_ said:

Is anyone else not particularly surprised that a dude that gave himself the name prepuce of doom has kid with odd obsessions?

No judgment here at all, just an observation.

Not surprised in the least.

Old dude on a gun forum posted this one about his kid…..

Quote

I once went on a school bus field trip with my son, I think it may of been 2nd grade. He got the entire bus singing a song called Diarrhea.....his teacher sitting up front, glared at me.

 

29 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

Old dude on a gun forum posted this one about his kid…..

 

. . . some people think its funny but its really green and runny . . . 

28 minutes ago, Jerry Callo said:

. . . some people think its funny but its really green and runny . . . 

When you're sliding into first and your pants begin to burst . . .

When you're sliding into third and you feel a great big turd

When you're sliding into home and your pants are full of foam

  • 2 weeks later...

Wish I Knew You by the Revivalists came on the radio, and he sang along "I wish I knew you when I was poop" throughout. 

  • 2 weeks later...

On the way to dinner with the fam we stopped at Home Depot to but a new shower head. My 7 year old daughter sees a gold shower head and says “a golden shower!? That must cost $1000!”

Hope you remind her what she said when she reaches adulthood. Lol

[Watching commercial for Chucky tv series with six year old daughter]

Daughter: Is Chucky a bad guy?

Me: Yes.

Daughter: Someone should stick a knife in him.

Me: ...

Random musings from the backseat this morning.
“Dirt is the Earth’s doodoo.”
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I hadn't contributed in a while, but here's an entry from my first-grade boy:

Son: “Can we go to Chicago this year?”
Me: “I don’t think so, buddy.”
Son: “I want to go to Chicago and flick ’The Bean.’”
Wife: “Excuse me??”
Son: “Millions of people go to Chicago every year to flick ‘The Bean.’”
Wife: “Where did you hear that?!”
Son: “YouTube.”
Wife: “Bennett! Stop saying—“
Son: “FLICK ‘THE BEAN!!’”
1 minute ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Out of town for work right now, and had this text conversation with Mrs. Doom yesterday:

 

Screenshot_20230217_072928_Message+.jpg

 

And a child shall lead them.

5 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Out of town for work right now, and had this text conversation with Mrs. Doom yesterday:

 

Screenshot_20230217_072928_Message+.jpg

Does he know how to cup and throw them yet? If not, that sounds like a father son activity for this weekend.

10 hours ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Does he know how to cup and throw them yet? If not, that sounds like a father son activity for this weekend.

We'll figure that out in due time. 

~~~~~

The Creature from Planet Simile earned him some mild consternation from his teacher today. 

121510.thumb.jpeg.52ec81498b28334ad74e598796baf96c.jpeg

Details of note:

A body as fat as my dad's booty

Skin as smelly and brown as my farts

Feet as long as Bol Bol

23 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Out of town for work right now, and had this text conversation with Mrs. Doom yesterday:

 

Screenshot_20230217_072928_Message+.jpg

You may have a Heisman winner in training. 
usatsi_19547179.jpg

Doomlet has been poring over NBA books and almanacs lately. 

Post Malone is currently delaying the start of the NBA All Star Game.

When he came on the TV, Doomlet quizzically asked, "That's Moses Malone?!"

55 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Doomlet has been poring over NBA books and almanacs lately. 

Post Malone is currently delaying the start of the NBA All Star Game.

When he came on the TV, Doomlet quizzically asked, "That's Moses Malone?!"

Tell him that it's Karl Malone.

Caught my 10.5 year old and her little friends going full Thujone writing dick and balls on each other’s pictures and sending them back and forth. I was fucking apoplectic!!! I tried to remember WTF I was up to at that age, shit’s just different today, rationalization, rationalization….I got nuthin. This is a kid that is just now “liking” some little bastard in her class, but is too shy to actually talk to him! Not to sound like too much like an old asshole, but it’s fucking scary the things kids are exposed to and are now normalized on a daily basis these days.

5 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Doomlet has been poring over NBA books and almanacs lately. 

Post Malone is currently delaying the start of the NBA All Star Game.

When he came on the TV, Doomlet quizzically asked, "That's Moses Malone?!"

 

4 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

Tell him that it's Karl Malone.

Tell him it's Mark Malone.

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“You know, in an earthquake, coffins become maracas”

57 minutes ago, GottaB said:

“You know, in an earthquake, coffins become maracas”

That's awesome!  High five your kid for me, please.

  • 2 weeks later...
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Chad Jr.: What has 178 teeth and holds back a monster?

Chad:….

Jr.: My zipper!

First big schlong joke. I’m shedding a salty tear.

In keeping with the theme, Doomlet informed us at dinner last night that if you ever lose a testicle, another one will take its spot to replace to it - just like shark's teeth. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

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Just so you guys know what is coming later (as in soon) when they stop picking boogers and playing with their dick, they are going to start giving you the blues...

 

We're on vacation... Yesterday we were standing in a line for something somewhere... as is usual, Little Brother (who is now 14 years old and jacked af) and I are hand fighting and wrestling about - to Mom's dismay.

Little Brother says, "Flex your pecs! Flex!" 

I flex my pecs. He flips my left pec.

"Old Man, you got them Lineman Tiddies."

I don't have any firsthand knowledge, but I am skeptical that your 14 year old has ceased playing with his dick! 

4 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I don't have any firsthand knowledge, but I am skeptical that your 14 year old has ceased playing with his dick! 

Like father, like son. 

Very topical but I'm helping my youngest (who just turned 7) with his shower. He tells me he needs to get out to poop. He's sitting there straining (because he never drinks enough and shits out a brown coke can about every 3 or so days). While he's straining, he notices is penis is at max length so goes "wooooooaaahhhh! look dada, look how big it is!", then starts singing a song about "sometimes it's big, sometimes it's small". He gets done and hops in the shower and proceeds to spend the next 3-5 minutes thumping it and grabbing it to stretch it out while still singing his song. 

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Just discovered him using Mrs. Doom's phone for this purpose. 

20230316_192743.thumb.jpg.85e830e449e1c297dc4b25aa5581cd9e.jpg

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

Search will it flush on YouTube. There's a guy with a whole channel

 

 

 

Edited by Grade of D as in David
You might also want to invest in a snake

17 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Search will it flush on YouTube. There's a guy with a whole channel

 

 

 

After this discovery, we had a stern talk with him about how only poop, pee, barf, and toilet paper go down the toilet. 

Technically correct is the best kind of correct.

20230316_174102.thumb.jpg.d841f10a50f57ba9f0c09b240b3fce6d.jpg

14 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I don't have any firsthand knowledge, but I am skeptical that your 14 year old has ceased playing with his dick! 

 

10 hours ago, thunderlounge said:

Like father, like son. 

826496449.gif.526872a2d8351a0ab8cdcd6c1e95b169.gif

10 hours ago, Hmbre97 said:

Very topical but I'm helping my youngest (who just turned 7) with his shower. He tells me he needs to get out to poop. He's sitting there straining (because he never drinks enough and shits out a brown coke can about every 3 or so days). While he's straining, he notices is penis is at max length so goes "wooooooaaahhhh! look dada, look how big it is!", then starts singing a song about "sometimes it's big, sometimes it's small". He gets done and hops in the shower and proceeds to spend the next 3-5 minutes thumping it and grabbing it to stretch it out while still singing his song. 

33d.gif.de9b3eedb0a5c12f7e0b3a422975a6da.gif

3 hours ago, Rimbo said:

Technically correct is the best kind of correct.

20230316_174102.thumb.jpg.d841f10a50f57ba9f0c09b240b3fce6d.jpg

Technically incorrect. It does show 1/3, so the answer is not "No".

Correct answer would be, "Yes, it shows 1/3, as well as 2/3 and 1."

 

I'm not usually a "well actually" kind of guy...

10 hours ago, Slacks said:

Technically incorrect. It does show 1/3, so the answer is not "No".

Correct answer would be, "Yes, it shows 1/3, as well as 2/3 and 1."

 

I'm not usually a "well actually" kind of guy...

I mean. The correct answer is "No, that marks 1/4, not 1/3,” but you do you. 🤣

kid: how was your day?

me: well it sucked. I fell while skiing, had to go to the hospital, have torn ligaments, can't ski anymore this trip and have to wear a sling for a month. How do you think my day was?

kid: well other than that one thing how was it?

9 hours ago, Rimbo said:

I mean. The correct answer is "No, that marks 1/4, not 1/3,” but you do you. 🤣

black-smart.gif.00d5685f35f89ab3c1cb9936827ed8de.gif

9 hours ago, Rimbo said:

I mean. The correct answer is "No, that marks 1/4, not 1/3,” but you do you. 🤣

I mean, actually the correct answer is "yes, assuming the scale is logarithmic."

15 hours ago, SilasCoade said:

I mean, actually the correct answer is "yes, assuming the scale is logarithmic."

nerds-mad.gif.2370ee4f446bac1f21e69af646bf7d4b.gif

He brought home his notebook from the poetry unit. This was his effort at free verse from a few weeks ago. 

 

126638.jpeg

 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom
*be sure to look closely at the upper left.

On 2/19/2023 at 6:24 PM, Scheiss Meister said:

Tell him that it's Karl Malone.

 

C50A4963-7281-4FA9-AAF9-2BEAB7EC0282.jpeg

10 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

what user name does your kid post under on the basketball board?

 

 

It'll be another few years yet before the board and the boy are ready for each other...

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