Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

Just now:

Quote

This is why you do what I did and BEFRIEND an attorney, an accountant, a realtor, and a private investigator. That way you can get into or out of almost any situation

 

Edited by Walden Ponderer

  • 3 weeks later...
  • Author

Just now, drunk chick to some guy:

”I sucked your dick! Why won’t you share your Netflix account with me?!”

Just now, drunk chick to some guy:

”I sucked your dick! Why won’t you share your Netflix account with me?!”

Flip side... my ex once told me “you eat my pussy, idgaf if you double dip.” We were at trudys

3 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

Just now, drunk chick to some guy:

”I sucked your dick! Why won’t you share your Netflix account with me?!”

That seems reasonable. 

Really, it seems to be a pretty fair trade.

Just now, drunk chick to some guy:
”I sucked your dick! Why won’t you share your Netflix account with me?!”


Did you offer up your Netflix account?
12 hours ago, Zepol87 said:

Flip side... my ex once told me “you eat my pussy, idgaf if you double dip.” We were at trudys

I don’t think the double dipping she was referring to had anything to do with chips and salsa

  • 2 weeks later...

"any man who has ever driven a car for any distance has used a piss jug"...stocky older black male at nomad bar, 2012?

Edited by Wyatt Mann

  • 1 month later...

Finally got one to contribute from lunch at a restaurant (non strip club nor even breastaurant for that matter)...

“I didn’t know what to give up for lent one year so I decided i wouldn’t flash my tits. It was high school, before I got implants, there’s no way I’d give that up now”

 

On 12/9/2019 at 10:45 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

[workswithseed] I'm functionally illiterate. [workswithseed]

Joke's on you. I can't read.

On 1/21/2020 at 12:00 AM, bluto said:

Finally got one to contribute from lunch at a restaurant (non strip club nor even breastaurant for that matter)...

“I didn’t know what to give up for lent one year so I decided i wouldn’t flash my tits. It was high school, before I got implants, there’s no way I’d give that up now”

 

I'm gonna assume your next comment  was "prove it." If not, I am disappoint. 

Baboso, his side piece and I were at a daytime drinking spot of ours. Bartender is telling us about some of pissed off owner of a nail salon/waxing place. She said, "I wouldn't let that bitch give me a wax job. She might rip my clit off. Don't be messing with my little bean down there.".

Baboso, his side piece and I were at a daytime drinking spot of ours. Bartender is telling us about some of pissed off owner of a nail salon/waxing place. She said, "I wouldn't let that bitch give me a wax job. She might rip my clit off. Don't be messing with my little bean down there.".

Baboso, his side piece and I were at a daytime drinking spot of ours. Bartender is telling us about some of pissed off owner of a nail salon/waxing place. She said, "I wouldn't let that bitch give me a wax job. She might rip my clit off. Don't be messing with my little bean down there.".

Baboso, his side piece and I were at a daytime drinking spot of ours. Bartender is telling us about some of pissed off owner of a nail salon/waxing place. She said, "I wouldn't let that bitch give me a wax job. She might rip my clit off. Don't be messing with my little bean down there.".

Baboso, his side piece and I were at a daytime drinking spot of ours. Bartender is telling us about some pissed off owner of a nail salon/waxing place. She said, "I wouldn't let that bitch give me a wax job. She might rip my clit off. Don't be messing with my little bean down there.".

  • Popular Post

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Baboso, his side piece and I....

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Baboso, his side piece and I....

When the site is sucking like this, do not hit submit more than once. Your initial post will eventually go through. 

16 minutes ago, ss13 said:

When the site is sucking like this, do not hit submit more than once. Your initial post will eventually go through. 

It's pretty sad.

  • 3 weeks later...
  • Author
On 1/22/2020 at 2:45 PM, hullabelew said:

Baboso, his side piece and I were at a daytime drinking spot of ours. Bartender is telling us about some of pissed off owner of a nail salon/waxing place. She said, "I wouldn't let that bitch give me a wax job. She might rip my clit off. Don't be messing with my little bean down there.".

Cool story bro! Tell it again! Oh wait...

  • 3 weeks later...

I was at a dive bar a few nights ago and a gay guy told me his cock died and asked if he could bury it in my ass.

If I was a girl I would have put out.

1 hour ago, jetplane said:

I was at a dive bar a few nights ago and a gay guy told me his cock died and asked if he could bury it in my ass.

If I was a girl I would have put out.

NowThis?

On 2/28/2020 at 9:29 AM, jetplane said:

I was at a dive bar a few nights ago and a gay guy told me his cock died and asked if he could bury it in my ass.

If I was a girl I would have put out.

If you were a girl he wouldn't have told you.

On 2/28/2020 at 9:29 AM, jetplane said:

I was at a dive bar a few nights ago and a gay guy told me his cock died and asked if he could bury it in my ass.

If I was a girl I would have put out.

NowThis doesn't make sense. 

  • Author

Will drinking corona make me immune to coronavirus? 

Some dumb bitch at Kelly’s in Allen just now 

On 1/22/2020 at 3:25 PM, EE2B said:

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Baboso, his side piece and I....

...but how many clits does that bitch have?

Corona virus days and I'm just coming to the realization that I'm going to be watching a few more fishing tournaments. 

  • 2 weeks later...

One last shout out before this thread falls off the first page.  I haz a sad.  

We played a pretty fun game yesterday at my buddy’s house with Alexa/Amazon Music.  
 

First person picks a song, next person has to pick a song from an artist/band that has the same first or last name (genre doesn’t matter).   We went from:

Bobby Brown -my prerogative 

to 

Bobby Womack- Across 110th St

to 

Leanne Womack

to 

Leigh Ann Rimes

to 

Busta Rhymes

 

was pretty fun, drinks flowed 

 

12 hours ago, Trey3216 said:

We played a pretty fun game yesterday at my buddy’s house with Alexa/Amazon Music.  
 

First person picks a song, next person has to pick a song from an artist/band that has the same first or last name (genre doesn’t matter).   We went from:

Bobby Brown -my prerogative 

to 

Bobby Womack- Across 110th St

to 

Leanne Womack

to 

Leigh Ann Rimes

to 

Busta Rhymes

 

was pretty fun, drinks flowed 

 

Should've started with the Beatles. 

  • 4 months later...
  • Author

“Because of covid I’m fat but I’m still cute!”

Just now at Ozona Grill in Dallas 

“Because of covid I’m fat but I’m still cute!”
Just now at Ozona Grill in Dallas 

Pics?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
11 hours ago, Whatever said:


Pics?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Vic sock?

I’d be happy just to be in a bar overhearing anything right now. 

15 hours ago, Longboard Horn said:

“Because of covid I’m fat but I’m still cute!”

Just now at Ozona Grill in Dallas 

Guess she’s gained the “COVID-19”

  • 5 months later...
  • Author

While at Reno's last night,

this hot metal head chick: dude why is your hair so much prettier than mine?!

Me: fuck around and find out

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...
Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business & Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Advertise... Tailgate Donations

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.