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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread

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19 minutes ago, Billy Pilgrim said:

I’ve been annoyed with the Northwestern Mutual commercials shown during bowl season- specifically, the ones with the bratty kids. The one that pisses me off most is the teen-age daughter busting her dad’s balls for not taking her to a friend’s house while he’s mowing the yard so he decides to buy her a pool. Then there’s the family who takes their daughter to Hawaii but the little bitch is bored the whole time.

as R kelly sings.... shes only 7 once.............................

 

 

 

Edit:  too soon?

Edited by AUS-97HORN

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  • Dennis Taylor
    Dennis Taylor

    So, like an OnlyFansville? 

  • man FUCK all of these bullshit-ass holiday commercials trying to tug at your fuckin heart strings like that has fucking dick to do with buying a car or a computer or whatever. this latest one i saw wa

  • Jameslaw121
    Jameslaw121

    The other day at work, we had about 10-12 people in out lobby - probably 20' by 30' room, but the cleaning crew was trying to finish vacuuming. I was trying to get people out of their way when one of

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I kept thinking how that little red head girl is going to look like a lobster after 12 minutes in the sun

Can we just talk generally about how fucking much louder the commercials are than the shows? Fuck them in general.

Progressive making fun of Chevy is pretty great.  

On 1/11/2019 at 10:52 AM, Billy Pilgrim said:

I’ve been annoyed with the Northwestern Mutual commercials shown during bowl season- specifically, the ones with the bratty kids. The one that pisses me off most is the teen-age daughter busting her dad’s balls for not taking her to a friend’s house while he’s mowing the yard so he decides to buy her a pool. Then there’s the family who takes their daughter to Hawaii but the little bitch is bored the whole time.

My buddy hates that commercial so much that he will come back into the room when he hears it just to yell at the TV.

He recently learned he'll be having a daughter in a few months.  I told him I'll be helping her with her first word: dad-uh

In the correct world the "Dad-uh" bitch has to mow the rest of the yard before she gets to go to her friends house. 

some insurance company- really any insurance company- needs to come out with an ad about how terrible all insurance ads are.

"here at surly mutual we know what's important to you and your family- commercials. why are all the ads for insurance companies so terrible? we at surly mutual are committed to bringing you only the best in television advertisement." 

then it fades out to reveal some artie lange looking dude sitting in his la•z•boy actually watching the commercial on his own TV. he freaks out, screams something about how all these insurance ads are driving him nuts, throws the remote at the TV and the TV explodes and starts a house fire. "looks like we're gonna need to call surly mutual."

boom. done. better than every insurance ad out there today. 

19 hours ago, BadgerHorn said:

My buddy hates that commercial so much that he will come back into the room when he hears it just to yell at the TV.

He recently learned he'll be having a daughter in a few months.  I told him I'll be helping her with her first word: dad-uh

 

12 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

In the correct world the "Dad-uh" bitch has to mow the rest of the yard before she gets to go to her friends house. 

Why can’t Little Miss ride her bike to her friend’s house?

Why can’t Little Miss ride her bike to her friend’s house?
UGGGGHHHHH!

Honest question... Will the people who drink Miller Lite actually care about an ingredients list?

Any of y'all seen that horrible ad for the Real Real? Something about this ugly, androgenous "model" makes me ragey.

 

Edited by Knoxtnhorn

Honest question... Will the people who drink Miller Lite actually care about an ingredients list?

It’s piss
On 1/6/2019 at 7:04 PM, Goo Punch said:

oh and for those fortunate ones who've never seen the OK babysitter commercial, it's a multiracial gay couple with an ethnic, hipster babysitter. it's too much.

 

The extended version on PornHub is pretty good, though.

1 hour ago, demos said:


It’s piss

Hmm... you're right.

PissLabel.jpg

I'm not sure if it's been mentioned in this thread but just in case not I want to let any potential contractors know that I'm ready. I am awaiting your call to fly to Hollywood and murder the person who keeps green lighting the Discover Cash Back Cash match people commercial with the Asian girls. I do not blame the girls. Or Asia. But I want to kill every single person involved with this ad. I mean I've already admitted to my crimes here. I'm willing to go to jail for the rest of my life and have my children raised by The Simpsons and Bunk'd. It's fine. As long as we can get rid of those commercials. 

it's very "2019" that "shitting on dedicated fathers" is a theme in today's national ads. the same driving force behind making sure every commercial has as many races, genders, and clutures as possible would be the same ones to decide that shitting on your dad who just spent his evening saving your date night or who's currently mowing your lawn would be acceptable and well received. 

also, all of this "diversity" usually isn't even authentic diversity. it's usually just a white washed version of a non-white person. I just saw some rx ad tonight for chron's featuring a band consisting of: white girl lead singer and white girl guitarist, black drummer, long-haired japanese looking bassist, and then probably an indian or hispanic looming member as well, i can't remember. except that they were all dressed like hipster doofuses. that's not diversity, that's a bunch of hipsters. your little bohemian fantasy friends only exist in TV commercials, thus making it faux diversity at the end of the day.

also, all of this "diversity" usually isn't even authentic diversity. it's usually just a white washed version of a non-white person. I just saw some rx ad tonight for chron's featuring a band consisting of: white girl lead singer and white girl guitarist, black drummer, long-haired japanese looking bassist, and then probably an indian or hispanic looming member as well, i can't remember. except that they were all dressed like hipster doofuses. that's not diversity, that's a bunch of hipsters. your little bohemian fantasy friends only exist in TV commercials, thus making it faux diversity at the end of the day.

Hey man, annoying hipsters who you wanna kill can be ANY race now - that’s progress!
20 hours ago, Goo Punch said:

some insurance company- really any insurance company- needs to come out with an ad about how terrible all insurance ads are.

"here at surly mutual we know what's important to you and your family- commercials. why are all the ads for insurance companies so terrible? we at surly mutual are committed to bringing you only the best in television advertisement." 

then it fades out to reveal some artie lange looking dude sitting in his la•z•boy actually watching the commercial on his own TV. he freaks out, screams something about how all these insurance ads are driving him nuts, throws the remote at the TV and the TV explodes and starts a house fire. "looks like we're gonna need to call surly mutual."

boom. done. better than every insurance ad out there today. 

They did, it's with Dennis Quaid

  • Author
11 hours ago, Goo Punch said:

also, all of this "diversity" usually isn't even authentic diversity. it's usually just a white washed version of a non-white person. I just saw some rx ad tonight for chron's featuring a band consisting of: white girl lead singer and white girl guitarist, black drummer, long-haired japanese looking bassist, and then probably an indian or hispanic looming member as well, i can't remember. except that they were all dressed like hipster doofuses. that's not diversity, that's a bunch of hipsters. your little bohemian fantasy friends only exist in TV commercials, thus making it faux diversity at the end of the day.

Want to hate this commercial even more? Pay attention to her "singing" and then the way they interact with each other like a bunch of deaf mutes who haven't discovered sign language. 

On 1/13/2019 at 11:38 AM, PittsburghTiger said:

 

Why can’t Little Miss ride her bike to her friend’s house?

Dad watched S3 of True Detective.

23 hours ago, RamjetFDO said:

Honest question... Will the people who drink Miller Lite actually care about an ingredients list?

actually is bud light

22 hours ago, demos said:


It’s piss

that too

2 hours ago, elfenix said:

actually is bud light

But I don’t like Bud Light. 

Airtime is really cheap in Reno

So now a razor company is implying most men are scum. What a time to be alive.

8 hours ago, Okie State said:

So now a razor company is implying most men are scum. What a time to be alive.

Haven’t see the commercial so I’ll reserve judgement but if a fucking corporation is going to come off as telling me how I can go about being a better man they can fuck the hell off.  “Lady Bic” will shave my legs just as well as a Gilette thank you very much. 

Edit didn’t see the link above.  Fuck Gilette 

 

Edited by Lhorn

18 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

This commercial is outstanding. 

 

"Prison is full of people who have never roller-skated!"

Actual commercial just now on MLBNet:

"Have you ever been prescribed X...you or your loved ones may have been exposed to...genital eating infections...."

Usually 1 servings per container....

 

On 1/13/2019 at 7:32 PM, RamjetFDO said:

Hmm... you're right.

PissLabel.jpg

 

Speaking of MLBN, Kelly Nash was on the other night...  Good...  Fucking...  Lord. 

On 1/14/2019 at 9:07 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

This commercial is outstanding. 

 

No to reefer?..... Unsubscribed

So some hotshot ad executive probably got rich writing this piece of shit jingle. Amazing.

 

On 1/15/2019 at 12:10 AM, Caddox said:

 

I NEVER visit CR and my Twitter feed is 100% sports, weather, and breaking news.  That being said, I did take the time to go to Gillette's Twitter to tell them to F off.

14 hours ago, Underdog said:

Speaking of MLBN, Kelly Nash was on the other night...  Good...  Fucking...  Lord. 

try reloading those pics

6 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

I NEVER visit CR and my Twitter feed is 100% sports, weather, and breaking news.  That being said, I did take the time to go to Gillette's Twitter to tell them to F off.

Thank you for your service

Every single one of these Whole Foods commercials are fucking terrible.

On 1/16/2019 at 8:41 AM, 'stache said:

So some hotshot ad executive probably got rich writing this piece of shit jingle. Amazing.

 

not as good as his "hot pockets" or "by mennen" work

1 hour ago, elfenix said:

not as good as his "hot pockets" or "by mennen" work

Those are short and catchy. This one is the word Liberty four times and is obnoxiously bad. It's the two melodies, each sung twice. So bad.

On 1/16/2019 at 8:52 AM, Knoxtnhorn said:

I NEVER visit CR and my Twitter feed is 100% sports, weather, and breaking news.  That being said, I did take the time to go to Gillette's Twitter to tell them to F off.

Sounds like you are in serious need of detoxifying your masculinity.

 

 

(Please know that is sarcasm on my part).

Edited by Uncle Nate

Those are short and catchy. This one is the word Liberty four times and is obnoxiously bad. It's the two melodies, each sung twice. So bad.


His jail release ad tops his portfolio

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