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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread

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29 minutes ago, Beau Vine said:

 

Fuck Kawhi...rot in hell.

 

Oh, and why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why do we drive on a parkway but park on a driveway?

Why does sour cream have an expiration date?

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  • Dennis Taylor
    Dennis Taylor

    So, like an OnlyFansville? 

  • man FUCK all of these bullshit-ass holiday commercials trying to tug at your fuckin heart strings like that has fucking dick to do with buying a car or a computer or whatever. this latest one i saw wa

  • Jameslaw121
    Jameslaw121

    The other day at work, we had about 10-12 people in out lobby - probably 20' by 30' room, but the cleaning crew was trying to finish vacuuming. I was trying to get people out of their way when one of

Posted Images

Kawhi seems like he’s be a great actor.  All the range and emotion of a cinder block. 
 

He says his line like he’s nervous that he’ll wreck the fake car he’s driving in front of a green screen. 

Edited by Lhorn

22 hours ago, Hate said:

Fuck Kawhi...rot in hell.

 

Oh, and why did kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Why do we drive on a parkway but park on a driveway?

Why does sour cream have an expiration date?

If 7/11 is open 24hrs, why are there locks on the doors???

24 minutes ago, NTVTXN said:

If 7/11 is open 24hrs, why are there locks on the doors???

For the crime scene cleanup.

Kawhi seems like he’s be a great actor.  All the range and emotion of a cinder block. 
 
He says his line like he’s nervous that he’ll wreck the fake car he’s driving in front of a green screen. 

I wish he would.

None of this makes any sense.   I don't get the punch in the alleged punch line.

 

Edited by clapclapclap

This fucker needs a shower, shave, haircut...and a swift kick in the balls:

 

On 5/26/2021 at 8:36 PM, 83Horn said:

This fucker needs a shower, shave, haircut...and a swift kick in the balls:

 

Dude is the spitting image of my freshman roommate. He used to take ecstasy by himself on weeknights and dance with glowsticks in the bathroom mirror. 

On 5/23/2021 at 5:05 AM, Longhornstampede said:

You must not have visited Pleasant Grove or Oak Cliff lately

Or Monaco . . . 

Anti-theft mechanism for Rolls Royce hood ornament

 

Speak of JFSF, have we talked about the CP3 Jr Jr thing? Not scrolling back. I mean he's a kid so I'm not ripping him but maybe whoever was directing or filming the commercial could have gotten some kind of more intelligible soundbite of Jr Jr saying "I wasn't even recording!" instead "I don't...I wasn't even....record...global warming" or whatever the fuck he mumbles. 

I don't get the whole famous DJ thing.  Does it really take a lot of skill and talent to spin records.

It’s a little more than announcing “Bianca, coming to the main stage” then playing ZZ Top
3 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I don't get the whole famous DJ thing.  Does it really take a lot of skill and talent to spin records.

This, and I thought I heard that the music is all mixed on a computer beforehand and you essentially hit play on the laptop.  The turntables and such are just a prop.

I mean you still have to hold a head phone to just one ear, bop your head and ask tell the audience you want them to make some noise and when they make some noise, you have to tell them that you can’t hear them (even though you can hear them - well).  I guess there’s some skill in that.  
 

Any surly scratchers skilled on the 1s and 2s confirm this?

Edited by Lhorn

1 hour ago, Lhorn said:

Any surly scratchers skilled on the 1s and 2s confirm this?

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Nothing gets a young, hip crowd moving more than a 40 year old ex-cop spinning records. 

  • Author
7 hours ago, washparkhorn said:

DJ Citizen Jane is making me ragey in NBA playoff games. 

Women Who Spin - ellgeeBE

All current or former Miami cops can and should go fuck themselves in the goatass. 

DJ Killing Citizens Jane is more like it. 

20 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

All current or former Miami cops can and should go fuck themselves in the goatass. 

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On 5/27/2021 at 10:26 PM, NorthLoop said:

Dude is the spitting image of my freshman roommate. He used to take ecstasy by himself on weeknights and dance with glowsticks in the bathroom mirror. 

and here I thought my freshman roommate who could make a bong out of an apple was something 

Lol. Imma go out on a limb and say I love that commercial.  Don’t hate on Lil Sweet shredding or Night Ranger. 

I take no position on The Doctor, but leave Lil' Sweet alone!

LeaveBritneyAlone.jpg

He's the sweet one!!!

Plus

Spoiler

Justin Guarini needs a gig. That bitch Kelly Clarkson got all the good deals. 

 

Edited by RPM

1 hour ago, RPM said:

 

  Hide contents

Justin Guarini needs a gig. That bitch Kelly Clarkson ate all the good deals. 

 

fify

Every other goddamn TV commercial is for some fucking drug.

On 4/27/2021 at 10:29 PM, Dennis Taylor said:

Apparently Domino's is bringing back the Noid. 

We saw the Noid commercial tonight. I'm 41, my wife is 38. I said, "Oh fuck, the Noid commercial." She said, "What are you talking about? What is the Noid?"

Are we the dividing line between those who remember the Noid and those who don't?

3 minutes ago, HornOnTheBayou said:

We saw the Noid commercial tonight. I'm 41, my wife is 38. I said, "Oh fuck, the Noid commercial." She said, "What are you talking about? What is the Noid?"

Are we the dividing line between those who remember the Noid and those who don't?

Maybe so. I'm 52 so you must have been pretty young when they ran that dumbass idea the first time 

22 hours ago, XYZ said:

Every other goddamn TV commercial is for some fucking drug.

Or an ambulance chasing sleazebag.

16 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

The Noid was "popular" (and I use that word loosely) from 1986 to 1989.

And the ending of the whole ad campaign has a pretty fucked up final chapter - see the "Decline" portion of the Wiki page:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Noid

Quote

Police Chief Reed Miller told reporters, "He's para-noid."[11] 

Lol what a dick

That Parkinson's medicine ad with the guy that likes to paint maybe could pick an actor with a slightly different look

 

nuplazid-seeing-things-small-3.jpg

2000.jpeg

On 5/28/2021 at 2:28 PM, Lhorn said:

Any surly scratchers skilled on the 1s and 2s confirm this?

Are they not called "the wheels of steel" anymore? When did this happen?

Applebee's using the Cheers theme in their commercials is about like aggy claiming fake championships and putting phony banners up to celebrate them. crApplebee's sucks ass in the first place, but that's pretty aggy. They should be called aggybee's. Fuck crApplebee's / aggybee's.

Edited by DougO

  • Author

This commercial cracks me the fuck up, at least for the time being before the novelty wears off. 

 

20210604_164408.jpg

Annoyingass, seemingly unblockable, VRBO ads that infect youtube. Such a damn pain.

if i ever hear an actual person say, "how about a Beam & Ginger high ball?" in real life, then i am going to assault that person.

also, that ad makes zero sense. guy number 1 has a get together at his house, and he fills a cooler with beers. guy number two shows up, so guy number one offers him a beer from the cooler of beers that guy number one bought for his get together. guy number two immediately gets so flummoxed that he becomes alice in wonderland, so then guy number one, the host of the get together who bought the beers and put them in a cooler out in his backyard, worriedly grabs guy number two and says, "how about a Beam & ginger high ball instead?", after which they both nod in affirmation and then take a deep breath and wipe their brow, as if they just avoided making some life altering mistake. 

how the fuck did that idea become an actual commercial?

The new Verizon commercials with Kate McKinnon. I don't understand. You paid a room full of people to pretend to talk to one another and nervously glance at Kate McKinnon while she struts around like an ostrich?

Car commercials are getting worse and worse. 
 

And the Toyota one where two other cars drive next to their friend wishing her luck for a job interview and have a banner. 

 

 

8 minutes ago, hundredTT said:

Car commercials are getting worse and worse. 
 

And the Toyota one where two other cars drive next to their friend wishing her luck for a job interview and have a banner. 

 

 

His poor Subaru-driving, lesbian sister. He made her late for her own wedding because of a cat. 

This commercial cracks me the fuck up, at least for the time being before the novelty wears off. 
 
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22 hours ago, hundredTT said:

And the Toyota one where two other cars drive next to their friend wishing her luck for a job interview and have a banner. 

well, we know this whatever generation (igen? Gen Z-1?) needs to be told how great they are every day, the commercial just shows all that gen that true friends will try to run you off the road and distract you right before a job interview... in a car that if you look at the logo wrong.... looks like a fucking Volkswagen emblem. 

23 hours ago, hundredTT said:

Car commercials are getting worse and worse. 
 

And the Toyota one where two other cars drive next to their friend wishing her luck for a job interview and have a banner. 

 

 

And she parks right up front like she owns the place. 

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