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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread

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They are not wings. They are hybrid chicken nuggets/tenders with sauce. Get that boneless shit tfo. 

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  • Dennis Taylor
    Dennis Taylor

    So, like an OnlyFansville? 

  • man FUCK all of these bullshit-ass holiday commercials trying to tug at your fuckin heart strings like that has fucking dick to do with buying a car or a computer or whatever. this latest one i saw wa

  • Jameslaw121
    Jameslaw121

    The other day at work, we had about 10-12 people in out lobby - probably 20' by 30' room, but the cleaning crew was trying to finish vacuuming. I was trying to get people out of their way when one of

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On 4/27/2022 at 10:28 PM, Baboontyme said:

Much like the kid, I like turtles. I really want them to persevere. I do. 

But come the fuck on Kia. Buy a Kia so you can comb the beach for trash and save the turtles by the moonlight. Amazing.  

And the voice-over says "movement that inspires" at the same time that a spastic little turtle is just flapping almost uselessly in place while obviously trying to reach the safety of the ocean. 

Not inspiring movement in my view. 

Why do we need to see fatasses in their adult diapers?  We've all known how underwear works since age 3, there is no need for gratuitous virtue signaling inclusive gross outs.

On 4/30/2022 at 1:57 AM, RPM said:

kroger.gif

I still do that dance and sing, "Lo lo lo lo, lo lo lo lo lo" every time I enter a Kroger.  In clashing Russian shirt, brown pants, and stolen ND leprechaun coat (no crocs, no bald).

And the Icky Shuffle at the cold cuts counter (no floor spike).  

Edited by clapclapclap

45 minutes ago, clapclapclap said:

And the Icky Shuffle at the cold cuts counter (no floor spike).  

That's like saying "Yippie ki yea" with out the motherfucker.

In case you were wondering what the little xfinity senorita (age 25 btw) looks like under those horrible clothes they have her wearing in those commercials...

 

becky-g-patbo-oscars-afterparty-dress-photos.jpg

WealthyDeafeningBoilweevil-max-1mb.gif

Edited by Dennis Taylor

On 5/5/2022 at 11:13 AM, RPM said:

That's like saying "Yippie ki yea" with out the motherfucker.

Yippee ki yea, Mr. Falcon.

I don't understand why it was necessary to have Steph Curry dress up like a mime. Is that some kind of inside joke that I'm missing or is it as baffling as it seems?

He'll miss the big game...but not because of tetanus.

On 5/5/2022 at 7:27 PM, Dennis Taylor said:

In case you were wondering what the little xfinity senorita (age 25 btw) looks like under those horrible clothes they have her wearing in those commercials...

 

becky-g-patbo-oscars-afterparty-dress-photos.jpg

WealthyDeafeningBoilweevil-max-1mb.gif

She was in that wildly annoying JitB commercial, so... wnb.

becky-g-jackinthebox-PAGE-2020.jpg

A supplement is like a god, you don't have to prove it works.

BETTER OFFER BETTY

CASH OFFER CARL

 

Honestly I kind of like this ad. I've just been beaten over the head with it and feel like it deserved a mention. 

Can’t tell if Gronk is really dumb or playing dumb but he’s doing it in Subway commercials now. How fun. Hahahahahaha

1 hour ago, mr. sunshine said:

Can’t tell if Gronk is really dumb or playing dumb

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The CB1 weight-gain commercial I have seen is awful, “I gained 56 pounds and now my ass is huge, and I am puuuummmmppppeeeeddd”.

The USPS commercial with Johnny Cash singing "I've been everywhere, man" over and fuckin over is wretched.

23 minutes ago, clapclapclap said:

The Gatorade Fit (*Fat) obese whale yoga ad.

I haven’t seen that one but took a guess before I looked up the ad … obese woman (probably black) in tight spandex work out clothes playing the part of an intense athlete….yup!  When will we as a society be inclusive enough to put the obese man on a pedestal?   

4 hours ago, Capt. Squints said:

The USPS commercial with Johnny Cash singing "I've been everywhere, man" over and fuckin over is wretched.

The lyrics should be changed for accuracy "I leave your packages anywhere, man..."

I haven’t seen that one but took a guess before I looked up the ad … obese woman (probably black) in tight spandex work out clothes playing the part of an intense athlete….yup!  When will we as a society be inclusive enough to put the obese man on a pedestal?   

Winner winner. They even try to make us believe that she is able to get one leg above waist level.

Well what do you know, Seji Alexander of Fisher Investments is a real person and not an actor’s portrayal... 

image.jpeg.45a034418efd02ea00fd5eca126582d7.jpeg

Looks better in the commercial but still wood. 

Well what do you know, Seji Alexander of Fisher Investments is a real person and not an actor’s portrayal... 
image.jpeg.45a034418efd02ea00fd5eca126582d7.jpeg
Looks better in the commercial but still wood. 

Assumed they were real as the old lady who talks like she’s had a stroke probably wouldn’t be hired as an actor.
  • 2 weeks later...

This chick in Wayfair ad has great legs… 

A4BB7E2D-DF54-472A-A607-299DC35DD4A2.jpeg.060095841f0bc555ded01c85efadb8ef.jpeg

like a feedbag. 

8 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

A twittermercial, but still pretty good.

 

Now you almost wonder if he was a plant. 

That long-running Harrelson's Own CBD bullshit, when that chick says "I'm like crushin' it all day..."

Oh yeah, sure you are. Just something really annoying about her.

Edited by DougO

No, Gatorade, that giant fat chick is neither ‘fit’ nor healthy. The only thing on her inside is pizza and cupcakes.

And I know we’ve already covered that one but they keep showing it and showing it and showing it and showing it.

“Is that a real song?”

still trying figure out the fuck they’re singing, my hearing sucks.  

No, Gatorade, that giant fat chick is neither ‘fit’ nor healthy. The only thing on her inside is pizza and cupcakes.

Her rehydration drink of choice: Sonic Route 44 double chocolate cream cheese shake.

can't stand this whataburger ad where this soy boy beta cuck sits there and helplessly watches his chick take his food and then eat it in front of him. 

So maybe I'm just a simple man, but the Rush Chevrolet radio ads with Bush and Clinton always get a chuckle out of me. 

Frosted Flakes ad that is all over ESPN app during college baseball games. A bunch of active healthy kids who play soccer, starting their day slurping down a bowl of processed corn syrup. Have some fruit or whole grain cereal if you're serious about sports.

33 minutes ago, 'stache said:

Frosted Flakes ad that is all over ESPN app during college baseball games. A bunch of active healthy kids who play soccer, starting their day slurping down a bowl of processed corn syrup. Have some fruit or whole grain cereal if you're serious about sports.

Thanks Marv Marinovich

On 6/3/2022 at 3:52 PM, Scary Stranger said:

No, Gatorade, that giant fat chick is neither ‘fit’ nor healthy. The only thing on her inside is pizza and cupcakes.

I got a laugh out of singing "one of these things is not like the other" when that one came on.

I am pretty sure @blacklab was one of the "answer" givers to that site like 15 years ago.  Or at least I thought i remember him bragging about getting paid well to answer stupid bar questions in that 2-3 year period where this service existed where we had phones, but not smart enough phones to just get the answer ourselves.

On 6/6/2022 at 10:50 AM, 'stache said:

 Have some fruit or whole grain cereal if you're serious about sports.

Ahem 

john-belushi-little-chocolate-donuts.gif

52 minutes ago, AUS-97HORN said:

I am pretty sure @blacklab was one of the "answer" givers to that site like 15 years ago.  Or at least I thought i remember him bragging about getting paid well to answer stupid bar questions in that 2-3 year period where this service existed where we had phones, but not smart enough phones to just get the answer ourselves.

Not me. 

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