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Featured Replies

  • Popular Post

Two things: one, don't tell nobody about this. This shit is between me, you, and Mr. soon-to-be-coaching-the-rest-of-his-short-ass-career-in-New Mexico coordinator here. It ain't noboby else's business. Two, you leave town tonight, right now, and when you gone, you stay gone or you be gone. You lost all your Austin privileges. Deal?
 

14 minutes ago, David Dennison said:

You need to get rid of your OC. 

Now.

 

GorgeousHonestDikdik-size_restricted.gif

 

“I don’t need to tell you this, but we’re both paid to win football games.”

“I shouldn’t need to tell you this, but we’re both paid to win football games.”



Slight modification.

“What the Fuck!?!”

Edited by Wishbone

What the fuck have you been doing the last eight months?

58 minutes ago, David Dennison said:

You need to get rid of your OC. 

Now.

 

But add "Or i'll get rid of you. We're done close the door on your way out"

Edited by LonghornGoodfella

You have 4 QBs and another one playing receiver, I don't give a shit if you break every one you run the fucking offense that got you this job.

Go get your fucking shine box.

Would rather think about a meeting between these two.

 

CDC_logo.jpgs-l300.jpg

Tommy... Remember I told you when I started; the guys who last in this business ..are the guys who fly straight, low-key, quiet, and win. And the guys who want it all; chicas, champagne, flash ..they don't last

If you can't win, why don't you try sticking your head up your ass,  see if it fits.  

 

  • Popular Post

CDC: You're talking about what. You're talking about... Bitching about that second half lead you lost,some sonofabitch who don't don’t like your grill, some broad you're trying to screw, so forth. Let's talk about something important. They all here?

Fenves: All but one.

CDC: I'm going anyway. Let's talk about something important. Put. That coffee. Down. Coffee's for coaches only. You think I'm fucking with you? I am not fucking with you. I'm here from downtown. I'm here from Red and Mack. And I'm here on a mission of mercy. Your name's Herman? You call yourself a coach, you son of a bitch?

Oscar Giles: I don't gotta sit here and listen to this shit.

CDC: You certainly don't, pal, 'cause the good news is - you're fired. The bad news is - you've got, all of you've got just one week to regain your jobs starting with tonight. Starting with tonight's game. Oh? Have I got your attention now? Good. 'Cause we're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anyone wanna see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. Get the picture? You laughing now? You got recruits. Red paid good money, get their names to sign them; you can't close the recruits you're given, you can't close shit. You ARE shit! Hit the bricks, pal, and beat it 'cause you are going OUT!

Beck: The players are weak.

CDC: The players are weak? Fucking players are weak. You're weak! I've been in this business 15 years...

Mensa: What's your name?

CDC: Fuck you! That's my name! You know why, mister? You drove a Hyundai to get here. I drove an eighty-thousand dollar BMW. THAT'S my name. And your name is you're wanting. You can't play in the man's game, you can't coach them - go home and tell your wife your troubles. Because only one thing counts in this life: Get them to sign on the line which is dotted. You hear me, you fucking faggots? A-B-C. A-Always, B-Be, C-Coaching. Always be coaching. ALWAYS BE COACHING. A-I-D-A. Attention, Interest, Decision, Action. Attention - Do I have your attention? Interest - Are you interested? I know you are, 'cause it's fuck or walk. You coach or you hit the bricks. Decision - Have you made your decision for Christ? And Action. A-I-D-A. Get out there - you got the prospects coming in. You think they came in to get out of the rain? A guy don't walk on the lot lest he wants to play. They're sitting out there waiting to give you their commitment . Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? What's the problem, pal? You - Mensa.

Mensa: You're such a hero, you're so rich, how come you're coming down here wasting your time with such a bunch of bums?

CDC: You see this suit? You see this suit?

Mensa: Yeah.

CDC: That suit costs more than your car. I fired 2 coaches last year. How many did you fire? You see, pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - coach! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get in a game? You don't like it, leave. I can go out there tonight with the materials you've got and beat a middling B1G team. Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can YOU? Go and do likewise. A-I-D-A. Get mad you son of a bitches, get mad. You want to know what it takes to win football games? It takes BRASS BALLS to win football games. Go and do likewise, gents. Money's out there. You pick it up, it's yours. You don't, I got no sympathy for you. You wanna go out in that game tonight and coach, COACH. It's yours. If not, you're gonna be shining my shoes. And you know what you'll be saying - a bunch of losers sittin' around in a bar. 'Oh yeah. I used to be a coach. It's a tough racket.' These are the new recruits. These are the 5 star recruits. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. They're for coaches. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it. And to answer your question, pal, why am I here? I came here because Red and Mack asked me to. They asked me for a favor. I said the real favor, follow my advice and fire your fucking ass, because a loser is a loser.

Tom I'm going to get right to the point. You just lost the most important game of your coaching career. .500 coaches don't survive at Texas.  You lose to TCU and you're done here. Now go win us some football games and I'll forget this conversation.  Hook 'em 

I support you 100%. Tell me how I can help.

Period. End of conversation. 

I would call him in and let him sit in awkward silence for an uncomfortable amount of time.  

 

When he finally asks if there is a reason for the meeting, I would tell him I had plenty of time to prepare what I was going to say but that I wanted him to know how I felt watching his team get a delay of game penalty on the first play of the season.  

 

Edited by runthebone

“Tom, we’re putting you in concussion protocol”

“You realize this is CFB, right? We don’t do pre-season games.”

“What in the wide wide world of sports is a goin’ on here? I hired you boys to win a few football games, not jump around like a buncha Kansas City faggots!”

(that’s my last one on here, I promise, I’m finally getting vented out.... I hope).

1 hour ago, VaHorn said:

I support you 100%. Tell me how I can help.

After we finished laughing at the reactionary idiots in our fanbase, it would go something like the above.

It might help your standing with the fan base if some nudes of your wife leaked.  Say her phone got hacked or something.  If you can't coach football, make yourself useful somehow.

Tommy, Ricky needs a body guard.  You up for that?

So Tom, I just got off the phone with Brett McMurphy. He asked for a comment on a story he is running that states

you knew all about Tim Beck's past and you not only hired him, but have enabled him while on your staff. 

 

 

3 hours ago, VaHorn said:

I support you 100%. Tell me how I can help you win at least eight games this year so that you can keep that support.

 

I prefer this version.  You have to set the expectations.

4 hours ago, Player said:

CDC: You're talking about what. You're talking about... Bitching about that second half lead you lost,some sonofabitch who don't don’t like your grill, some broad you're trying to screw, so forth. Let's talk about something important. They all here?

Fenves: All but one.

CDC: I'm going anyway. Let's talk about something important. Put. That coffee. Down. Coffee's for coaches only. You think I'm fucking with you? I am not fucking with you. I'm here from downtown. I'm here from Red and Mack. And I'm here on a mission of mercy. Your name's Herman? You call yourself a coach, you son of a bitch?

Oscar Giles: I don't gotta sit here and listen to this shit.

CDC: You certainly don't, pal, 'cause the good news is - you're fired. The bad news is - you've got, all of you've got just one week to regain your jobs starting with tonight. Starting with tonight's game. Oh? Have I got your attention now? Good. 'Cause we're adding a little something to this month's sales contest. As you all know, first prize is a Cadillac Eldorado. Anyone wanna see second prize? Second prize is a set of steak knives. Third prize is you're fired. Get the picture? You laughing now? You got recruits. Red paid good money, get their names to sign them; you can't close the recruits you're given, you can't close shit. You ARE shit! Hit the bricks, pal, and beat it 'cause you are going OUT!

Beck: The players are weak.

CDC: The players are weak? Fucking players are weak. You're weak! I've been in this business 15 years...

Mensa: What's your name?

CDC: Fuck you! That's my name! You know why, mister? You drove a Hyundai to get here. I drove an eighty-thousand dollar BMW. THAT'S my name. And your name is you're wanting. You can't play in the man's game, you can't coach them - go home and tell your wife your troubles. Because only one thing counts in this life: Get them to sign on the line which is dotted. You hear me, you fucking faggots? A-B-C. A-Always, B-Be, C-Coaching. Always be coaching. ALWAYS BE COACHING. A-I-D-A. Attention, Interest, Decision, Action. Attention - Do I have your attention? Interest - Are you interested? I know you are, 'cause it's fuck or walk. You coach or you hit the bricks. Decision - Have you made your decision for Christ? And Action. A-I-D-A. Get out there - you got the prospects coming in. You think they came in to get out of the rain? A guy don't walk on the lot lest he wants to play. They're sitting out there waiting to give you their commitment . Are you gonna take it? Are you man enough to take it? What's the problem, pal? You - Mensa.

Mensa: You're such a hero, you're so rich, how come you're coming down here wasting your time with such a bunch of bums?

CDC: You see this suit? You see this suit?

Mensa: Yeah.

CDC: That suit costs more than your car. I fired 2 coaches last year. How many did you fire? You see, pal, that's who I am, and you're nothing. Nice guy? I don't give a shit. Good father? Fuck you! Go home and play with your kids. You wanna work here - coach! You think this is abuse? You think this is abuse, you cocksucker? You can't take this, how can you take the abuse you get in a game? You don't like it, leave. I can go out there tonight with the materials you've got and beat a middling B1G team. Tonight! In two hours! Can you? Can YOU? Go and do likewise. A-I-D-A. Get mad you son of a bitches, get mad. You want to know what it takes to win football games? It takes BRASS BALLS to win football games. Go and do likewise, gents. Money's out there. You pick it up, it's yours. You don't, I got no sympathy for you. You wanna go out in that game tonight and coach, COACH. It's yours. If not, you're gonna be shining my shoes. And you know what you'll be saying - a bunch of losers sittin' around in a bar. 'Oh yeah. I used to be a coach. It's a tough racket.' These are the new recruits. These are the 5 star recruits. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you is just throwing them away. They're for coaches. I'd wish you good luck but you wouldn't know what to do with it if you got it. And to answer your question, pal, why am I here? I came here because Red and Mack asked me to. They asked me for a favor. I said the real favor, follow my advice and fire your fucking ass, because a loser is a loser.
 

Man that movie was unreal. Great flick and great reference. Kudos mofo. 

Hallo, my name is Chris Del Conte

You're killing my golden goose...prepare to die.  

'Do you want to be able to recruit offensive skill players?"

 

If so fire Tim Beck and never hire anyone from Nebraska again.

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