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  • I had mine yesterday and it looked clear. I woke up from my first one in 2016 to a worried-looking young doctor telling me I needed to go directly to imaging. Been cancer-free for eight years now. The

  • Gatorubet
    Gatorubet

    Three years ago I had a delayed colonoscopy (11 years).   Whoopsie. Stage III maybe IV colon cancer.   Still figuring it out.  Surgery (1/3 of colon taken out. Scar I say was a ‘knife wound’ around wo

  • Jerry Callo
    Jerry Callo

    For it to work correctly, I think you have to drink it.

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4 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I kind of wish they sold the prep over the counter.  A good cleansing every now and then seems like a good thing.

You’re in luck!

OTC scope prep:

4 Ducolax tablets by mouth followed 2 hours later with 238 gram bottle of MiraLax in 64 oz of clear liquid (ie Gatorade or G2). Mix well. Drink an 8 oz glass every 10-15 minutes until the entire bottle has been consumed.

Keep us updated of course.

7 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I kind of wish they sold the prep over the counter.  A good cleansing every now and then seems like a good thing.

It’s not the prep I want otc. It’s the Michael Jackson super sleep drug. 

procedure wasn't bad. Nurses were great, prep was the worst part. No dreaming for me , but when I came out of anesthesia, I looked at the nurse and told her she was very attractive (she was attractive). The wife let it go. 2 hours later I am good to go 

oh, they found a very small polyp and I'll know whats up with it next week. 

My procedure was a cake walk too. The worst part were the gas pains after from all the air trapped in there. Dr said everything looks fine so I should be set for another 5 years.

Propofol is insane - like someone else said in this thread - it's just like an off switch.

16 minutes ago, The Royal We said:

My procedure was a cake walk too. The worst part were the gas pains after from all the air trapped in there. Dr said everything looks fine so I should be set for another 5 years.

Propofol is insane - like someone else said in this thread - it's just like an off switch.

I forgot about that part !!!.  Yes , how much freaking air do they use?!? Finally got relief sitting down in a hot shower. About 15 minutes later I was better 

1 hour ago, nineliveslost said:

I forgot about that part !!!.  Yes , how much freaking air do they use?!? Finally got relief sitting down in a hot shower. About 15 minutes later I was better 

I had that problem 10 years ago and the nurses made sure I farted before they would let me leave.  This past summer, it wasn't an issue.  I didn't have gas and the nurses didn't even ask about it. I wonder if something about my doc's procedure has changed. 

1 hour ago, HouTex said:

I had that problem 10 years ago and the nurses made sure I farted before they would let me leave.  This past summer, it wasn't an issue.  I didn't have gas and the nurses didn't even ask about it. I wonder if something about my doc's procedure has changed. 

The nurse in post op must have been able to see it on my face and told me it was normal to have gas pains and that it was fine to pass gas in there. I didn't want to do the proverbial gamble-on-a-fart-and-lose trick so I waited until I got back to the friendly confines of my own bathroom to let it fly. Relief was immediate. 

Just now, The Royal We said:

The nurse in post op must have been able to see it on my face and told me it was normal to have gas pains and that it was fine to pass gas in there. I didn't want to do the proverbial gamble-on-a-fart-and-lose trick so I waited until I got back to the friendly confines of my own bathroom to let it fly. Relief was immediate. 

Avatar checks out.

1 hour ago, HouTex said:

I had that problem 10 years ago and the nurses made sure I farted before they would let me leave.  This past summer, it wasn't an issue.  I didn't have gas and the nurses didn't even ask about it. I wonder if something about my doc's procedure has changed. 

The attractive nurse told me to relax and let it go. I just couldn't do it in front of her. She knew I was struggling so she smiled and left the room for a couple of minutes. I maintained eye contact with my wife , grinned and farted the moment the nurse left. 

10 minutes ago, The Royal We said:

The nurse in post op must have been able to see it on my face and told me it was normal to have gas pains and that it was fine to pass gas in there. I didn't want to do the proverbial gamble-on-a-fart-and-lose trick so I waited until I got back to the friendly confines of my own bathroom to let it fly. Relief was immediate. 

Post colonoscopy farts are the only farts in your life that you can absolutely trust.  There's nothing left in there to make an oopsie.

On 5/23/2024 at 7:10 PM, CoTex said:

Woke up with a little soup in the chute.  Sprayed that out - clearish yellow.  Went to surgery center.

Anesthesia is really cool.  At first everything got weird / muffled.  I said “weird/muffled” and they said “that’s the —-caine.”  The other stuff may burn in your arm a little.  Then I said “I feel it in my arm…”. Then I woke up.

3 polyps.  Biopsies pending.  Glad I did it and as far as the doctor, nurses, everyone that cared for me - they were awesome.

For posterity:

1.  You do/can dream under anesthesia.  I did.

2.  I was afraid I would say something while woozy and my wife would hold that shit against me.  Not an issue - when I woke up I was in control.

3.  Anesthesia hits hard.  It’s not like “had one too many shots and went to sleep.”  More like a deer when the bulllet hits it before it ever hears a sound.  Out.

4.  Be nice to the nurses, etc., and odds are they will give you a smooth ride.  I can’t imagine what that would have been like if they were bitchy.

5.  I’ll go back as often as necessary.  Comparing it to a day in my normal life - not that bad.  Prep tastes like lemon flavored laguna madre water and you’ll squirt every ounce back out, but other than it’s just an inconvenience.

If this buys me 1 more year of life, 5 more years of life, 20?  Worth every bit of hassle.

You know how I know that you're a masochist without you telling me you're a masochist?

1 hour ago, Scheiss Meister said:

Post colonoscopy farts are the only farts in your life that you can absolutely trust.  There's nothing left in there to make an oopsie.

Not 100% true.  I went for a nice brunch after my procedure and before chowing down made a stop in the restroom to "decompress", and it came out a bit "lubey".

I had my pre-screen last week. I want to get this done before the end of the year for deductible reasons.  I took their last appointment on 12/31. Happy new year to my butt!

 

For a bonus….  I mentioned that I have trouble swallowing sometimes. He added an endoscopy down my throat to the procedure. I’ve met my deductible so why not. 
 

I just hope they wash that snake between orifices!

 

 

Edited by Elvis

27 minutes ago, Guadaloopy said:

Not 100% true.  I went for a nice brunch after my procedure and before chowing down made a stop in the restroom to "decompress", and it came out a bit "lubey".

Uh oh.  They must have gone no lube on me, because I had nothing but air for almost 24 hours.

I did learn to include some live culture yogurt or home fermented sauerkraut in a couple of meals after the procedure to help fortify the gut bugs.  I didn't after my first one and had some gut trouble for a few days.

Relaxing with a little tenderness on the back end from a couple polyps that got removed.  Starving so had my wife hit up Chick-fil-A for bfast right afterwards and about to go demolish some Tex Mex shortly.

 

propofal ftw

  • 1 month later...

One of the not fun parts of field work is taking a shit in a port-a-potty with crazy strong winds shaking the shit out of you, and everything else. We refer to it as riding the rocket. 

I started Gavilyte a few hours ago and the taste isn't that bad with the lemon flavoring, but I'm riding the rocket tonight.

Procedure is in 10 hours and I'm fucking starving. Chicken broth earlier, about to have green jello and a different brand of chicken broth for dinner for variety. 

If this is the worst of it, I'm really glad I'm finally doing this. It's not fun, but much better than I expected. 

 

You know how you can flush a toilet by quickly dumping a bucket of water into it?

Y'all, I just did that with my ass. Came out with so much force, it smashed back and hit 2/3 of the way up the lid. Not the seat. The lid. 

I did think it was pretty considerate of me to courtesy flush for myself. 

On 12/19/2024 at 8:06 AM, nnm said:

It’s not the prep I want otc. It’s the Michael Jackson super sleep drug. 

Prophyrol is the anasthetic of choice, right.  Had it for each of my three rope-n-scopes.  That was some fine Cloud 9 shitand that’s no lie. Then there’s the whole OD and death negative side effect, which mitigates vs the euphoria.  Prince’s ghost is holding on Line 2.

On 12/19/2024 at 12:20 PM, HouTex said:

I had that problem 10 years ago and the nurses made sure I farted before they would let me leave.  This past summer, it wasn't an issue.  I didn't have gas and the nurses didn't even ask about it. I wonder if something about my doc's procedure has changed. 

should this crossreffed in the Shart Thread

  • 2 weeks later...

Got my fluid change this morning and I'm good for another 10.

Regarding the prep, my instructions were for the Miralax chug, and I'm guessing they default to that because it's cheap and readily available, and so they don't have to deal with stupid insurance companies and denials.

Since I have a stupid insurance company and I really don't like or drink gatorade or sweetened/artificially sweetened stuff, I asked my GI to give me a script for the Sutab pill prep.  Naturally, my stupid insurance wouldn't cover it, but I found basically an online promo code that cut it down from $187 to like $50.  I can't make a direct comparison, but just drinking a bunch of water seems a lot more pleasant than the liquid preps.  It was well worth the $50 and I'd probably even cough up the full price if needed.

And as for propofol, yes it's perfect for a procedure like this (disclaimer: no nurse paystub).  Ask what you're getting, and if you're having any anxiety about anesthesia that's what you want.  The lights go out and the lights come back on, no groggy liminal states or hangovers.  It's stupid IMO that they tell you not to drive afterward.  Due to short staffing they said they were running one room with versed/fentanyl, and I noped out of that right quick.

The most difficult thing for me was getting it scheduled, which is why I was overdue.  So throw out your own excuses and get this done, it's easy and it's important.

  • 1 month later...

Got a random text the other day from my gastroenterologist that they received a referral from my PCP that my time has come for the next round.  I called them right back, they said the next available appointment was in late June.  Basically printing money I guess.  

11 minutes ago, Jerry Callo said:

Assholes are like opinions - everybody has one. 

I read that in Joe Pesci's voice.

Sounds similar to what I experienced last year- when I scheduled mine the first appointments were 2-3 months out. 

  • 3 months later...

I actually was having some second thoughts on the orange - my instructions say that jello is OK as long as it's not red or purple. Orange is close to red, but it's not exactly a niche jello color and you'd think they'd say it explicitly if they're listing which colors of jello not to eat.

Was kinda joking.

I made orange, red and purple jello the day before.

A nurse called to verify the appointment and to make sure I was doing everything right. I mentioned I made some jello. She said make sure you only eat clear jello.

After the call I looked back at the directions and it said jello was fine, and didn't mention anything about color. 

So I'm not really sure what the rules are. 

10 hours ago, blacklab said:

Was kinda joking.

I made orange, red and purple jello the day before.

A nurse called to verify the appointment and to make sure I was doing everything right. I mentioned I made some jello. She said make sure you only eat clear jello.

After the call I looked back at the directions and it said jello was fine, and didn't mention anything about color. 

So I'm not really sure what the rules are. 

No red or purple.  Orange, Lemon, and Lime are fine.

nurse was not amused when I asked for a wallet print of my appendiceal orifice

Guess who gets to have his next colonoscopy on his birthday in a couple of weeks.  Yay me!  At least I'll get a good nap and big lunch on my birthday.

On 7/12/2025 at 12:19 AM, Scheiss Meister said:

Guess who gets to have his next colonoscopy on his birthday in a couple of weeks.  Yay me!  At least I'll get a good nap and big lunch on my birthday.

When I got my first one 5 years ago, it was 25 miles away and they were adamant I have someone drive me there and back.  My doctor wife was working 25-28 days a month at her hospital and told me to schedule it on one of the few days off she had scheduled...her 35th birthday.  

I booked in first, which means we had to get up at 4am on one of her only days off so she could cool her heels in the parking lot (COVID, remember?) while I got probed.  The doc actually came out into the parking lot to give the prelim details and schedule the follow-up appointment like a car-hop.

I felt bad, but, for whatever reason, she loves me and was happy to do it.  When I got in the car, she asked, "How do you feel?  What do you need?"

I said, "Take me to Whataburger."

That 9am Double-Meat Double-Cheese w/ Jalapenos, Large Fries, and Vanilla Malt hit so hard.  And then...the nap.  The resulting gas was glorious.  Happy Birthday, baby!

Good times.....

Edited by After irth

2 hours ago, After irth said:

When I got my first one 5 years ago, it was 25 miles away and they were adamant I have someone drive me there and back.  My doctor wife was working 25-28 days a month at her hospital and told me to schedule it on one of the few days off she had scheduled...her 35th birthday.  

I booked in first, which means we had to get up at 4am on one of her only days off so she could cool her heels in the parking lot (COVID, remember?) while I got probed.  The doc actually came out into the parking lot to give the prelim details and schedule the follow-up appointment like a car-hop.

I felt bad, but, for whatever reason, she loves me and was happy to do it.  When I got in the car, she asked, "How do you feel?  What do you need?"

I said, "Take me to Whataburger."

That 9am Double-Meat Double-Cheese w/ Jalapenos, Large Fries, and Vanilla Malt hit so hard.  And then...the nap.  The resulting gas was glorious.  Happy Birthday, baby!

Good times.....

Nice humble brag on the 15-years your junior wife. 

16 hours ago, nnm said:

Nice humble brag on the 15-years your junior wife. 

Yep...she's awesome!  She was 25, I was 40.  Who knew?  That was 2011.....

Edited by After irth

On 7/11/2025 at 3:44 PM, Celery Man said:

nurse was not amused when I asked for a wallet print of my appendiceal orifice

I got some color photos in my post-probe packet. 

I have them saved to my phone's photo gallery so I can send them to my friends when the occasion calls for it.

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Author
26 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Didn’t pay attention to a word she said. 

I didn't.  I was focused on those

spacer.png

On 7/29/2025 at 4:45 PM, Underdog said:

Didn’t pay attention to a word she said. 

She was talking?

  • 2 weeks later...

I had my consultation this morning and I’m scheduled for 2 weeks. Looking forward to dropping a couple lbs at least. 

Mrs NNM has her procedure Tuesday. They gave her the 2-liter bottle. What’s the alternative stuff which is far less unpleasant?  I’m going to have her call and ask for that. 

  • 2 weeks later...

I'm doing this on 9/11.  Not looking forward to the prep but I've had to prep twice before, last time during Christmas of 2023, so at least this time I won't be staring at the family eating lamb and rib roast while I'm gazing into my green jello and chicken broth.

They wheeled me back to my waiting wife afterwards. Apparently I told the Dr ‘so I heard you are into butt stuff’ coming out of the anesthesia. 

Good for ten years. Prep wasn’t nearly as bad as I expected. Lack of food and sleep was worse. 

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