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she invites me up, at twelve o’clock at night, for coffee.  and I don’t go up... ‘no thank you, I don’t want coffee, it keeps me up.’  too late for me to drink coffee.  I said this to her.  people this stupid shouldn’t be allowed to live. 

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I love him fumbling with the alka-seltzer and pepto bismol through that little monologue. ^^^^^

edit: damn, got biff’d.  I’m referring to the coffee quote.

Edited by futureman

4 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said:

He’s “it”. He wins. 

do over!  start with him. 

11 hours ago, McCroskey said:

I can't believe I'm gonna be a mailman!

Mail on Sunday?

5 minutes ago, NorthLoop said:

Too many people got their mail 

No body from the post office has ever cracked the 50% barrier! It's like the 3-minute mile!

You said it’d be a postman I know, and you’re a postman I know!!!

I mean, just imagine, an army of men in wool pants running around the neighborhood handing out pottery catalogs, door to door. 

12 minutes ago, Lobo said:

You said it’d be a postman I know, and you’re a postman I know!!!

Mailman, but yes.

Shouldn't the bucket be on your head?  

I've got no choice but to go down there!  and talk to them. 

ah, the timeless art of seduction. 

1 hour ago, pokeNbeans said:

"Is everything all right here, Postal Employee Newman?"

"Yes sir, i believe everything is all squared away.  Isn't it, Mr. Kramer?"

all right, look, I’m gonna be honest.  I’m very interested in the van. 

Ok, fine, what do I have to do to put you in this van today?

It says here, "Interesting trades considered..." 

7 hours ago, Lobo said:

It says here, "Interesting trades considered..." 

you put that in!

Because, you know...I live in New York City

george, we’ve had it with you.  we love you like a son but even parents have limits. 

We’re going to a catered affair!

my wife has a beautifully feminine but strong voice with a non descriptive midwestern accent:  she can’t do impressions of anyone, male or female, to save her life.   But she can fucking nail that Frank Costanza line every time.  

Wouldn't you....like to be a big brother.....to someone.....like me?

Who lives in Paris!

I base my whole life on knowing that the D is the biggest.

13 hours ago, McCroskey said:

I base my whole life on knowing that the D is the biggest.

All right, what else? You got the cups in the front, two loops in the back. All right, a guess that's about it.

42 minutes ago, futureman said:

have you seen the new addition to the guggenheim?

You did that?

He's the Wiz!  And nobody beats him...

Listen to the bell, Grossbard. It tolls for thee. 

He tried to lam, but they cheesed  him

Is it because of my lazy eye?

jerry!  we’ve lost the fat man and we’re runnin’ lean!  we’re back on track, buddy!

Come on. What's the big deal? Just gonna put a little concrete in the washing machine.

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