May 21, 20187 yr Kramer: What's today? Newman: It's Thursday. Kramer: Really? Feels like Tuesday. Newman: Tuesday has no feel. Monday has a feel, Friday has a feel, Sunday has a feel.... Kramer: I feel Tuesday and Wednesday... Jerry: All right, shut up the both of you! You're making me nervous.
May 21, 20187 yr ^ reminds me of Kramer telling Elaine he doesn't need a watch or clock to tell tim. "Well what do you do when the sun's not out?"
May 21, 20187 yr 6 hours ago, Lobo said: ^ reminds me of Kramer telling Elaine he doesn't need a watch or clock to tell tim. "Well what do you do when the sun's not out?" well, night’s tougher. but it’s only a couple of hours.
May 22, 20187 yr You know that sound the can makes when you open it? That's the sound of you buying a whole can.
May 22, 20187 yr The presidency attracts the badly named. Their ambition is based on personal insecurities. It's classic male overcompensation.
May 22, 20187 yr Jerry, this is the way society functions. Aren't you a part of society? Because if you don't want to be a part of society, Jerry, why don't you just get in your car and move to the EAST SIDE!
May 23, 20187 yr Kramer goes to a fantasy camp. His whole life is a fantasy camp. People should plunk down two-thousand dollars to live like him for a week. Do nothing, fall ass-backwards into money, mooch food off your neighbors, and have sex without dating. *That's* a fantasy camp!
May 23, 20187 yr 5 minutes ago, Biff Tannen said: Hey that sounds like one of those old-timey car horns. K-OOOGER! George, come in. I’m just going over our annual report…boy did we take it on the chin last year.
May 24, 20187 yr Hey, guess what! Little Jerry ran from here to Newman's in under thirty seconds! Is that good? I don't know.
May 24, 20187 yr 9 hours ago, Cheeseweasel said: George, come in. I’m just going over our annual report…boy did we take it on the chin last year. Check it out, George... All me, no hands!
May 24, 20187 yr George, come in. I’m just going over our annual report…boy did we take it on the chin last year.I’m not too worried about it.Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
May 26, 20187 yr I will never understand the bathrooms in this country. Why is it that the doors on the stalls do not come all the way down to the floor?
May 26, 20187 yr how am I gonna fill two hours? -hello? I can take an hour off your hands. give the kids a chance to see a real live yankee. and give you the chance to see some real disappointed kids.
May 29, 20187 yr I love a good nap. Sometimes it's the only thing getting me out of bed in the morning.
May 29, 20187 yr In closing, these stories have not been embellished, because - they need no embellishment. They are simply, horrifyingly, the story of my life as a short, stocky, slow witted bald man.
May 30, 20187 yr PUDDY: Let’s finish this up. JERRY: Did you two break up? PUDDY: That chick’s whacked. We’re history. I just left out a couple of things: rust-proofing.. JERRY: "Rust-proofing"? PUDDY: Transport charge, storage surcharge, additional overcharge, finder’s fee JERRY: "Finder’s fee"? It was on the lot! PUDDY: Yeah, that’s right. Floor mats, keys.. JERRY: ‘Keys"?! PUDDY: How ya gonna start it?
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