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2025 game Week 1, #1 Texas @ #3 Ohio State - What the Fuck is a Buckeye?

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We are going to kick this off Saturday night instead of the usual Sunday morning because we don’t have any data points from Texas playing a game to incorporate into the weekly preview. 
Texas is undefeated and hasn’t played a game. So, of course, we are 10 feet tall and bullet proof. Is this true?  Yes!  
Look, for any of our fans who don’t get it, we are about to see our best defense since 1983. We have a Manning under center. We have the best offensive coordinator in college football. This is all designed to freaking kick ass and take names. 
Usually, in a big game, I spend a lot of time mocking and ridiculing the opposite team and fan base, but I’m not going there with this game. I’m not going to bring up the fact that they are a bunch of meth addict, jort wearing, community college, townie drop outs. I’m not going to make the point that they cheat. I’m not going to bring up the fact that they are the worst combination of degenerate southern dipshits and midwestern morons. I’m not going to point out that in a conference full of academically good schools they are the clown college. I’m just going to say that winning in the shoe, morning or night, is something Texas is absolutely at home doing. 
Their frosh QB is going to see ghosts. Their basically new defense is going to get shredded. We are going to fuck their shit up. 
Texas 31, Ohio State 13. Eat a bag of dicks Buckeyes. 

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  • Hagbard Celine
    Hagbard Celine

    just in case you are not aware of the circumstances and facts regarding this topic..... the date for saturday's game, 30 august 2025, was contracted 2 years ago during the negotiations between Te

  • hornbri
    hornbri

    Why the fuck not. 

  • InkaUtexas
    InkaUtexas

Posted Images

I'm sad you chose not to point out the Kentucky hill billy limited gene pool redneck jackass aspects of their fan base, but since you aren't shit bagging them I get it.

Texas wins a tough one with Sayin taking 2 sacks and throwing 1 INT. Arch has this board going full jizz jar by the 2nd quarter and Baxter jumps up shocking everyone with a long rushing TD.

28-21 Texas beats fuck nuts no lube.

Edited by BurntEyes

  • Author
7 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

I'm sad you chose not to point out the Kentucky hill billy limited gene pool redneck jackass aspects of their fan base, but since you aren't shit bagging them I get it.

Texas wins a tough one with Sayin taking 2 sacks and throwing 1 INT. Arch has this board going full jizz jar by the 2nd quarter and Baxter jumps up shocking everyone with a long rushing TD.

28-21 Texas beats fuck nuts no lube.

By all means post it!  This is a collaborative effort. 

5 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

By all means post it!  This is a collaborative effort. 

Remember, don't be racist! Hill billy rednecks come in all shapes, sizes and colors.

ohio-state-fan.jpg.1c859034f79719b4fff79cc050ad0f86.jpgtennessee-v-ohio-state-playoff-first-round.thumb.jpg.901d816bed871d3c6653977a5ac10906.jpgstay-classy-ohio-there-are-things-that-go-too-far-and-this-v0-pzrdajjetk8e1.thumb.jpeg.71dd5c96293702c26985c6907d1d87c5.jpeg

  • immamac changed the title to 2025 game Week 1, #1 Texas @ #3 Ohio State - What the Fuck is a Buckeye?

I think we're gonna win this game, and we might win it by 14+.

I don't care how good ther new QB is, he's green.  If we can get to him OR confuse him with coverages, mistakes are coming.  And what are the odds we can't do either?

But, TexArcher, can't they say all the same stuff about Arch?  Sure, until he rips off a couple of 20-yard runs.  He's got almost the same get-out-of-jail-free card that VY had.

We're gonna run it.

Im Not as confident as yall are. Both sides are replacing a fuck ton of talent. I hope we don’t run toss sweep on 1st and goal. I want this post to be ridiculed after we mudhole them 

It's very kind of you not to mention their deep-seated hatred for couches and the accompanying pyromaniacal tendencies.

30-13 good guys. 🤘

I think we win by 10-14 but I don’t know shit and it’s the first game. 

something new in the universe for this game:

this week, i've talked to fans of pedder, uga, 0u, north carolina, michigan and cal

all of them want to see us win

michigan is natural

but with the others i was in shock and had to act non-chalant

i didn't ask why, just took the win and thanked them

2 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

I'm sad you chose not to point out the Kentucky hill billy limited gene pool redneck jackass aspects of their fan base, but since you aren't shit bagging them I get it.

They truly are a trashy fanbase. Tons of inbreds with no direct connection to the school but are loyal because someone in their family once lived in Ohio. 

Fuck Ohio State. 

In the ass. 

With a 24” spiked dildo. 

No lube.

Our D-line and their O-Line are each team's strengths, so I expect a low scoring game. First to 20 points wins.

Texas wins 24-17

Energy levels will be high at the kickoff.  But Energy is a Texas business, our squad will operate as a well oil machine.  Horns will not panic but will just take care business.  fucknuts hang in until the 3rd and then die on the vine.  

We win 30-21.  Lights out for Ryan Day. 

Honestly I have no idea what to expect. Our OL is very worrisome, Baxter back from injury, new WR’s, new TE has me wondering what the offense will look like. I think our defense will have to carry us till the offense figures it out. I’ve got a Texas 17 osu 13 type of game.

Shhhhhhheeeeeweet....

Mudhole.

 

Texas smothers the Buckeyes and then rolls! 

Texas 31, OSU 9

Long range forecast. High of 77, 5 % chance precip. Fat man's paradise.

  • Popular Post

NSIAP

TEXAS 27

tOSU 13

 

Edited by DFW Horn
* Prediction

Is this board getting less gay or were there really no references to forcing anal sex on the other team in OP?

  • Author

Note- this isn’t the actual prediction thread- that will come later. This is the game week news, talk etc spot. 

Both teams struggle to move the ball in the first half. Ohio State pulls away late. Missed FGs and poor special teams play cost Texas in the end. 


Ohio State 20

Texas 13

  • Popular Post

Satya Jr strikes 

8 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

Both teams struggle to move the ball in the first half. Ohio State pulls away late. Missed FGs and poor special teams play cost Texas in the end. 


Ohio State 20

Texas 13

boo-boo-this-man.gif

Jeff Banks is ass. His special teams will concede a fake punt or fake FG.

Edited by 6th Street

  • Popular Post
10 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

Both teams struggle to move the ball in the first half. Ohio State pulls away late. Missed FGs and poor special teams play cost Texas in the end. 


Ohio State 20

Texas 13

This is the thread where we all talk shit about OSU and why we're going to ramrod them sans lube. Also acceptable entries are couching burning smack, Ohio Man shitting, even perhaps bad mouthing Cleveland river fires would be acceptable.

Please take your sandy vagina, CumNut gurgling shit takes elsewhere.

We thank you for your attention to this matter.

Cross posting.  Long read.  I’ve been listening to podcast after podcast.  I’m fully convinced we are going to make a statement this Saturday.  The media is now shifting to picking Ohio State.  Texas has some big advantages in this game.  Ohio State is coming in with more question marks and being given the benefit of doubt.

 

Passing game:  Sayin, while talented is making his first start agains possibly the best defense he may see in his entire college football career.  Howard brought 5 years of experience and a dual threat ability to escape our pass rush in the semi final game.  He had two stud RBs to take the pressure off of him.  Sayin won’t have those and is going to be on a leash.  Day is not going to give the dude a green light to sling it against PK and this defense.  They will gameplan to get the ball out quick to Smith and rely on their run game.   PK is going to bracket Smith, load the box, and dare Sayin to get the ball out quick to their other WRs.  
 

Arch is coming in being in his 3rd year and has been in pressure situations in big games.   His ability to run, his rocket arm, and his ability to read a defense is going to put Ohio State on skates.  They aren’t playing against Quinn where you could devote numbers to the run game with little to no fear of Quinn running or hitting a deep shot.  We are going to have a numbers advantage in the run game and their safeties are going to have to account for getting beat deep.  Endries should have a big fucking game with the conflict their LBs and safeties are going to be put in.


Run Game:  Texas has shut down nearly every teams run game over the last 2 years with completely different personnel at DT in both years.  This year may be the best group of run defenders from a depth perspective . Good luck to their OL going up against this front 7.   With out a mobile QB and 2 stud RBs, they are going to have to push this Dline around to make holes.  I don’t see that happening and I don’t see them surpassing 100 yards on the ground. 
 

Texas is going to lean on the interior 3 guards and their strengths.  Ohio state is 1 deep at DT.  Tire them out and we are going to see a similar 2nd half like we saw at Michigan where we control the clock and run it right at them.   I don’t see us going deep and trying to beat their secondary in 1 on 1s.  Being on the road, we are going to see if they have enough bodies for a fist fight for 4 Quarters.   
 

Coordinators:  new DC and new OC.  Knowles and Schumann may be the only 2 DCs I’d take over PK and I’d have to really think about it.  Well, Knowles isn’t there anymore.  You could argue Chip Kelly was the reason for their run late in the year.  He’s not there either.  Texas has a huge advantage here

 

Conclusion:  It took Ohio State a fluke 75 yard screen pass TD before half and a strip sack-TD to win against Texas last year.  They had the more talented team and that game was won over 2 plays.  Texas is walking in with an advantage at QB, defense, and schemes.  Unless Texas shoots itself in the foot with penalties and turnovers, I do not see how Ohio State is going to find a push in their run game to alleviate the pressure Sayin is going to put in if they are in predictable passing situations.  They also lack depth at DT against a team that is going to come in and run it right at you.  My prediction is 10-7 at half time and 24-17 final score.  The score will make it look closer but Texas is going to control this game.  

 

NSIAP

Most apropos statistic is that QBs starting for first time against #1 team have lost, every. single. game.

I think that continues. Make it 19-0 and nothing but Ls for the virgin QBs.

Hook'em

 

  • Popular Post
39 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

Both teams struggle to move the ball in the first half. Ohio State pulls away late. Missed FGs and poor special teams play cost Texas in the end. 


Ohio State 20

Texas 13

image.gif.64b9874875f6ff981472d30540d2ec76.gif

48 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

Both teams struggle to move the ball in the first half. Ohio State pulls away late. Missed FGs and poor special teams play cost Texas in the end. 


Ohio State 20

Texas 13

A 7 point loss equates to "pulls away"?

And picking special teams to cost us a game on a team where we significantly upgraded both K and P is... a choice.

3 hours ago, DaysOff said:

Long range forecast. High of 77, 5 % chance precip. Fat man's paradise.

Texas will be flying around out there. It’s like someone turned on the AC for them. 

16 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

NSIAP

Most apropos statistic is that QBs starting for first time against #1 team have lost, every. single. game.

I think that continues. Make it 19-0 and nothing but Ls for the virgin QBs.

Hook'em

 

Sayins first meaningful snaps against this defense? With a new coordinator? I like our chances

Methinks Texas will be eschewing field goals in lieu of touchdowns vs OSU.  Goodbye, Columbus, and your Bugs Bunny cartoon spats-wearing march too fast limbo drum major band. If I have to hear a fight song overplayed, let it be Texas Fight! early and often.

Horns 28

Nuts 11

I feel good about this team and this season. Ohio State will be a great barometer to find out where this team is from a maturity standpoint. I think it's the most talented roster Texas will have fielded possibly ever, and that's saying something coming off of last season where there has been plenty of NFL level production that was lost. 

If the team can put together a clean (no turnovers, no 3 and outs) half, it's likely going to be a blowout. 

It’s no coincidence our 2005 and 2025 teams both had big early season tests on the road in Columbus.

Texas Journey GIF
 

Same outcome at the end of the season 

Edited by Js1

3 minutes ago, immamac said:

If the team can put together a clean (no turnovers, no 3 and outs) half, it's likely going to be a blowout. 

I think it's more like Meatchicken, not exactly blowout, mudhole level, but they're never really seriously in the game. 

HOOK'EM

Just now, VABuckeye said:

You had a tuneup game in 2005.

Playing our 2nd team in scrimmage is the tuneup 😉 

I predict more o-line penalty calls than points, and we still kick their ass!

44 minutes ago, Bama Llama said:

Methinks Texas will be eschewing field goals in favor of touchdowns vs OSU.  Goodbye, Columbus, and your Bugs Bunny cartoon spats-wearing march too fast limbo drum major band. If I have to hear a fight song overplayed, let it be Texas Fight! early and often.

Horns 28

Nuts 11

Fify

 

34 minutes ago, VABuckeye said:

You had a tuneup game in 2005.

So did you.

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