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2025 game Week 1, #1 Texas @ #3 Ohio State - What the Fuck is a Buckeye?

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How the fuck did Barry Switzer join the chat? 

this thread with the Ewers thread man get the fucking season started already. 
 

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  • Hagbard Celine
    Hagbard Celine

    just in case you are not aware of the circumstances and facts regarding this topic..... the date for saturday's game, 30 august 2025, was contracted 2 years ago during the negotiations between Te

  • hornbri
    hornbri

    Why the fuck not. 

  • InkaUtexas
    InkaUtexas

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Just now, DFW Horn said:

Did he make the Cardinals roster? I don't follow the NFL much.

I read that every player drafted made the final roster. 

4 minutes ago, Red Five said:

IT has some team notes today. Nothing groundbreaking, but they did say that Cole Brevard has recently been elevated to first team at DT. I suppose with the either January or Watson.

Brevard is getting a lot of snaps because we have to be able to stop the run up front to allow us to bracket and shade Smith and even Claire or another receiver if needed. 

If our defense is ready and has their communication and scheme down? There's a lot we can do to fuck Sayin up

17 minutes ago, Pig Bellmont said:

Covering -6.5 against home dogs, Cinci, on a Thursday night? I can’t tell you one thing about either roster but man I don’t know 

I can tell you this, Cincinnati isn’t a home dog. It’s a neutral site game at Arrowhead, which completely favor Nebraska. 

24 minutes ago, Red Five said:


I am not a normal human when it comes to this stuff. Those words could never leave my mouth. Or my phone.

Well A&M does play OU sometimes. 

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6 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

Well A&M does play OU sometimes. 

And that is when we root for meteor

30 minutes ago, Red Five said:


I am not a normal human when it comes to this stuff. Those words could never leave my mouth. Or my phone.

I won’t go so far as to say you’re perfectly normal,  but it’s not because of this behavior. 
 

Park Gothic is just weak. 

23 minutes ago, DFW Horn said:

No

If Hayden Connor can play a competent LG in this league, so can Stroh. The guy is fucking massive - just look at this guy. He's what you get if the Jolly Green Giant and Bigfoot procreate.

Offensive Guard, Texas Longhorns - NIL ...

Listen, am I going to have to explain to you how camera angles work?

Just now, SydneyCarton said:

Listen, am I going to have to explain to you how camera angles work?

He's 6'7", 340 lbs.

Camera angles don't matter with this monstrosity.

18 minutes ago, troph said:

 

How the fuck did Barry Switzer join the chat? 

this thread with the Ewers thread man get the fucking season started already. 
 

Well, someone posted a tweet with screenshots between Barry Switzer and Archie Manning, who are friends. 

Just now, DFW Horn said:

He's 6'7", 340 lbs.

Camera angles don't matter with this monstrosity.

Sure. That doesn’t mean camera angles also don’t matter. The right camera angle can probably make BO&W look 5’7”, maybe even 5’8” if he’s wearing his lifts. 

16 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I can tell you this, Cincinnati isn’t a home dog. It’s a neutral site game at Arrowhead, which completely favor Nebraska. 

Found THIS Homer breakdown on the Husker thread. Would be curious about your thoughts as it seemed like a good one to me. However, I don't know what I don't know and it was a homer.

12 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

Well, someone posted a tweet with screenshots between Barry Switzer and Archie Manning, who are friends. 

What The Fuck Wtf GIF

52 minutes ago, DFW Horn said:

You can say that about Goosby's two starts, too, if you look at PFF's grades. But, we're all salivating over his potential. I believe in him, too, FWIW.

There is a bit of a difference there. You put your best pass protector at LT and hope he is a competent run blocker. Pass pro is the biggest responsibility of the position. Usually your best run blockers at Guard and hope they are competent pass protectors. Though Sark and Flood do not agree. They seem to be pass protectors first across the OL

Edited by Codaxx

28 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

Listen, am I going to have to explain to you how camera angles work?

You have the rapt attention of multiple 14 year olds reading this thread waiting to find out how to up their dick pic game, and you’re just going to leave them hanging?

386FA8C8-F8C3-4FDC-A2A3-038F4FFC8875.gif

2 minutes ago, Codaxx said:

There is a bit of a difference there. You put your best pass protector at LT and hope he is a competent run blocker. It is the biggest responsibility of the position. Usually your best run blockers on Guard and hope they are competent pass protectors. Though Sark and Flood do not agree

True, but my point was Goosby didn't grade as well run-blocking and there's no reason Stroh can't be as good as Conner. If we rank OL by importance in today's game, it's;

  1. LT
  2. C
  3. RT
  4. G's
11 hours ago, closetojumping said:

Cardale Jones. 

Reuben Foster is a wifebeater, so him knocking out a defenseless person is par for the course, I suppose. 

I enjoyed the stories, in any event. 

I stand corrected on name of OSU monster QB.

Foster didn’t draw the flag. His tackle was hard but textbook and in the open field.  It was the numbnuts reserve db playing on kickoff coverage team who did the taunting and changed the entire trajectory of the game.

Don’t taunt a downed buckeye.  Must’ve been a Big 12 crew.

1 minute ago, IDIOTsavant said:

You have the rapt attention of multiple 14 year olds reading this thread waiting to find out how to up their dick pic game, and you’re just going to leave them hanging?

386FA8C8-F8C3-4FDC-A2A3-038F4FFC8875.gif

The obvious answer is rent a midget to hold it. 
 

Also the only person under 27 reading this thread is @texifornia

35 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

Found THIS Homer breakdown on the Husker thread. Would be curious about your thoughts as it seemed like a good one to me. However, I don't know what I don't know and it was a homer.

Moved my response to the Week One CFB thread. 

Edited by closetojumping

Unfortunately no. He's got to travel by trailer and they don't like him to be in the trailer for more than 7 or 8 hours a day. That means the trip up to and back from Columbus would take like 6 days. Hard to justify taking Bevo's team on the road for that amount of time, especially since many of them are students who's school year is just starting. 

I’ll never understand why some big cigar can’t step up and just get him on a C-130 for 3 hours…
1 hour ago, PatSolitanojr said:

 

Lol

Thinking about Switzer rooting for a team reminds me of watching his coach's shows back in the day. Coaches' shows were invariably boring as all get out. Slocum's, for example, were about as fun as watching paint dry.

But Switzer was one hell of an entertainer. He'd be watching the highlights like it's live and his comments could affect the outcome, just like a fan. Probably the same charisma he used to fuck Larry Lacewell's wife and to get Eve to eat the apple. 

2 minutes ago, Party_Taco said:


I’ll never understand why some big cigar can’t step up and just get him on a C-130 for 3 hours…

Big Cigar talk gives me flashbacks to a football talk era I try not to think about.

6 minutes ago, Party_Taco said:


I’ll never understand why some big cigar can’t step up and just get him on a C-130 for 3 hours…

Always remember there's nothing easier in this world than spending someone else's money.

1 minute ago, SL Xpress said:

Always remember there's nothing easier in this world than spending someone else's money.

Idk, I find it easy as hell to spend my own on crap

1 minute ago, Js1 said:

Idk, I find it easy as hell to spend my own on crap

I'm really glad I quit drinking before Amazon deliveries really became a thing.

5 minutes ago, SL Xpress said:

But Switzer was one hell of an entertainer.

His post-game interviews for the Cowboys were fantastic. Would lose it almost every time.

2 hours ago, closetojumping said:

Where is this notion that Patricia was brought in to be some sort of Ohio State scheme caretaker coming from? Bucknuts is talking daily about how their insiders tell them that Patricia is pushing forward "his install" and crafting up "new exotics" to confuse the Texas OL and Manning. 

I remember people saying this about Martindale at Michigan last year. He had no answer for Sark’s game plan. 

49 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:

Sure. That doesn’t mean camera angles also don’t matter. The right camera angle can probably make BO&W look 5’7”, maybe even 5’8” if he’s wearing his lifts. 

Imma kick you in the dick 

18 minutes ago, DFW Horn said:

True, but my point was Goosby didn't grade as well run-blocking and there's no reason Stroh can't be as good as Conner. If we rank OL by importance in today's game, it's;

  1. LT
  2. C
  3. RT
  4. G's

Goosby did struggle in run blocking, but he had the off-season to improve on it. He also started vs A&M and Georgia, so his intro was vs NFL draft picks. That also makes his 0 sacks and 1 QB hit that much more impressive. 
 

Agree on importance. 

5 minutes ago, Billy Pilgrim said:

I remember people saying this about Martindale at Michigan last year. He had no answer for Sark’s game plan. 

Martindale struggled early in the season. Michigan fans said “3rd and Wink”. He did adjust and lot of that was pairing down the playbook, especially the complex blitzes 

Edited by Codaxx

6 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Imma kick you in the dick 

Wanna borrow my step ladder?

11 minutes ago, Billy Pilgrim said:

I remember people saying this about Martindale at Michigan last year. He had no answer for Sark’s game plan. 

Correct, which is why I find the stuff about Patricia amusing. 

I remember people saying this about Martindale at Michigan last year. He had no answer for Sark’s game plan. 
Wink Martindale was brought in specifically for continuity though. The last 3 Michigan DCs have all come from the Baltimore Ravens staff: Mike Macdonald, Jesse Minter, and now Wink Martindale.
1 hour ago, DFW Horn said:

No

If Hayden Connor can play a competent LG in this league, so can Stroh. The guy is fucking massive - just look at this guy. He's what you get if the Jolly Green Giant and Bigfoot procreate.

Offensive Guard, Texas Longhorns - NIL ...

 

That fucking thing right there, in whose shadow nothing good nor godly will ever fucking grow. He is of mixed religion, therefore he is godless. He was adopted by Satan himself before he was returned out of fear of his awkwardness. But he's impossible to marry off due to his lethal dimensions. His mother, terrified, she's fucking abandoned him. And there he is, stood before you like the first of some brand-new fucking species! Any man that you put before him, right, it'd be like entering a fucking threshing machine, mate.

18 minutes ago, Codaxx said:

Martindale struggled early in the season. Michigan fans said “3rd and Wink”. He did adjust and lot of that was pairing down the playbook, especially the complex blitzes 

What did he pair it with?

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15 minutes ago, Post Oak said:

 

That fucking thing right there, in whose shadow nothing good nor godly will ever fucking grow. He is of mixed religion, therefore he is godless. He was adopted by Satan himself before he was returned out of fear of his awkwardness. But he's impossible to marry off due to his lethal dimensions. His mother, terrified, she's fucking abandoned him. And there he is, stood before you like the first of some brand-new fucking species! Any man that you put before him, right, it'd be like entering a fucking threshing machine, mate.

wtf GIF

26 minutes ago, Post Oak said:

 

That fucking thing right there, in whose shadow nothing good nor godly will ever fucking grow. He is of mixed religion, therefore he is godless. He was adopted by Satan himself before he was returned out of fear of his awkwardness. But he's impossible to marry off due to his lethal dimensions. His mother, terrified, she's fucking abandoned him. And there he is, stood before you like the first of some brand-new fucking species! Any man that you put before him, right, it'd be like entering a fucking threshing machine, mate.

the simpsons grandpa simpson GIF

46 minutes ago, Post Oak said:

 

That fucking thing right there, in whose shadow nothing good nor godly will ever fucking grow. He is of mixed religion, therefore he is godless. He was adopted by Satan himself before he was returned out of fear of his awkwardness. But he's impossible to marry off due to his lethal dimensions. His mother, terrified, she's fucking abandoned him. And there he is, stood before you like the first of some brand-new fucking species! Any man that you put before him, right, it'd be like entering a fucking threshing machine, mate.

Is this Carnac Mccarthy?

16 minutes ago, mwaadeeb said:

Is this Carnac Mccarthy?

 

35 minutes ago, BigHornedLurker said:

the simpsons grandpa simpson GIF

 

47 minutes ago, DFW Horn said:

wtf GIF

 

2 hours ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Imma kick you in the dick 

Well, according to Sydney, you’ll have to punch him in the dick. Or,

image.gif.6599f7ec9425fe177622dd411da4e188.gif

Edited by MuellerHorn

10 hours ago, thrillhammer said:

is there a depth chart out?  i dont see it posted on ut athletics site.

See attached depth chart.

There were quite a few projected depth charts posted by various media orgs with multiple differences between them. My version is unlikely to match an official one if it gets posted, but will have the lion's share of important players on it. For those not on the depth chart, refer to the roster also attached below.

Two names I didn't include on the depth chart (due to space constraints, wanted it to fit a single page) who might see playing time according to Gerry of OTF are:

  • #28 Santana Wilson, DB Fr-RS
  • #15 Justus Terry, DL Fr-HS

I'll also post these in the roster thread and probably in the game thread as well. The roster is 3 pages vs 5 of the official roster I imported the data from.

2025 Texas Football Roster.pdf Texas Depth Chart vs Ohio State Buckeyes - Game 1_2025.pdf

1 hour ago, pyrofiend said:
1 hour ago, Billy Pilgrim said:
I remember people saying this about Martindale at Michigan last year. He had no answer for Sark’s game plan. 

Wink Martindale was brought in specifically for continuity though. The last 3 Michigan DCs have all come from the Baltimore Ravens staff: Mike Macdonald, Jesse Minter, and now Wink Martindale.

We’ve dismissed most of the Michigan comps from last year and rightly so.  But there is one particular similarity that does apply.  Both Michigan and OSU have/had a talented but shallow defensive line combined with new a defensive coordinator.  When you watch the Michigan game it is obvious that the plan was to exhaust the DL starters then pound the ball when the second string came in.  I would be surprised if we don’t see a similar plan on Saturday.  Especially now that Baxter can be part of the pounding.  That means early on we might see more tempo and outside zone schemes to get the OSU DL running from sideline to sideline.  Once they are exhausted we follow with the gap power run game.

 

7 minutes ago, MichaelDicksonFanClub said:

IMG_5366.jpeg

Here is the clip. 

 

Sorry guys that was me. Worst case I offset a bunch of winnings from earlier this year.

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When the surly nurse mafia starts laying money down, the line will move for real.

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