Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

  • Replies 2.4k
  • Views 224.3k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Brisketexan
    Brisketexan

    $80k can buy this truck, but it clearly can’t buy a lick of sense. Seen at the Far West HEB - dumbass tried to completely cut over the curb. Didn’t see the giant-ass boulder, and high-centered on it

  • Longhornstampede
    Longhornstampede

    So I went to the store earlier today. I wound up parking in the space to the left of that small black car After I pulled into the parking space I noticed a piece of paper stuck in the door handle

Posted Images

On 7/26/2025 at 9:03 AM, Bama Llama said:

My mother, a resident of Tuscaloosa, Alabama, departed this life in 1996.  Her home, the same one I was raised in, was a ten-minute walk from Bryant Denny stadium. In those days, game day parking was in demand and yahoos from all over the Deep South parked all over the place on my old street.  Mrs. Llama. Baby Llama and I lived on the Gulf OF MEXICO end of the state.  We would commute on game weekends and stay in the house while estate admin was ongoing.  One day Bama had some kind of punk ass early kick game on Jefferson Pilot.  I went to run an errand about 9:30 only to find some asshole had parked behind me blocking my vehicle inside the driveway.  After considering some of the criminal mischief options above, I settled on removing the asshole’s license plate.  We watched the game on TV (no tix), and expected the asshole might be knocking on the door at some point, at which I planned to play dumb other than to ask him to GTFO my driveway or prepare to be towed, which happened frequently on game days. I went out eventually and found the asshole had gone.  On Sunday, as we drove back to the coast, I sailed his license plate off a tall bridge into the muddy waters of the Alabama River just South of Jackson, Alabama.  I hope the fucker got pulled over, charged wigh DUI, hassled and searched by state troopers every 30 miles wherever he went on his way home. The absolute selfish bullshit!  He had no idea who he was blocking in that day or if someone in the house might need to use their fucking driveway.  Asshole.

calling a tow truck not an option?  they jerk off to shit like that. 

14 hours ago, futureman said:

calling a tow truck not an option?  they jerk off to shit like that. 

Rock throwing suspect Pat Johnson discussing plea deal

19 hours ago, futureman said:

calling a tow truck not an option?  they jerk off to shit like that. 

You are right.  We called repeatedly but all the tow truck companies’ drivers in town were out towing other assholes’ vehicles. The cops were no help cuz the whole vehicle was all the way onto our private property.  They said if he was hanging out into a public street, they would’ve towed it to the impound lot.  If only. I like to think being tagless on the byeays of Alabama, on game day no less when the troopers, deputies and local cops are all out and praying for excuses to make traffic stops, brought him and his companions some unforeseen misery.

Edited by Bama Llama
Spellgin

Since you live in Alabama, you must have at least one friend with a jacked-up little penis compensating pickup that could have hooked a chain to the car and dragged it out into the street.

On 7/26/2025 at 9:59 AM, T-shirt Sip said:

Are those speakers under the truck?

bitchin' huh!! 

5 hours ago, Ghost of NMAS said:

Since you live in Alabama, you must have at least one friend with a jacked-up little penis compensating pickup that could have hooked a chain to the car and dragged it out into the street.

Well, shit.  Where were you and those two gorgeous avararettes when I needed you?

Bee Cave Lowes.  I would really hate for that sh*tbucket (with 3 month expired registration) to get door dinged.

unnamed.thumb.jpg.2594e88c62bc9e590502258d59d73a60.jpg

 

unnamed.thumb.jpg.62ab7ae336619baa92992e1866db8718.jpg

Not that I agree with the parking, but that lot looks totally empty, so I probably would let him live.

Someone posted it above, but Lowes/Home Depot parking lots are like Mad Max playgrounds.  There are no rules.  

3 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Not that I agree with the parking, but that lot looks totally empty, so I probably would let him live.

It was towards the front.  Don't care if it's empty or not, take that shit to the back of the lot.  it was the third and fourth spots in the aisle, not the back half.

4 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Not that I agree with the parking, but that lot looks totally empty, so I probably would let him live.

No, it encourages bad behavior.

17 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Surly encourages bad behavior.

Surly encourages retribution and comeuppance.  Usually with limited self awareness, but still….

IMG_0806.thumb.jpeg.a637139249415336ab4546c2394bf5ac.jpeg
 

Visiting my parents in Spring. Semi busy parking lot with a busy restaurant at the right end of the shopping complex plus 3 or 4 other businesses that are open. Left spot says compact only

  • 2 weeks later...

HEB is like shooting fish in a barrel 

 

PXL_20250816_230308338_MP.thumb.jpg.95e605f2f736f0c021b5ce647ff41b4e.jpg

PXL_20250816_230317100_MP.thumb.jpg.0baac41a362c6348050043633167d4f8.jpg

PXL_20250816_230323795_MP.thumb.jpg.e6c2f73bae322df2ab22e46c53b32957.jpg

PXL_20250816_230327230_MP.thumb.jpg.665e4469569ee17e908418d6df80e093.jpg

PXL_20250817_154140236_MP.thumb.jpg.18379ed14a9a61c86b0a0813adfdeb70.jpg

PXL_20250817_154201314_MP.thumb.jpg.5a918f3a882adeb3f3e97e88fb669ca6.jpg

Bonus delorean

PXL_20250817_154237029_MP.thumb.jpg.a0625cfd59117c15355ba2e2eb23161b.jpg

Finally got the chance to use one of these last week....at HEB.

On 4/18/2024 at 2:40 PM, Mittens said:

Fuck. Yes.

image.thumb.jpeg.2825413516dc8cc9d42bd10c80e0ce26.jpeg

18 hours ago, Mittens said:

Finally got the chance to use one of these last week....at HEB.

Target rich environment.  It's like trying to find a single mom at a strip club.

100%.  Arguably could drop one off on any given visit, but this was particularly egregious -  busy time of day, close to entrance, tire fully over the line  making the adjacent slot completely unusable.

Went out for lunch today to see these 2 yahoos parked next to me.

 

IMG_1176.jpeg

IMG_1177.jpeg

IMG_1178.jpeg

On 8/21/2025 at 2:11 PM, Ghost of NMAS said:

Well what do you expect from someone who reverses in

you gotta stop beating this dead horse.  I’m sorry you can’t reverse into a spot, I really am.  I’m sure if you asked your boyfriend to teach you he would. 

8 hours ago, futureman said:

posting here as this thread is not far removed from road rage. 

If one deploys the LED middle finger, road rage will be induced. 

I would laugh if I saw it though.

Mine would say, "Sorry I let her drive..."

Sweatergawd downtown Houston has the worst parallel parkers on the planet

Typical block

PXL_20250826_234106101_MP.thumb.jpg.2c15a33a1706d1fa1bbcc8a7490ae366.jpg

Can you confirm there wasn't a HD truck parked where the audi or black car was before the white jeep parked?  Are there markings on the road?  

My only criteria for judgement on parallel parking jobs: are they within 12" of the curb (I know 18" is the law, but come on...), is there enough space in front of and behind them for all  vehicles to be able to get out, and if they're on the front or back of a parking line, are they pulled as far up / back as the spot allows for?  

Not sure what the issue there would be to begin with.  It's a space for 4 vehicles, and there are 4 vehicles in the space.

Once had a smart car back up against the bumper of my Z71 while leaving a car length in front of that POS. I put my beast into 4wl and pushed that joke of car onto the curb. 

Miss that truck.

29 minutes ago, MissingInAction said:

smart car

those things are like little walnuts. 

1 hour ago, futureman said:

those things are like little walnuts. 

They are a great option in European cities with tiny medieval streets. They are suicidal in most of the U.S. If you are in one of those and get hit by even a mid-sized sedan at highway speed, sayonara. 

3 hours ago, Mittens said:

Not sure what the issue there would be to begin with.  It's a space for 4 vehicles, and there are 4 vehicles in the space.

Definitely room for 5 if people didn't feel the need to leave 4+ feet front and back. I've watched people pull into a space large enough for 2 normal size SUVs and then center themselves rather than pulling up or back in the space. So, no, while I can't confirm an F350 crew cab with extended bed just left, it seems unlikely with the number of blocks I see just like this. And downtown Houston parallel parking doesn't typically have marked spaces. 

There are literally 4 spots there. Just because 5 small cars could park there doesn’t mean they have to.

23 hours ago, elfenix said:

Sweatergawd downtown Houston has the worst parallel parkers on the planet

Typical block

PXL_20250826_234106101_MP.thumb.jpg.2c15a33a1706d1fa1bbcc8a7490ae366.jpg

This gives me chills.

2 hours ago, Mittens said:

There are literally 4 spots there. Just because 5 small cars could park there doesn’t mean they have to.

Another Grand Cherokee or Q5 could fit if everyone parked tighter. Quit trying to justify people's shit ass parallel parking. 

  • 2 weeks later...

Some commercials are so memorable people will never forget them

or some dainty lace frilled and bedazzled koozies

Edited by RPM

5 hours ago, Steel Shank said:

Many ways to being a parking douche baggery guy.

2d61c2ff92154193c708f2fd428f52de.jpg

 

No surprises here

NS5kht7.gif.eee33ecc3f8bdaebab0ac7c334848c3e.gif

On 9/5/2025 at 2:34 PM, PvilleStang said:

image.png.7e1689aa1155ef57664d2ea166469bd8.png

 

say no more.

Whats wrong with a Tundra?  Good looking trucks.  Are they typically jerk drivers?  No idea. 

5 hours ago, markstanco said:

Whats wrong with a Tundra?  Good looking trucks.  Are they typically jerk drivers?  No idea. 

They are all fine individuals. Some of them (case in point) enjoy copious amounts of Bud Light Lime. That's all.

No need to get upset. Some of my best friends are Tundras.

  • 2 weeks later...

I’m not sure douche bag adequately described this guy. He just got out of his truck and went inside. And he’s not the first person I’ve seen do this. 

IMG_0459.jpeg

IMG_0457.jpeg

8 hours ago, Crapinon said:

I’m not sure douche bag adequately described this guy. He just got out of his truck and went inside. And he’s not the first person I’ve seen do this. 

IMG_0459.jpeg

IMG_0457.jpeg

I think that he no longer needs his needle valves in his stems.  A good Samaritan would remove them for him.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.