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I really want the 10 minutes back I spent on this thread.  No worthwhile pics, no juicy felonies...nothing!  Just a bunch of heavy stroking about "how do I trust people?"

Hide under the covers, Dorothy, it's a mean world out there.  

Ah well...at least it was more entertaining that dishwasher switch placements in the Stupid Wives thread.  I can't dance to it, but I'll give it a "6"......

Would a person who leaves their wallet in a grocery cart be reliable when telling someone else how much money was om the wallet? Something smells fishy.

So either the wallet was found by professional thieves in a one in a million coincidence, or law abiding people found it and decided to use their find to turn to a life of crime and rob this house?

I'm going with C. Massive miscommunication.

9 hours ago, mulletpelini said:

See, this is the shit they don't tell you about before you get married.  You're fucking going to take that loss, over, and over, and fucking over again.  Keys phone wallet, keys phone wallet.  Just the most fucking important inanimate things in EVERY FUCKING PERSONS LIFE.

My lady and I started living together over 12 years ago and she loves to cook (win).  Cooking makes opening and closing the fridge a requirement, which she was really fucking terrible at.  So I was an asshole and put a fucking sign on the fridge that said close the fucking door, everytime.  I caught hell, called an asshole, you know the story.  But you know what, that fucking fridge has never been ajar one fucking day since, and she absolutely makes sure every fucking time.  Sometimes you gotta lose the little battles to win the fucking war.

That's my message to the youth.  Looking at you millennials.

I’m sorry that you can’t afford a fridge with a door alarm.

2 hours ago, PilotsError said:

So either the wallet was found by professional thieves in a one in a million coincidence, or law abiding people found it and decided to use their find to turn to a life of crime and rob this house?

I'm going with C. Massive miscommunication.

My thoughts completely.

Occam's Razor -   Someone's goofy wife (see wife thread for anecdotal evidence) found a wallet, tried to give it back - hilarity ensued.

 

Just now, LonghornJones said:

WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GIFT CARDS??

ISIS has them.

10 hours ago, Hook1997 said:

If they had to authorities could track her down pretty easy from all the info on Facebook. 

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha.  Unless she murdered someone, the authorities won't do shit.  You could give them her name, address, and a DNA sample and they would tell you there's nothing they can do. 

Well this thread was disappointing.

7 hours ago, SquishMitten said:

This thread, man. Some of y’all need to be less scared of the world.

Tell that to my missing kidney.

On 10/28/2018 at 9:16 PM, CooterBrown said:

That chick is in Brazil. You may wanna ask your wife what the fuck she’s up to.

Katy is a suburb of Sao Paulo, amirite?

1 hour ago, ImissWallyPryor said:

Katy is a suburb of Sao Paulo, amirite?

She.has been called a lot of things. Mostly whale cunt.

15 hours ago, AM Wood said:

I’m sorry that you can’t afford a fridge with a door alarm.

millennial coddler.

Tell that to my missing kidney.


I did. Now he’s living a great life on a farm up north.
On 10/28/2018 at 9:42 PM, woohorn said:

If you find a wallet in a grocery store cart/p-lot, you return it to customer service unless store is closed (HEB).

Scam.

This.

I found an Ipad in a cart last week.  Looked around for anyone walking back to their vehicle...no one.

Took it to customer service and left it.  Hopefully the person didn't have cardiac arrest when they realized they were 15 minutes without their ipad.

5 hours ago, slorch said:

This.

I found an Ipad in a cart last week.  Looked around for anyone walking back to their vehicle...no one.

Took it to customer service and left it.  Hopefully the person didn't have cardiac arrest when they realized they were 15 minutes without their ipad.

That iPad, like the One Ring, was done with its previous "owner". It used you to move on.

6 hours ago, slorch said:

I found an Ipad in a cart last week.  Looked around for anyone walking back to their vehicle...no one.

So it went better for you than last time.

Ballot+Box+Bunny+Sam+attacked+by+women.j

Pos rep for using Yosemite Sam!!!

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