December 25, 20186 yr 2 minutes ago, Gil Bang said: Did he die, or just retire from jacking it? He died. The cumulative weight of a lifetime of drinking a shitload of Busch Light did him in
December 25, 20186 yr Author He died. The cumulative weight of a lifetime of drinking a shitload of Busch Light did him in That sounds like the worst slow suicide imaginable.
December 25, 20186 yr 3 minutes ago, Royalfan5 said: He died. The cumulative weight of a lifetime of drinking a shitload of Busch Light did him in Did anybody else just check themselves for a pulse after reading this?
December 25, 20186 yr 2 minutes ago, GhostOfTomJoad said: 4 minutes ago, Royalfan5 said: He died. The cumulative weight of a lifetime of drinking a shitload of Busch Light did him in That sounds like the worst slow suicide imaginable. And you never met his long time live in girlfriend
December 25, 20186 yr 10 minutes ago, Royalfan5 said: He died. The cumulative weight of a lifetime of drinking a shitload of Busch Light did him in WTF? "Light" beer is healthy beer, no?
December 25, 20186 yr You’re a weird fucker.Duh. So brisket and prime rib for Christmas is weird? Merry Christmas Mr. Vegan.As for the coffee that was to troll the only baileys bla bla bla in the coffee wankers.
December 25, 20186 yr Lent my sister and BiL my burner and pot last year to fry a turkey, because I was in Virginia. We're all having Christmas at her house this year. We want fried turkey but her HOA has since forbidden the practice, so she asked me if I'd fry a couple and bring them over. So, all week I asked her "you're sure you still have all the components for the fryer because I won't pick it up until Christmas morning" Yes, she assured me. So I go over there this morning to open gifts and get the fryer to bring back to my house. Aaaaand, no thermometer. Nothing's open and I'm not sure how the fuck I'm supposed to fry two turkeys w/out having any clue to oil temp. Merry fuckin' Christmashttps://www.thermoworks.com ho ho ho
December 25, 20186 yr We just did a drawing to distribute my late Uncles Adult DVD collection. I drew South Padre Sluts 47 Seen it.. youll like it
December 25, 20186 yr On 12/21/2018 at 11:37 AM, GhostOfTomJoad said: Not trying to put this in CR territory, just clarifying some shit. * moved to TX at 14 (dad's job). Love it here. Grew up in 'burbs east of St Paul (Woodbury area) * wife always knew her dad to be racist, but it was the polite vs overt when she was young. She spent her teen years trying to change his views to no avail * the führer sign was made for him by a friend. From his church. He's not the only one with one. His fellow prepper friends also display them proudly (they think it's knee slapping funny) Highlight of the trip was dinner last night. We brought fillets that I grilled. FIL was wondering why he had a butter knife instead of a steak knife. MIL said "they're so tender you'll barely need a knife." He proved her right, because he was so drunk he was cutting his fillet with the top side of the butter knife. Back home already. Less than 24 hours door to door. Now the fun can begin. Best of luck to the rest of ya surly bastards. Did you explain to him that the führer shot himself in the head in his bunker? Maybe encourage him to do the same.
December 25, 20186 yr Author I really should try to find a way to have a surly happy hour at the inlaws' ranch.
December 25, 20186 yr 3 minutes ago, GhostOfTomJoad said: I really should try to find a way to have a surly happy hour at the inlaws' ranch. Yes. Yes you should
December 25, 20186 yr 6 minutes ago, GhostOfTomJoad said: I really should try to find a way to have a surly happy hour at the inlaws' ranch. I hope they have good insurance. Edited December 25, 20186 yr by Telegraph_it
December 25, 20186 yr 5 minutes ago, Anastasis said: I don’t give a fuck what y’all say phlegm is l.i.v.i.n. it's spelled i.n.s.a.n.e.
December 25, 20186 yr what model thermometer is that green thing? Is it any good? My maverick took a shit.
December 25, 20186 yr what model thermometer is that green thing? Is it any good? My maverick took a shit. That’s the asparagus.
December 25, 20186 yr Somewhere phlegms family is posting in a similar thread about the meat being too dry
December 25, 20186 yr Everyone in the family, except for my daughter and I, was outside. She’s laying on top of me on the sofa. I’m scratching her back, which she loves, and enjoying a moment alone with her. My MIL walks in the house, sits on my feet/legs, picks up her phone to get on Facebook and never says a word. There is a second sofa and two empty chairs in the room. I should have thrown a cup of microwaved coffee in her face.
December 25, 20186 yr 2 hours ago, Royalfan5 said: We just did a drawing to distribute my late Uncles Adult DVD collection. I drew South Padre Sluts 47 I might be in that. Let me know how I was
December 25, 20186 yr what model thermometer is that green thing? Is it any good? My maverick took a shit. Thats a smoke from thermoworks.Sign up for their emails and wait for the sales. They have a brand new model of those that hook to wifi.www.thermoworks.comShaggy turned me on to these guys. Thanks shaggysurly you guys fuck.
December 25, 20186 yr Oh and I cooked on a masterbuilt 40" electric smoker. Oak and mesquite chips. 250 for about 4 hours for the prime rib and 8 hours at 250 for the brisket. First brisket on the thing. No smoke ring but it tasted good. And the prime rib was awesome. It's a stopgap until I can build a real pit. Fucking broken ankle fucked up this whole year on shit like this. Incision didnt heal so I had a wound vac on my ankle for three months. Merry Christmas OU sucks ho ho ho
December 26, 20186 yr Rumor around my buddy’s hood is this was a turkey fry gone wrong this morning. I hope this wasn’t the guy without the thermometer.
December 26, 20186 yr 2 minutes ago, Goofyboy said: Rumor around my buddy’s hood is this was a turkey fry gone wrong this morning. I hope this wasn’t the guy without the thermometer. Where the fuck were they frying, the living room???
December 26, 20186 yr Freshman year at Texas, called my parents to tell them our team had just lost the intramural championship flag football game. They answered to tell me my mother had attempted to burn the house down. She was making fried jalapeños, realized they didn’t have Ranch, ran to the store to get some. Didn’t turn the stove off. Pops fortunately got home first before everything was fucked. That pic above really sucks though.
December 26, 20186 yr Listening to my dad and uncle talk about how Aledo recruits their players for high school football. Its fairly interesting
December 26, 20186 yr Just now, Mac8111 said: “Show up at 3pm and we will eat at 3:30”. Who the fuck wants to eat at 3:30? They just want you gone by 7
December 26, 20186 yr 3 hours ago, GhostOfTomJoad said: I really should try to find a way to have a surly happy hour at the inlaws' ranch. I'd come. I'm probably more insufferable than your FIL anyway. Edited December 26, 20186 yr by ztejas Not nearly as racist
December 26, 20186 yr Finishing up the holidays with a few classic arcade games before giving my kidneys and liver a breather this weekend.
December 26, 20186 yr Thats a smoke from thermoworks.Sign up for their emails and wait for the sales. They have a brand new model of those that hook to wifi.www.thermoworks.comShaggy turned me on to these guys. Thanks shaggysurly you guys fuck.Thermoworks is the shit. Love them.
December 26, 20186 yr 3 hours ago, Mac8111 said: “Show up at 3pm and we will eat at 3:30”. Who the fuck wants to eat at 3:30? That beats the fuck out of : Get here at 11:00 ish, expecting to eat at noon, and the meal is ready at 4.
December 26, 20186 yr I can't bitch about this. LHN knows what they're doing. Educating my younger siblings on the miracle that was.
December 26, 20186 yr 15 hours ago, luke duke said: Everyone in the family, except for my daughter and I, was outside. She’s laying on top of me on the sofa. I’m scratching her back, which she loves, and enjoying a moment alone with her. My MIL walks in the house, sits on my feet/legs, picks up her phone to get on Facebook and never says a word. There is a second sofa and two empty chairs in the room. I should have thrown a cup of microwaved coffee in her face. passive aggressive disapproval of the lying down touching? Only thing I can think of. That isn't on you and your daughter, that was innocent and moments that make Christmas great.
December 26, 20186 yr On 12/24/2018 at 2:07 PM, slorch said: On the way home from work, drove by Specs at I-45 and Rayford. Parking lot was overflowing. I thought of this thread immediately. Poor bastards. also, and maybe this is for the beer thread; but do people drink everything they buy every day? Why the fucking last minute shopping for stuff that's got a great shelflife? Christmas gifts.
December 26, 20186 yr 17 minutes ago, burntorangebongos said: passive aggressive disapproval of the lying down touching? Only thing I can think of. That isn't on you and your daughter, that was innocent and moments that make Christmas great. Nah, MIL is signaling that she wants to be the one lying on top of him.
December 26, 20186 yr Just now, SHOOTER12 said: Nah, MIL is signaling that she wants to be the one lying on top of him. We'll need pics of the MIL to continue with this fantasy.... errr discussion.
December 26, 20186 yr 1 minute ago, Onboard 2.0 said: We'll need pics of the MIL to continue with this fantasy.... errr discussion. So...you can fap to that?
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