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Surly Horns

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Featured Replies

60% of the time, it works every time.

I know what you're asking yourself and the answer is yes. I have a nick name for my penis. Its called the Octagon, but I also nick named my testes - my left one is James Westfall and my right one is Dr. Kenneth Nosewater. You ladies play your cards right you just might get to meet the whole gang.

Well that's just great; bears. You hear that Ed? Now you're putting the whole station in jeopardy.

Brian, I'm going to be honest with you. That smells like pure gasoline...

I will smash your face into a car windshield then take your mother, Dorothy Mantooth, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again.

I was in love once.
What was her name?
I don’t remember.
That’s not a good start, but keep going.

I'll give this little cookie an hour before we're doing the no-pants dance. Time to musk up.

I will smash your face into a car windshield, and then take your mother, Dorothy Mantooth, out for a nice seafood dinner and never call her again. 
 

Champ Kind: We need you. Hell, I need you. I'm a mess without you. I miss you so damn much! I miss being with you. I miss being *near* you. I miss your laugh!

Champ Kind: I miss your scent.

Champ Kind: I miss your musk... When this all gets sorted out, I think you and me should get an apartment together!

Brian Fantana: Take it easy, Champ. Why don't you sit this next one out, stop talking for a while.

  • Author

I'm kind of a big deal. People know me.
 

Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course means: A whale's vagina.

 we've both seen our share of pornographic materials. Oh, you never have? Of course you haven't, how stupid of me. Neither have I. I was just speaking in generalities. Right. I'll stop by the school a little later, Sister Margaret

I’m a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal, and brawn.

Como éstan, bitches! Spanish language news is here. Tonight's top story: the sewers run red with Burgundy's blood.

Why don't you go back to your home on whore island?

I woke up on the floor of some Japanese family's rec room, and they would not stop screaming.

Edited by Jimbaround

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