Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

56 minutes ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

I'm looking at Tucker's outfit, the messy prep school/fratboy look with the wrinkled shirt needs to go away. On second thought, maybe Tucker needs to take another sabbatical.

He started out back in the day wearing bow ties.

He's that guy.

  • Replies 3.5k
  • Views 284.7k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

Posted Images

2 minutes ago, David Dennison said:

He started out back in the day wearing bow ties.

He's that guy.

I knew he dropped the bow ties, but I'm still amazed that more people don't see through his schtick.

1 minute ago, longhornmatt said:

At what point are they going to have to spice up the border caravan story that they've been using since like 2010?   That's seemingly the only play left in their playbook, and eventually it's going to become old hat even to their most committed outrage porn viewers.   

What's the next step?   Is the next iteration of the caravan going to have Latin Americans AND gypsies?   Reports of the migrants using Sharia Law?  Tucker might need to put on this thinking cap.

When a portion of the viewers believe in Jewish Space Lasers causing forest fires, the sky is the limit!

1 hour ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

When a portion of the viewers believe in Jewish Space Lasers causing forest fires, the sky is the limit!

Just need to mass produce fire resistant shields, and if you act now, you can get not one, but two--two protective shields for the price of one for the amazing low price of $99.99.  These are the same flame resistant shield products that Spaceforce uses in their intergalactic battles.**  These shields also repel meteorites, solar flares and high winds.  But wait, that's not all. Order now and you'll also get this foldable shammy to polish your shield so that when the sky is falling, your shield will shine.    Mdhorn accepts cash, credit cards, PayPal, and Venmo. 

**(Jewish Space Lasers are not within Spaceforce's jurisdiction and Spaceforce is non-discriminatory against Jews enlisted or enlisting)

Edited by Mdhorn

  • Author
3 hours ago, The Ace of Aces said:

The official Army Twitter feed has trolled him all day. You know you are a piece of human trash when that happens. 

Holy shit, they really are trolling the fuck out of him.   Going hard in the paint.  

3 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

eventually it's going to become old hat even to their most committed outrage porn viewers. 

Dude, you can still get most of their viewers wound up by offhandedly mentioning Gennifer Flowers. There's no such thing as oversaturation to these people. They'll always come back for more.

3 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

At what point are they going to have to spice up the border caravan story that they've been using since like 2010?   That's seemingly the only play left in their playbook, and eventually it's going to become old hat even to their most committed outrage porn viewers.   

What's the next step?   Is the next iteration of the caravan going to have Latin Americans AND gypsies?   Reports of the migrants using Sharia Law?  Tucker might need to put on this thinking cap.

I thought this one already came up during one of the caravans.

27 minutes ago, aggie08 said:

Dude, you can still get most of their viewers wound up by offhandedly mentioning Gennifer Flowers. There's no such thing as oversaturation to these people. They'll always come back for more.

If you ever run into one of those people, remind them of the joke that Johnny Carson told on the Tonight Show on Jan. 12, 1992. It was well before Clinton won the nomination when the Gennifer Flowers story was out. It was also while Donald Trump was still married to Ivana, his first wife. The joke was that Gennifer Flowers had lost her job but it was okay because she’d already lined up a new job as Donald Trump’s backup mistress, “in case Marla Maples was unable to fulfill her duties.”

2 hours ago, Mole said:

I thought this one already came up during one of the caravans.

Close: it was discarded Korans littering the Sonoran desert. We were promised shootouts with ISIS in the streets of Laredo....

1 hour ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

We were promised shootouts with ISIS in the streets of Laredo....

Would have beat the hell out of McMurtry’s book

4 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Close: it was discarded Korans littering the Sonoran desert. We were promised shootouts with ISIS in the streets of Laredo....

And mooslim prayer blankets.

7 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

Yeah, but that just invites them to list off Donald Trump’s most clever jokes, including classics like “Nuh uh, you’re the puppet”, “blood coming from her ... wherever”, “injecting cleanser”, “shithole countries”, and of course, “covfefe.”   

Man, I don't miss that shit at all.

I'm starting the countdown to Tucker's "unscheduled" vacation until this drops out of the headlines.  You done fucked up when the Army starts trolling you on Twitter.

Edited by kevwun

5 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

 

 

 

He’s right you know. We are the ones allowing this shit to go on by watching Drama TV. Or reacting to it, spreading it, whatever. Same with Trump and his drama politics. (Now that’s he’s out of office) the best thing is to ignore them. Attention is the only thing giving them life, attention equals money. 

 Fox's lawyers: The 'general tenor' of the show should then inform a viewer that Carlson is not 'stating actual facts' about the topics he discusses and is instead engaging in 'exaggeration' and 'non-literal commentary.  According to Fox's lawyers, you shouldn't believe the "facts" that Tucker Carlson tells you.  Per Judge Mary Kay Vyskocil, an appointee of President Trump:  "Whether the Court frames Mr. Carlson's statements as 'exaggeration,' 'non-literal commentary,' or simply bloviating for his audience, the conclusion remains the same — the statements are not actionable."


https://www.npr.org/2020/09/29/917747123/you-literally-cant-believe-the-facts-tucker-carlson-tells-you-so-say-fox-s-lawye
 

Edited by Horn Under a Bad Sign

  • Author
9 hours ago, aggie08 said:

Dude, you can still get most of their viewers wound up by offhandedly mentioning Gennifer Flowers. 

For quite a few years, you could get me wound up by mentioning Gennifer Flowers.

For different reasons than your typical FNC viewer, but still.

If I were Bill, I would have bailed on Hillary for Gennifer Flowers, even if it meant risking a suicide at a national park.

Jennifer with a G is like Robert with a W.

  • Popular Post
5 minutes ago, Mole said:

Jennifer with a G is like Robert with a W.

Dwead Piwate Woberts is here for you soulllllllllll.

1 hour ago, Neonmoon said:

He’s right you know. We are the ones allowing this shit to go on by watching Drama TV. Or reacting to it, spreading it, whatever. Same with Trump and his drama politics. (Now that’s he’s out of office) the best thing is to ignore them. Attention is the only thing giving them life, attention equals money. 

I'd much rather see someone slit his throat on live tv.  Now that's some drama.  

On 1/25/2021 at 8:23 PM, Mrs Whiggins said:

Agree. He is paid to sell this entertainment and he does. He does no soul searching, has no regret. Since joining Fox, he never has to get his hands dirty and leave the studio to report from Haifa like he did in his early MSNBC career or ride the 'L' in Chicago to get to work. Had he been accepted into the CIA program when he applied, we might never have known him. The rich and well connected son who knows his audience very very well and every night gives them a performance to discuss in the morning.

Shameless is the word.

It occurs to me that the TV series, Shameless, focuses on the low rent part of the spectrum (at least as far as watching one episode indicates). That's petty shamelessness. For grand shamelessness, you must look in more elevated places where the demagogues and greedy gather.

14 hours ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

He was repeating some of Abbott's word salad that went out nationwide and since he knew we're in Texas seemed to think we were awaiting the Viking plague with the doors barred. I feigned innocence and said pretty firmly that everyone in Texas knows Abbott is a politician and that he's trying to keep his job due to the energy fiasco and that BP is testing any asylum seekers and sending any positives to separate facilities so that neither Texas/USA or Mexico are faced with more outbreaks than they are already handling. He seemed to accept the political angle--most people seemed to understand that type of lingo. but maybe he was humoring me and not the other way around. I didn't dwell on it, not much point and if we're to continue doing business, then I need to get that part done.

Back in the 80s, I took a temp job at UT working a phone poll. A show about the Soviets conquering America was on TV. The poll was about defense spending and some other things. I wasn't to guide the respondents in any way.

I was polling a guy (yeah yeah) in Colorado about defense. Very conservative Reaganite. 

We've got to do something about those communists down in Nicaragua. You say you're calling from Texas?

Yessir

You know better than I do about this. They could come up through Texas. You're worried about that, aren't you?

(I couldn't keep from cracking up.) No sir, I don't know anybody worrying about the Nicaraguans.

He was surprised and skeptical.

  • Popular Post

I've been shitting cinder blocks everyday since I was 7-years-old about Communist narco revolutionaries crossing the border and coming to my house and tossing regular garbage in my recycling bin. Just because nothing has happened doesn't mean something shouldn't be done about it. 

16 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

Back in the 80s, I took a temp job at UT working a phone poll. A show about the Soviets conquering America was on TV. The poll was about defense spending and some other things. I wasn't to guide the respondents in any way.

I was polling a guy (yeah yeah) in Colorado about defense. Very conservative Reaganite. 

We've got to do something about those communists down in Nicaragua. You say you're calling from Texas?

Yessir

You know better than I do about this. They could come up through Texas. You're worried about that, aren't you?

(I couldn't keep from cracking up.) No sir, I don't know anybody worrying about the Nicaraguans.

He was surprised and skeptical.

My favorite cigars are Nicaraguans. 

15 hours ago, burntorangebongos said:

BABY ARM!!!!!

Oh, calm down.  You look WAY too happy. 💣

F969_AB74-_D9_B6-4_D1_D-_A044-81_F72_F7_

23 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

Back in the 80s, I took a temp job at UT working a phone poll. A show about the Soviets conquering America was on TV. The poll was about defense spending and some other things. I wasn't to guide the respondents in any way.

I was polling a guy (yeah yeah) in Colorado about defense. Very conservative Reaganite. 

We've got to do something about those communists down in Nicaragua. You say you're calling from Texas?

Yessir

You know better than I do about this. They could come up through Texas. You're worried about that, aren't you?

(I couldn't keep from cracking up.) No sir, I don't know anybody worrying about the Nicaraguans.

He was surprised and skeptical.

I'm old enough to remember that speech Ronnie gave talking about the dangers of the Sandinistas by him pointing out that Brownsville was closer to Nicaragua than DC. 

Edited by bolverk

46 minutes ago, bolverk said:

I'm old enough to remember that speech Ronnie gave talking about the dangers of the Sandinistas by him pointing out that Brownsville was closer to Nicaragua than DC. 

It was actually Harlingen, but yes, they tried very hard to scare the shit out of every single breathing American about a country that basically had 2 elevators and a fucking escalator "following the script of Mein Kampf." There are still Americans to this day that fall for that horeshit hook, line and sinker, and I haven't the slightest atom of sympathy to afford to them.

Edited by hpslugga

1 hour ago, bolverk said:

I'm old enough to remember that speech Ronnie gave talking about the dangers of the Sandinistas by him pointing out that Brownsville was closer to Nicaragua than DC. 

I remember thinking of all the deer hunters waiting for them with scoped, high powered rifles. Texas would be a sniper nightmare for a poorly equipped invader.

26 minutes ago, hpslugga said:

It was actually Harlingen, but yes, they tried very hard to scare the shit out of every single breathing American about a country that basically had 2 elevators and a fucking escalator "following the script of Mein Kampf." There are still Americans to this day that fall for that horeshit hook, line and sinker, and I haven't the slightest atom of sympathy to afford to them.

Just look at ISIS more recently.  We were told they were an existential threat to the country and it was about 20K people in Toyota pickups.

i'm robert smith.  i'm 68 years old, retired, and live in tampa.  i eat meat and potatoes every day.  and the biggest threat to my freedom is isis.

18 hours ago, Mrs Whiggins said:

I was on a business call yesterday and although I was hoping it wouldn't go there, the topic was brought up by the caller, whom I know to be a hard R supporter. I set the record straight firmly and changed the subject. I really hate the Fox outrage machine, it peddles so much disinfo.

https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hard R

21 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

At what point are they going to have to spice up the border caravan story that they've been using since like 2010?   That's seemingly the only play left in their playbook, and eventually it's going to become old hat even to their most committed outrage porn viewers.   

What's the next step?   Is the next iteration of the caravan going to have Latin Americans AND gypsies?   Reports of the migrants using Sharia Law?  Tucker might need to put on this thinking cap.

brad pitt dogs GIF

Did someone mention gypsy caravans?

I prefer periwinkle blue.

23 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

brad pitt dogs GIF

Did someone mention gypsy caravans?

I prefer periwinkle blue.

Wha da ah wan wid a caravan that got no fookin wheels?

John Oliver's main segment tonight was on Tucker. 

that's gonna leave a mark.

I know a female Marine who could knock the bowtie off of that Charmin soft little boy.

2 hours ago, mchookem said:

John Oliver's main segment tonight was on Tucker. 

that's gonna leave a mark.

That was a great piece. Unfortunately, none of Tucker Carlson’s audience will ever see it. 

2 hours ago, mchookem said:

John Oliver's main segment tonight was on Tucker. 

that's gonna leave a mark.

He eviscerated Tucker. Bravo, Sir!

On 3/12/2021 at 7:09 PM, hpslugga said:

It was actually Harlingen, but yes, they tried very hard to scare the shit out of every single breathing American about a country that basically had 2 elevators and a fucking escalator "following the script of Mein Kampf." There are still Americans to this day that fall for that horeshit hook, line and sinker, and I haven't the slightest atom of sympathy to afford to them.

Plus rep for remembering it was Harlingen. That and the Robert Earl Keene Christmas song, two big moments in the sun.

2 hours ago, Napoleon said:

B5E1C3AC-1A5A-44C0-A886-BC5230AA6852.jpeg

I've really been amazed at how seamlessly the GOP shifted from the party of strong, quiet, men to the party of obnoxious twerps.  

12 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

That was a great piece. Unfortunately, none of Tucker Carlson’s audience will ever see it. 

So Oliver's specialty is the follow up when someone takes the bait.  And I do not think Tucker is going to ignore this.  I agree Tucker's audience isn't going to be swayed, but Oliver is just going to dig in at the white supremacy angle.  Tucker sent an army of incels to harass Taylor Lorenz.  Oliver has his own internet army.  This could get fun.   

13 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

 

Everyone should re-post this on whatever social media you engage in, particularly if you have "Well, I'M not a white supremacist" conservatives in your social media circle. 

3 hours ago, A-Tex Devil said:

So Oliver's specialty is the follow up when someone takes the bait.  And I do not think Tucker is going to ignore this.  I agree Tucker's audience isn't going to be swayed, but Oliver is just going to dig in at the white supremacy angle.  Tucker sent an army of incels to harass Taylor Lorenz.  Oliver has his own internet army.  This could get fun.   

Eat shit, Bob!

On 3/11/2021 at 5:01 PM, Stringer said:

John Oliver has been on Tucker's case a lot lately.  His wife is a vet, so I imagine he may have a few things to say this weekend.

Season 4 Success GIF by The Office

7 hours ago, A-Tex Devil said:

So Oliver's specialty is the follow up when someone takes the bait.  And I do not think Tucker is going to ignore this.  I agree Tucker's audience isn't going to be swayed, but Oliver is just going to dig in at the white supremacy angle.  Tucker sent an army of incels to harass Taylor Lorenz.  Oliver has his own internet army.  This could get fun.   

Tucker's audience is in a perpetual game of Twister:

Tucker: Biden doesn't support the troops; he wants perpetual war.

Audience: Support the troops! Support Michael Flynn!

Tucker: The military is going to allow transgender persons. What will happen in the tanks?

Audience: Support the troops except those transgender people!

Tucker: Biden unveils military maternity wear; how shocking! What are they doing in the tanks? Pregnant soldiers fighting wars?!

Audience: Support the troops except those women!

Tucker: Biden's military wants to cancel me because I talked smack about female soldiers.

Audience: Forget the troops! All lives matter!

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.