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2019 Texas Football Season - "#8 Go Fuck Yourself Bitch"

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1 hour ago, texifornia said:

Some jackass stole all of BJ Foster's stuff

 

Bet it was Dinesh Patel.

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  • Junior Miller
    Junior Miller

    Brilliant. Sign letter of intent and transfer to Texas with zero intention of ever playing a game. Sit out year. Transfer back to USC. Sit out year. Play one bad ass season and go pro with almost zero

  • Junior Miller
    Junior Miller

    1996 and 2007 we're much different times than Jan 20, 2017 to today.  The gulf in culture is far more pronounced and cultural battle lines much more clear today.  All of you sensitive rednecks ca

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1 minute ago, irishtexan said:

Bet it was Dinesh Patel.

Nah, it was definitely Chip Brown

22 minutes ago, Nope said:

Nah, it was definitely Chip Brown

1496177123-NS-11redriver62-AJ.jpg

7 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Curry Shoff can watch me fuck his mom in the ass while pouring sugar in his gas tank.

Curry Shoff was merely pointing out the stupidity contained in Max Meyer's SI article, but I guess you can still fuck his mom in the ass while pouring sugar in his gas tank.

Who the fuck is Curry Shoff, who the fuck is Max Meyer, and why should anybody give a fuck about what they think? Why do you post these useless tweets?

Curry Shoff was merely pointing out the stupidity contained in Max Meyer's SI article, but I guess you can still fuck his mom in the ass while pouring sugar in his gas tank.

Yeah, it’s too late. I already finished. Sometimes there is collateral damage in a war. Now I am going throw Max’s cat (we all know he is a cat person) in a wood chipper.
4 minutes ago, Machinator said:

 

We were clearly one of the top 2 best teams in the Big 12 last year and the core of the team is back. At the end of the year we would have also been one of the top 2 teams in the PAC, Big10 and SEC. We will miss a corner and a LB off of last year's team so there may be some growing pains, but with the recruiting the way it has been, I think defense will be about equal to what we saw last year towards the end of the year. On offense, I think we will be better. Our line should be better, our wide receivers are at least as good and overall there is a lot of excellent experience returning. So given that we will have one of the Top 5 offenses in college football and will return a pretty strong defense that won't have many mental lapses, I see improvement from last year's team. Given that our in conference schedule will be easier than last year, I think we will see greater margins of victory and fewer losses overall. Without hiccups, LSU and OU (twice) will be the 3 games that either allow us to compete in the playoffs or send us to a non-playoff bowl game.

8 minutes ago, XYZ said:

Who the fuck is Curry Shoff, who the fuck is Max Meyer, and why should anybody give a fuck about what they think? Why do you post these useless tweets?

Some of us like to have a laugh every now and then. Lighten up, Francis!

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10 minutes ago, XYZ said:

Who the fuck is Curry Shoff, who the fuck is Max Meyer, and why should anybody give a fuck about what they think? Why do you post these useless tweets?

I do it to annoy you.

Not enough attention is given to that fuckwad calling our QB "Shane Ehlinger." He's clearly done his homework on our team. 

1 hour ago, Machinator said:

Dude was probably just looking for a hot take. But I don't think it's unreasonable to see Texas finishing at 8-4 this year, which would put us right on the fringe of being ranked. 

Dude was probably just looking for a hot take. But I don't think it's unreasonable to see Texas finishing at 8-4 this year, which would put us right on the fringe of being ranked. 

We are all shocked that this your take. Shocked.
6 minutes ago, Longhorn_Fan68 said:

I haven't been paying too close attention yet: we gonna have a starting rb on Sat?

Nah. 5 wide on every play. Sam gonna throw for 600 yards. 

6 minutes ago, Longhorn_Fan68 said:

I haven't been paying too close attention yet: we gonna have a starting rb on Sat?

We'll have a fully healthy RB1 and RB2.

Naturally people are panicking.

2 minutes ago, texifornia said:

We'll have a fully healthy RB1 and RB2.

Naturally people are panicking.

this is the kind of information I come to this site for. thank you for your contribution.

1 minute ago, texifornia said:

We'll have a fully healthy RB1 and RB2.

Naturally people are panicking.

Don't forget RB3/QB4 (assuming Saxton is probably a more likely QB3)

We'll have a fully healthy RB1 and RB2.
Naturally people are panicking.

I get your drift, but they are not fully healthy.

Need clarification: who's pouring the sugar into the gas tank? If the fucker were any good at fucking, the fuckee wouldn't have presence of mind to pour accurately, but fucker's quick finish indicates otherwise.

Edited by Tex Long

Need clarification: who's pouring the sugar into the gas tank? If the fucker were any good at fucking, the fuckee wouldn't have presence of mind to pour accurately, but fucker's quick finish indicates otherwise.

You just made the list.
1 minute ago, Patricio Swayze said:


You just made the list.

It gives me no pleasure. Errbody on the list, such a non-exclusive list.

 

22 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Dude was probably just looking for a hot take. But I don't think it's unreasonable to see Texas finishing at 8-4 this year, which would put us right on the fringe of being ranked. 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

23 minutes ago, Patricio Swayze said:

We are all shocked that this your take. Shocked.

LSU, blOU, two of TCU/Iowa State/OK St./Baylor. It's a completely reasonable prediction given the current state of the team. People just get worked up by $9.95-er KoolAid every offseason. 

9 minutes ago, Red Five said:

I get your drift, but they are not fully healthy.

Injury-prone, sure. But it sounds like they're both back to 100%.

LSU, blOU, two of TCU/Iowa State/OK St./Baylor. It's a completely reasonable prediction given the current state of the team. People just get worked up by $9.95-er KoolAid every offseason. 

Does your husband feel the same way?
2 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

Let's be honest, satya saying the floor is still a winning record is a HUGE vote of confidence in this team.

4 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

Injuries, how do they work??  If Texas lost some combo of Sam, Shack, Shark or the top two RBs for extended time this season, it's pretty damn possible.  We won all of three games last year by more than a touchdown.  What a stupid take.. 

Edited by BigBenBamboozle

3 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

I assumed I didn't have to clarify that I wasn't including a bowl game. But sure, 9-4/8-5 depending on what happens then.

satyanash probably predicted Texas to go 9-3 with a Holiday Bowl appearance in 2005.

9 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

How the fuck is Texas finishing the season with an 8-4 record? You squat to pee on this site multiple times a day. There is no fucking way you don’t understand that an 8-4 record this season is impossible. 

If we lose Sam for an extended period, 8-4 is definitely possible 

2 minutes ago, Machinator said:

satyanash probably predicted Texas to go 9-3 with a Holiday Bowl appearance in 2005.

It's not unreasonably, the 2004 team needed a last second field goal to beat a slow Big 10 team.  To much sunshine being pumped prior to 2005.  Our QB has only had one decent year.... /satyanashin2004...probably. 

5 minutes ago, BigBenBamboozle said:

Injuries, how do they work??  If Texas lost some combo of Sam, Shack, Shark or the top two RBs for extended time this season, it's pretty damn possible.  We won all of three games last year by more than a touchdown.  What a stupid take.. 

The premise was based around a final top 25 ranking. The laughably stupid take is yours, piling on top of sarvanaash’s initial handwringing dipshittery. 

5 minutes ago, satyanash said:

I assumed I didn't have to clarify that I wasn't including a bowl game. But sure, 9-4/8-5 depending on what happens then.

I’m sorry for you that basic reading skills are required to converse capably here. Context clues are indeed required. A team cannot finish a winning season with only 12 events on their record unless it faced a bowl ban (Missouri) or a natural disaster. So the premise of 8-4, while attempting to address the concept of “Texas finishes unranked”, is fucking idiotic bandwidth drain. 

3 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

If we lose Sam for an extended period, 8-4 is definitely possible 

No, it isn’t. 

8 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

If we lose Sam for an extended period, 8-4 is definitely possible 

Aren't you a card-carrying member of the Casey Thompson fan club?

No, it isn’t. 

Now we just need Greenspoint to come by with one of his hot takes to complete the bitch ass trifecta.
22 minutes ago, satyanash said:

LSU, blOU, two of TCU/Iowa State/OK St./Baylor. It's a completely reasonable prediction given the current state of the team. People just get worked up by $9.95-er KoolAid every offseason. 

I appreciate your Stoic approach to this negative visualization so that you're pleasantly surprised, but maybe just shut the fuck up. 

15 minutes ago, 6th Street said:

If we lose Sam for an extended period, 8-4 is definitely possible 

What if we lose Shane?

I bet Satya's ballsack is made of pussy. 

1 minute ago, Sgt Hulk said:

What if we lose Shane?

Unpossible.

27 minutes ago, satyanash said:

LSU, blOU, two of TCU/Iowa State/OK St./Baylor. It's a completely reasonable prediction given the current state of the team. People just get worked up by $9.95-er KoolAid every offseason. 

 

 

Had some of the worst defenses ever, but love that Bedford is still rooting for his alma mater. 

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7 minutes ago, BigBenBamboozle said:

@closetojumping, is a 4-loss season "impossible" with this year's team, in your uninterrupted, eternal wisdom?

Pretty sure he's saying if we go 8-4 we will still be ranked in the top 25. Which the author of that article said we would not be. 

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