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Sorry the thread title sucks, but it's hard to sum this story up in one phrase: 

http://www.mankatofreepress.com/news/local_news/update-husband-arrested-after-wife-found-dead/article_9ef19112-20b1-11e9-ba4b-f392fb84c07c.html

SEARLES — A Searles man reportedly told authorities he gave his ailing wife methamphetamine and they had a “death party” before she died.

The husband said he did not get his wife medical help because she did not want to die in a nursing home, according to criminal charges filed against him.

Debra Lynn Johnson, 69, was found dead inside her Searles home Thursday morning after her husband, Duane Arden Johnson, 58, called 911. Responding authorities reportedly found words spray-painted on the front door, a naked Duane Johnson, several guns and hundreds of rounds of ammunition.

5c4b333503176.image.jpg?resize=1662,1246

Duane Johnson was arrested without incident and was charged Friday with felony counts of theft and receiving stolen property.

He reported just before noon Thursday that his wife was dead in their home in the town of less than 200 people south of New Ulm.

The first Brown County sheriff's deputy on scene observed the words “Death Parde God Hell” written in red spray paint on the front door, according to a court complaint.

Duane Johnson came out naked, yelled that his wife was dead, and ran back inside. The deputy found him in a bathtub and he said he was trying to cleanse little white and black “things” from his skin.

Debra Johnson's body was wrapped in a sheet at the top of the stairs. The body was still warm but there was early rigor mortis in her arms. Duane Johnson said he thought his wife had died at about 8:30 that morning but had waited to make sure she was dead before he called 911.

He told authorities his wife had been in a nursing home and she begged him to take her home to die.

Investigators learned from the New Ulm Medical Center that Debra Johnson had been at a transitional care center but her husband removed her against medical advice. She previously had two heart attacks, had diabetes and high blood pressure. She also reportedly had mental illnesses and was on anti-psychotic medication.

Duane Johnson told authorities he and his wife had a “death party” for the final days of her life. They had been “rocking out” to their favorite song: Quiet Riot's “Metal Health.” They took methamphetamine and she stopped taking her medications, he said.

The man said his wife couldn't eat or drink so he said he used snow to wet her mouth. He said she had convulsions but she wouldn't let him call for help, so he held her to keep her from hurting herself. He said they had sex fewer than two hours before she died and she stopped convulsing and was more at peace.

After she died, he said he washed her and wrapped her in linen “like the Bible told me to do.”

Duane Johnson allegedly told an investigator he had 47 guns, many of which were stolen.

Authorities found four rifles and two shotguns in the house, the charges said. They also reportedly found hundreds of rounds of ammunition of several varieties.

Johnson made his first court appearance late Friday afternoon. Bail was set at $250,000 or $150,000 with conditions. He was still in the Brown County Jail Friday evening.

He has prior convictions for assault and DWI and is on probation for driving after license cancellation. A blood test taken after his DWI arrest in 2014 showed he had used methamphetamine, according to court records.

holy shit that is a hard life 58.  dude looks about 90 in that mug shot. and for the record, that mug shot has to be the leader in the clubhouse for "don't care; had sex" meme

Just now, Doc Reeves said:

Probably should’ve had a better exit strategy 

drugs, sex, and death.  sounds like they had a great exit strategy.

Just now, crash_davis said:

drugs, sex, and death.  sounds like they had a great exit strategy.

Yeah, one of them

best quote.

 

Quote

Duane Johnson told authorities he and his wife had a “death party” for the final days of her life. They had been “rocking out” to their favorite song: Quiet Riot's “Metal Health.” 

 

Can you smell what the rock is cookin?

  • Author
29 minutes ago, Doc Reeves said:

Yeah, one of them

He probably wishes he would have joined her -no meth or metal in jail, feeling cry.

After reading about all of her maladies, I think I will withhold judgement on The Rock.  She's probably in a better place.  I'm not saying he should have done it, but I understand.

Not that I'd want to go out like that exactly, but I'm not spending the end of my life in a shitty nursing home either.

Also, would someone please chop an AU on the orange part of the sweater.  Thanks.

 

8 minutes ago, BottleRocket said:

Also, would someone please chop an AU on the orange part of the sweater.  Thanks.

 

I'm really bored at work.

duane-johnson.jpg

3 hours ago, Rusty Shackelford said:

He said they had sex fewer than two hours before she died

I want it louder, more power...

I'm gonna rock it til it strikes the hour.

31 minutes ago, SuingToGetAMessageBoard? said:

 That dude is 58? 

Well, yeah, but that's 406 in human years.

4 hours ago, gyroprotagonist said:

holy shit that is a hard life 58.  dude looks about 90 in that mug shot. and for the record, that mug shot has to be the leader in the clubhouse for "don't care; had sex" meme

My thoughts exactly...

1 hour ago, Player said:

I want it louder, more power...

I'm gonna rock it til it strikes the hour.

Prezence?

44 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

What .. the FUCK.... Is that?!?

The lead singer for Midnight Oil.

2 hours ago, SuingToGetAMessageBoard? said:

 That dude is 58? 

 

They found six guns and HUNDREDS of rounds of ammo in his house?!?

Everyone is overlooking the most salient point here. Not all old, crazy, white dudes maintain a serviceable amount of ammunition. I now have to rethink the entirety of my zombie-apocalypse resupply plan

They are gonna freak if they ever bust in my house. (and locate ALL of my caches)

12 minutes ago, HornsOverIthaca said:

There are parts of that I wish I hadn't read.

Was it the part about the immediately pre-death sex? 

7 hours ago, Hate said:

After reading about all of her maladies, I think I will withhold judgement on The Rock.  She's probably in a better place.  I'm not saying he should have done it, but I understand.

My dad is putting my mom in "memory care assisted living" next week.  When the day comes, I would rather my wife have a death party for me where we spend a couple of days playing "Young and Dangerous" on loop and taking drugs and making fuck.  

 

1 hour ago, Larry T. Spider said:

IconoclastFloridian

???  No random dudes in the party.  

Couple of pints in on a Thursday night and a feel good story like this has me in my Surly happy place.

You be you Duane.

23 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

My dad is in end of life care with Alzheimer's. If I'm ever diagnosed, I'm selling all my shit, taking one trip to Amsterdam then I'm getting a short term rental in Vegas and hoping to find an Elizabeth Shue for my final coke and Jameson addled days. I would settle for "Amber" who I can certainly meet at the bar in the Wynn.

It might not be the end of life care for everyone, but it works for me.

I would head straight to Cartagena and spend my final days snorting coke off the asses of local mamacitas.

Minor detail, but what in the blue hell would ever compel a man to marry a woman 11 years his senior?

32 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

Minor detail, but what in the blue hell would ever compel a man to marry a woman 11 years his senior?

Not so sure, but I’d be keen to ask soon to be ex- Mrs. Bezos if she’d be willing 

10 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

My dad is putting my mom in "memory care assisted living" next week.  When the day comes, I would rather my wife have a death party for me where we spend a couple of days playing "Young and Dangerous" on loop and taking drugs and making fuck.  

 

Did he say making fuck?

My MIL is in memory care.  Can't talk, does not know anyone, has a broken hip that can't be fixed and the $10/hour staff does the minimal amount of care.  It is a shitty way to go.  

37 minutes ago, Hate said:

Did he say making fuck?

Why yes, yes he did.   Adding that to my oft used phrases immediately.

29 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Why yes, yes he did.   Adding that to my oft used phrases immediately.

 

2 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

Minor detail, but what in the blue hell would ever compel a man to marry a woman 11 years his senior?

1. Hot for teacher

and/or

2. He hoped to become President of France

Edited by clapclapclap

Goddammit. One of these days I will finish the thread before posting.

 

 

Edited by TwiceHorn
Berserker!

Two-times, two-times.

 

 

Edited by TwiceHorn
Berserker!

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