Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

I'll go home to poop for the sake of everybody in the office of our shop having to smell it.

 

Also unless I'm not going to make it, I will poop only at home. Fan, bidet, private is much better than pooping in a stall while 2 or 3 guys do the same a few feet away.

 

Will say music in public restrooms help.

 

  • Replies 1.3k
  • Views 126.7k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Cheeseweasel
    Cheeseweasel

  • I don't own a squatty potty, but I like having my feet raised.  So I always turn my trashcan on it's side when I shit.  Or in hotels I'll use random furniture.  Once I jammed an ottoman in the john so

  • Jack Straw
    Jack Straw

    i Febreze my dog when i'm too lazy to give her a bath

Posted Images

I keep wipes in my desk drawer, so work shitting is no problem.

Sometimes I carry them in my pocket if things are pointed in that direction.

16 minutes ago, huge said:

I keep wipes in my desk drawer, so work shitting is no problem.

Sometimes I carry them in my pocket if things are pointed in that direction.

I spit in the toilet paper, or if i have to sneeze will do that, and WOILA: Charmin wipes on the go.

Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.

Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.

This man...this man is a pro.
Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.


This is my move also. We stay at the Hyatt Regency in Orange County so often, I have my preferred stall in the conference hall.

I thought this was common knowledge????  Hell I use the pool bathroom, during the week, business travelers generally......no one is in the fucking pool.

53 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I’m watching The Dirty Dozen right now for probably the fiftieth time and I just realized that Trini Lopez was in it

I'm watching it too

Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.


Standard operating procedure.
13 hours ago, skipperj said:

Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.

God I love Surly Bevo.

14 hours ago, skipperj said:

Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.

Dammit quit telling everybody.

^^It's like ya hate to get done too quickly.

Edited by El Diablo

For the 2nd time, I used "touch of gray" hair product in my hair tonight. At 46 it's getting out of hand. With black hair I don't want full black, just not the gray dominating like it was.

Just pull those fuckers out like a real man.  Hell, I removed every bit of gray hair in my Baker Grayfield fu manchu this winter, one fucking tweezer pull at a time.

On 5/21/2018 at 9:38 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I’m watching The Dirty Dozen right now for probably the fiftieth time and I just realized that Trini Lopez was in it

My dad went to high school with Trini Lopez.  Crozier Tech in Dallas.  For real.  

You haven't shit until you've done it out in the sticks, leaning back against a tree, telephone pole, your pickup, etc. 
I put step rails on my pickups for this very reason. Wife thinks I put them on there for her benefit. Middle of DFW or 30 miles from town, I'll open the two passenger doors, perch on the perfect height those provide, and assume the fecal position.
You haven't shit until you've done it out in the sticks, leaning back against a tree, telephone pole, your pickup, etc. 


I’ll add: leaning against a dumpster in the 5th Ward in Houston, leaning against a boxcar in a train yard, in an abandoned church (Jesus said it was ok).
On 5/20/2018 at 8:55 PM, Equinox said:

You haven't shit until you've done it out in the sticks, leaning back against a tree, telephone pole, your pickup, etc. 

Try pronghorn hunting in the grasslands. No trees.  You and your hunting partner go toe to toe / lock hands and squat.  The toilet paper exchange is the tricky part. 

Try pronghorn hunting in the grasslands. No trees.  You and your hunting partner go toe to toe / lock hands and squat.  The toilet paper exchange is the tricky part. 


Brokeback Mudbutt?
19 minutes ago, deadshank said:

Try pronghorn hunting in the grasslands. No trees.  You and your hunting partner go toe to toe / lock hands and squat.  The toilet paper exchange is the tricky part. 

It's cool if you say "no homo".

4 minutes ago, troph said:


Cept no one will believe you.

Dammit. STOP GIVING MY SECRETS AWAY, TROPH!

On 5/23/2018 at 3:30 AM, BearSchlong said:

That's a good one. It's the perfect degree of embarrassing. I've done it too btw.

A few years ago one of the guys at work came into the conference room sporting a brand new but horrific dye job.  There was an audible gasp when he entered, it was that bad.

After a bit of murmuring it was obvious his dye job was a point of embarrassment so he says “Hey, we all make mistakes.”  One of the grizzled olds in the room responded with “Yeah, I married mine.”

Once got a boner watching an Amazonian while she was fishing. That woman knew what she was doing.

On 5/23/2018 at 8:00 AM, Underdog said:

It’s “no homo” if there isn’t any eye contact. 

So if they're toe to toe, no eye contact, what the hell are they looking at? nmnd.

On 5/23/2018 at 7:24 AM, deadshank said:

Try pronghorn hunting in the grasslands. No trees.  You and your hunting partner go toe to toe / lock hands and squat.  The toilet paper exchange is the tricky part. 

Buddy of mine took a shit out the side of a duck blind but didn't account for the wader effect.  His dump got caught in the folds and when he pulled his waders up it started between his shoulder blades and ran down his back.  It was really cold so you couldn't smell much with frozen noses. 

We always kept our waders on until we got to a quick-stop for breakfast and coffee.  Once we warmed up in the truck it was unbearable and he figured out what happened.  We made him ride in the bed of the truck back to town.  

1 minute ago, Reagan1k said:

Buddy of mine took a shit out the side of a duck blind but didn't account for the wader effect.  His dump got caught in the folds and when he pulled his waders up it started between his shoulder blades and ran down his back.  It was really cold so you couldn't smell much with frozen noses. 

We always kept our waders on until we got to a quick-stop for breakfast and coffee.  Once we warmed up in the truck it was unbearable and he figured out what happened.  We made him ride in the bed of the truck back to town.  

Is your buddy's name Eddie?

10 hours ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

A few years ago one of the guys at work came into the conference room sporting a brand new but horrific dye job.  There was an audible gasp when he entered, it was that bad.

After a bit of murmuring it was obvious his dye job was a point of embarrassment so he says “Hey, we all make mistakes.”  One of the grizzled olds in the room responded with “Yeah, I married mine.”

When I finally realized the misguided vanity of my efforts, I grew my roots out and got a crewcut.  Poof, I was grey again.

Now it's a nice silver.

What's funny is that many women around my age (45) don't give me a second look but some (small minority) notice the hair and then give me a look like they want to consume me.  Some women are in to that.

Edited by BearSchlong

 I once shat in a hole in the floor on a moving train in India.  So yeah, I'll pretty much shit anywhere.

 

Edited by GhostRider
I suck at grammar

On 5/20/2018 at 8:55 PM, Equinox said:

You haven't shit until you've done it out in the sticks, leaning back against a tree, telephone pole, your pickup, etc. 

Or in a port-o-shitter in Iraq or Afghanistan when it's 120+ outside.

On 5/21/2018 at 6:39 PM, skipperj said:

Sometimes when I’m with my family at a nice hotel, I’ll go down to the lobby shitter for some peace and quiet. Great spot is to find one on the conference room floor when there’s nothing going on yet. It will be gloriously empty and clean.

I was in a nice place in NYC. We stayed out all night and was pretty much out of the next AM. Went into Women's bathroom by mistake. I was sitting there and two old ladies came in. Finally after at least 10 mins of them yaking I said fuck it and walked out of the stall and told them to have a nice day. 

On 5/21/2018 at 1:34 PM, huge said:

 

Not that I require such luxury.  I will shit anywhere anytime.  My bowels comfort, that is what is important.

That's pretty much my shitting philosophy.  You're more likely to get a disease from opening the bathroom door than sitting on the seat.  I'll still wipe it off and lay a layer of tp if I think it needs it.   I also never claim to have visited a state unless I've taken a dump there

I dont know what it is but anytime I walk into an airbnb, nature immediately calls. I'm not picky about locations, fortunately. The other guests dont always appreciate it but I instantly feel at home.

Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk

Along the lines of the hotel lobby...  at malls or shopping areas, the bathrooms at Pottery Barns, Sur La Tables, Williams-Sonomas, etc are usually fairly safe bets.   Not a lot guys in the stores generally do they don't get a ton of traffic.

Edited by Macanudo

I’m 37 and cried when my mom left today after her 4 day visit. Mommas boy 100%. Damn woman was my tball coach. Grew up with an absent father.

2 hours ago, Fudbelty said:

I’m 37 and cried when my mom left today after her 4 day visit. Mommas boy 100%. Damn woman was my tball coach. Grew up with an absent father.

Wow...get a hold of yourself. 

2 hours ago, Fudbelty said:

I’m 37 and cried when my mom left today after her 4 day visit. Mommas boy 100%. Damn woman was my tball coach. Grew up with an absent father.

Ever skipped a football game to watch Twilight?  

On 3/29/2018 at 9:37 PM, Crabshack said:

First time I ever tried to rub one out when I was like 12 I ended up pissing all over myself and the wall next to my bed. 

 

Around the same age I had a wet dream and jizzed all over my dog, who was sleeping with in bed with me, and my stepmother saw the creampied spaniel and laughed at me. 

On 5/21/2018 at 1:41 PM, MNLonghornFUKM said:

I'll go home to poop for the sake of everybody in the office of our shop having to smell it.

 

Also unless I'm not going to make it, I will poop only at home. Fan, bidet, private is much better than pooping in a stall while 2 or 3 guys do the same a few feet away.

 

Will say music in public restrooms help.

 

I used to be like that but after spending weeks on the road in the car I'll shit pretty much anywhere now. 

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.