Jump to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

Surly Horns

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

Featured Replies

9 minutes ago, Fudge Nuggets said:

I worked with a guy that would not drink hot coffee.  He would make coffe the night before and let it sit on his nightstand overnight so he could drink it lukewarm in the morning.

I do not like hot coffee at all, it's impossible to sip without burning your mouth. Just waarm is okay. I usually add an unhealthy amount of creamer so it doesn't matter, but I'll just add ice if it's still too hot.

  • Replies 1.3k
  • Views 126.7k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • Cheeseweasel
    Cheeseweasel

  • I don't own a squatty potty, but I like having my feet raised.  So I always turn my trashcan on it's side when I shit.  Or in hotels I'll use random furniture.  Once I jammed an ottoman in the john so

  • Jack Straw
    Jack Straw

    i Febreze my dog when i'm too lazy to give her a bath

Posted Images

35 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Dammit, same here. I have gotten to the point when it comes on I leave the room.

St.Judes Childrens Hospital commercial for me...

8 minutes ago, Hanrahan said:

I think cold fried chicken is better than hot.

You should be embarrassed about being embarrassed about thinking that.  I wasn’t aware that liking cold fried chicken might bring on ridicule from society.

Just now, BurntOrangeCrush said:

St.Judes Childrens Hospital commercial for me...

Not sure I want to know a person who isn't moved by kids with cancer.

Love coffee but can't drink it cold(Ice coffee? Yuck!), love Tea but can drink it hot or cold.  Nothing wrong with cold pizza, chicken, spaghetti/pasta, burger patties, the rare occasion of leftover steak. 

There's a window of about 15 minutes in which hot/warm coffee is in the drinkable zone. I don't want to burn my mouth, but I also don't want it to be lukewarm. It's terrible at room temp. I don't mind iced coffee so sometimes I just say fuck it and put it over ice. 

Anyone by chance posted that they smell the top of their butt crack to gauge their cleanliness ? Because I googled it and there is no one. Not a single person on the planet that does this. It makes me feel like Im weird. And I fucking love the smell too. Like a strange and exotic chocolate. My wife wanted to call in to the Kidd Kraddick show some years ago and tell them about it on the "Does that make me crazy" part of their show. I absolutely told her she couldnt. 

On 4/21/2018 at 1:49 PM, Spankytoes said:

I have 2 Enya albums, several Beyoncé singles and the Spice Girls greatest hits on my phone. Not a single Willie Nelson song.

I’ve never heard a Willie Nelson song in its entirety. I’m actually not sure if I’ve even heard part of one of his songs other that mama don’t let song. I feel my life is better this way. 

1 hour ago, CooterBrown said:

I’ve never heard a Willie Nelson song in its entirety. I’m actually not sure if I’ve even heard part of one of his songs other that mama don’t let song. I feel my life is better this way. 

you are wrong

17 hours ago, GSU&UT said:

I do not like hot coffee at all, it's impossible to sip without burning your mouth. Just waarm is okay. I usually add an unhealthy amount of creamer so it doesn't matter, but I'll just add ice if it's still too hot.

I don’t like super hot coffee either.  One burn and I can’t taste a thing the rest of the day.  I put enough creamer in my coffee to take the temp down just enough where it’s still hot, but not scorching.  I can easily sip it without burning myself.  My parents were polar opposites.  My dad would put an ice cube in his hot coffee and my mom would serve herself a cup from the coffee maker and then put it in the microwave for 30 seconds.  I used to tell her it was no longer coffee, but lava now.

Every time I start hearing Sarah McLachlin singing and they start showing abused or neglected animals, it gets really dusty in my house.  Damn it!

12 hours ago, UTGrad98 said:

Anyone by chance posted that they smell the top of their butt crack to gauge their cleanliness ? Because I googled it and there is no one. Not a single person on the planet that does this. It makes me feel like Im weird. And I fucking love the smell too. Like a strange and exotic chocolate. My wife wanted to call in to the Kidd Kraddick show some years ago and tell them about it on the "Does that make me crazy" part of their show. I absolutely told her she couldnt. 

Can you please describe the mechanics of this practice?

Are you a gymnast? A giraffe? 

I would pay $5 to watch you do this. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom

13 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

I’ve never heard a Willie Nelson song in its entirety. I’m actually not sure if I’ve even heard part of one of his songs other that mama don’t let song. I feel my life is better this way. 

You should be much more than a little embarrassed about this...

I watch cheerleading when it comes on ESPN, but I have to make sure the blinds facing the street are closed.

I tweeze the stragglers around my eyebrows.

I have to trim my ear hair twice a week. Not the inside of my ears, the exterior.

I have an outty.

I will belt out some Lisa Loeb, I Do, when i'm driving solo.

Top 40 is my preferred music at this stage of my life. I'm almost 40.

It gets dusty when the Star Spangled Banner is played at live events.

Edited by LonghornJones

21 hours ago, BurntOrangeCrush said:

St.Judes Childrens Hospital commercial for me...

Same here.  Now my wife has gotten to donating to them.

room temp pizza and cheese enchiladas better than hot as well

15 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

I’ve never heard a Willie Nelson song in its entirety. I’m actually not sure if I’ve even heard part of one of his songs other that mama don’t let song. I feel my life is better this way. 

I'd rather admit I smell my asscrack like UT98 than this. 

Sometimes I'm so lazy when I masturbate I just shoot into the toilet to avoid the cleanup.

19 minutes ago, UncleCharlie said:

Sometimes I'm so lazy when I masturbate I just shoot into the toilet to avoid the cleanup.

Sitting or standing?

Edited by WhatTheBuck

On 4/25/2018 at 8:23 PM, CooterBrown said:

I’ve never heard a Willie Nelson song in its entirety. I’m actually not sure if I’ve even heard part of one of his songs other that mama don’t let song. I feel my life is better this way. 

You’ve never been to Cooter Brown’s, I can tell. 

3 hours ago, Tailleur17 said:

I kinda like Imagine Dragons. 

 

 

11 minutes ago, mulletpelini said:

One of the first 4 albums I ever bought with my own money was Thriller.

That just reminded me.  I got my 12 free Columbia House records and then never bought another thing from them.  I just threw everything they sent me in the trash after that.  I wonder if I'm on a list somewhere.

47 minutes ago, GhostRider said:

That just reminded me.  I got my 12 free Columbia House records and then never bought another thing from them.  I just threw everything they sent me in the trash after that.  I wonder if I'm on a list somewhere.

I did this multiple times.  Different made up names to the same address.  Did it with BMG (?) too.  Still not sure how they ever thought this was a good money making venture.  

On 4/26/2018 at 1:52 PM, UncleCharlie said:

Sometimes I'm so lazy when I masturbate I just shoot into the toilet to avoid the cleanup.

I just thought that’s how it was done

I remember passing college physics almost 2 decades ago but I'm pretty hopeless with anything involving electricity.  Handyman DYI around anything that buzzes?  Noooo fucking thanks

On 4/28/2018 at 11:36 AM, El Moco said:

I love ABBA.

Holy shitballs, yes. Blare that shit at 11. If you play ABBA and can't get laid proper, that's on you, motherfucker.

On 4/25/2018 at 1:18 PM, Hanrahan said:

I think cold fried chicken is better than hot.

Agreed!

I've never seen an episode of the Sopranos, Mad Men, Game of Thrones, the Wire, Downton Abby, Orange is the New Black, or any of the other popular series (except season 1 of Breaking Bad).  I've been watching episodes of Maude, Alice, One Day at a Time.

9 minutes ago, Lhorn said:

I've never seen an episode of the Sopranos, Mad Men, Game of Thrones, the Wire, Downton Abby, Orange is the New Black, or any of the other popular series (except season 1 of Breaking Bad).  I've been watching episodes of Maude, Alice, One Day at a Time.

This is up there with the guy who wouldn't have sex with a lady because he didn't love her.  What the hell man?  You missed some great TV.  

18 minutes ago, Lhorn said:

I've never seen an episode of the Sopranos, Mad Men, Game of Thrones, the Wire, Downton Abby, Orange is the New Black, or any of the other popular series (except season 1 of Breaking Bad).  I've been watching episodes of Maude, Alice, One Day at a Time.

Kiss my grits.

24 minutes ago, Radical Larry said:

Kiss my grits.

Stow it dingy.

Edited by Lhorn

I’ve shit 14 times today because I made a late night stop at jack in the box for tacos and egg rolls. Thankfully the puke never came even though it threatened most the day.

33 minutes ago, LongestHorn said:

I enjoy Frio beer mixed with fresh pink lemonade.

Definitely capturing the spirit of the thread here. 

I’m thinking, “Why would you drink either?”

You throw down with, “Why can’t I have both?”

Well done, ya pink-beer drinkin’ nut!

5 hours ago, 52-80 said:

I remember passing college physics almost 2 decades ago but I'm pretty hopeless with anything involving electricity.  Handyman DYI around anything that buzzes?  Noooo fucking thanks

What's DYI?

If I am flipping channels and come across any of the Harry Potter movies, I will watch it.

I sharted outside Kirby Lane New Years day in 1998.

Luckily we were seated by one of the windows, so I knocked on the window to tell the GF we had to go.

48 minutes ago, Upgrayedd said:

I like A-1 steak sauce on leftover steak

Dude..  You're better than that.  slice the steak and throw it on some bread for a cold steak sandwich.  Fuck... 

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.