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Featured Replies

4 hours ago, woohorn said:

So anybody win?

Nope. Next jackpot expected to be $1.6 Billion. 

$687,724,000 take home. Not bad. 

I could work with that

 

 

Only 4 people have wins jackpot this year. Shows you how shitty the odds are.

I'd take the payments just to be sure I didn't blow it all on hookers in the first year.

But how much are hookers anyway? Even at $2000 grand a night, you’d still have a ton left over for blow on the annuity. 

I'd take the payments just to be sure I didn't blow it all on hookers in the first year.
"JG Wentworth....877-CASHNOW....."
But how much are hookers anyway? Even at $2000 grand a night, you’d still have a ton left over for blow on the annuity. 

$2000 grand a night seems expensive for a hooker

How much does a high class escort/hooker cost these days? Asking for a friend.

2 minutes ago, Kermit said:

How much does a high class escort/hooker cost these days? Asking for a friend.

I bet you could buy one for about $150k/yr.  


$2000 grand a night seems expensive for a hooker

I remember a comedian saying he loved crack, because it brought the price of pussy down to $5. You could have crack hoes 24 hours a day.

I remember a comedian saying he loved crack, because it brought the price of pussy down to $5. You could have crack hoes 24 hours a day.

I don’t think that’s a very politically correct way of looking at things
  • Author

I would leverage my ass deep in soybean and cocoa futures

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  • Author

But if we are doing this for realz, as the title suggests, I really wonder if my marriage would survive it.  I would have great difficulty in having anyone remotely suggest what, when, and where I was going to be spending my time and money.  Scratching off half of that might be the simplest play.

17 minutes ago, Sbbruin said:

But if we are doing this for realz, as the title suggests, I really wonder if my marriage would survive it.  I would have great difficulty in having anyone remotely suggest what, when, and where I was going to be spending my time and money.  Scratching off half of that might be the simplest play.

Or give yourselves a $1-2 million a year, each,  discretionary spending budget. 

The potential tax bite

(Assumes no reduction in taxable income and no additional local taxes owed)

Element $1.6 billion Mega Millions jackpot $620 million Powerball jackpot
Lump sum option $904 million $354.3 million
24% federal tax withholding less $217 million less $85 million
13% more (diff. bet. 24% and top tax rate of 37%) less $117.5 million less $46 million
State tax of 0% to 8.82% less 0 to $79.7 million less 0 to $31.3 million
After-tax bottom line $489.8 million to $569.5 million $192 million to $223.3 million
 

Is there a helipad near DKR-TMS? If I win $500 million after taxes, I'm prolly gonna skip that I-10 to 71 drive on Saturdays in the fall.

Bernard

as far as i  can tell, there's no state lottery tax in texas. not that it matters with this huge of an amount.

3 hours ago, Bernard said:

Is there a helipad near DKR-TMS? If I win $500 million after taxes, I'm prolly gonna skip that I-10 to 71 drive on Saturdays in the fall.

Bernard

If you're worth half a billion why are you staying in Houston? Or at least driving up earlier and renting a penthouse?

Edited by ShaggyBevo RIP

6 hours ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

If you're worth half a billion why are you staying in Houston?

Forbes 400 includes 11 Houston Billionaires and excludes any poor Billionaires whose net worth falls below $2 Billion. Houston is a great place to live. It’ll be my home base, but my NetJets account will be used like my current Uber account. I won’t be here in August though. Ever.

Bernard

Edited by Bernard

1 hour ago, Bernard said:

Forbes 400 includes 11 Houston Billionaires and excludes any poor Billionaires whose net worth falls below $2 Billion. Houston is a great place to live. It’ll be my home base, but my NetJets account will be used like my current Uber account. I won’t be here in August though. Ever.

Bernard

That's because they're all tied to their businesses, and/or are crusty old fucks lounging in their AC'ed estate or cadillac anyway

1 hour ago, Bernard said:

Forbes 400 includes 11 Houston Billionaires and excludes any poor Billionaires whose net worth falls below $2 Billion. Houston is a great place to live. It’ll be my home base, but my NetJets account will be used like my current Uber account. I won’t be here in August though. Ever.

Bernard

should I win, there is ZERO chance I'm staying anywhere near Houston.  The summers suck ass and there are better places to winter...

fuck hurricanes.  Fuck two showers a day. Fuck 8 month long sauna bullshit.  Fuck traffic.  Fuck the massive insecurity complex.

Question for you lottery buffs, from Friday's draw.  I will check at lottery station after work, but do matching any of these numbers mean I get some small winnings?  Like a couple bucks?Matching numbers bolded.

Winning Numbers:  15-23-53-65-70-*07

My Numbers: 05-15-16-49-67-*07

I matched the PB, or whatever the 07 is.

11 minutes ago, ernest_t_bass said:

Question for you lottery buffs, from Friday's draw.  I will check at lottery station after work, but do matching any of these numbers mean I get some small winnings?  Like a couple bucks?Matching numbers bolded.

Winning Numbers:  15-23-53-65-70-*07

My Numbers: 05-15-16-49-67-*07

I matched the PB, or whatever the 07 is.

See the source image

3 hours ago, slorch said:

should I win, there is ZERO chance I'm staying anywhere near Houston.  The summers suck ass and there are better places to winter...

fuck hurricanes.  Fuck two showers a day. Fuck 8 month long sauna bullshit.  Fuck traffic.  Fuck the massive insecurity complex.

but Cyclone Anayas tho

21 minutes ago, ernest_t_bass said:

Sweet.  $4 for me.  Thanks.

consider the chances that as a consequence of the big bang, an environment such as Earth was born; and as a consequence of a much smaller bang with about a million little sperms, you were born... the odds of winning the Jackpot aint that bad

13 hours ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

If you're worth half a billion why are you staying in Houston? Or at least driving up earlier and renting a penthouse?

TemptingFrigidDeer-size_restricted.gif

7 hours ago, Bernard said:

Forbes 400 includes 11 Houston Billionaires and excludes any poor Billionaires whose net worth falls below $2 Billion. Houston is a great place to live. It’ll be my home base, but my NetJets account will be used like my current Uber account. I won’t be here in August though. Ever.

Bernard

Do you run an oil and gas corporation or own a Houston pro sports team?

Edited by ShaggyBevo RIP

Anything i want. Probably try and buy a well established vineyard in Napa that is cash flow positive, buy that, live there most summers, and not fuck it up.  Keep Houston as home base.  It much else really. Start a foundation that helps homless vets with mental health, hunger and housing, and possibly job post combat/ptsd.  Something like that. 

Bought some tickets for first time in about  ten years. I went ahead and quit my job. 

Not sure what I’m gonna do with all the money yet 

I can’t imagine the hassle that would come with a jackpot that big. I’d seriously consider giving all but about 20M away. That would be fun.

On 10/23/2018 at 3:10 AM, Bernard said:

Forbes 400 includes 11 Houston Billionaires and excludes any poor Billionaires whose net worth falls below $2 Billion. Houston is a great place to live. It’ll be my home base, but my NetJets account will be used like my current Uber account. I won’t be here in August though. Ever.

Bernard

are you not fat yet?

ONE ticket winner.   holy shit.....     congrats to the South Carolinian who can take the lump sum and buy a NHL hockey team.

24 minutes ago, AUS-97HORN said:

ONE ticket winner.   holy shit.....     congrats to the South Carolinian who can take the lump sum and buy a NHL hockey team.

Unless the ticket was bought by a group of people, maybe coworkers.

31 minutes ago, AUS-97HORN said:

ONE ticket winner.   holy shit.....     congrats to the South Carolinian who can take the lump sum and buy a NHL hockey teamhis / her home state.

Fixt

3 minutes ago, ernest_t_bass said:

Anyone win Powerball?

I did, but my lawyer said to keep it on the down low so don't tell anyone.

If you got $500M free and clear you could afford to give $1M to every American and still have generational money in the bank. Imagine that little social experiment.

1 minute ago, Buzzrock said:

If you got $500M free and clear you could afford to give $1M to every American and still have generational money in the bank. Imagine that little social experiment.

I don't think math is your strong suit...

1 minute ago, Buzzrock said:

If you got $500M free and clear you could afford to give $1M to every American and still have generational money in the bank. Imagine that little social experiment.

wedding-crashers-wtf.gif

Could you go ahead and put that on a color/swirly background and load that up on the ol' facebook? Thx.

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