Everything posted by TexasBeta
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Official 2021 Bitch about family/Holiday Insanity
For your entertainment, I copied from a previous Holiday board - ORIGINALLY POSTED by WIDE-E-WIDE Dec 2006 Its been 12 years, but damn its still funny. After much deliberation, I will reluctantly tell the story of my family touring the Christmas lights in Waco last week. My wife told me about this thing at the beginning of December. To be honest I had forgotten all about it until the night before. I did not want to go. Call me a scrooge but riding around looking at electricity captured in colored bulbs is not my idea of entertainment. However, the kids were looking forward to it and apparently at some point I had agreed to do it. This little tour got us for 6 bucks a head. My wife, her parents, our 4 kids and I all went. Now I wasn’t a math major but that's $48 to ride around in a trolley and look at lights. WTF? (I found this out the day of) So we drive all the way the hell to downtown Waco and sit and wait for this trolley to take us on the tour. They’ve got a tree, Santa, hot cocoa- All that shit. Finally all the trolleys roll up and Shaquandra our official Christmas lights tour guide hops out and says “Y’all going to look at the lights?....(pause) Okay den let’s get our roll on!” My initial gripe is that the bitch is driving at mach speed and you can’t see shit but a blurry-ass Santa and the occasional Wal-Mart $9.99 wire light-up reindeer. My father-in-law asks if she could slow down a bit so that we could take pictures and appreciate the lights a little more..(his words not mine). By this time I’ve already leaned over and whispered in my wife’s ear “$48 for this shit?” She gives me the obligatory elbow and “stop being like that” We roll along for about 15 minutes looking at every tacky piece of shit overkill light extravaganza in East Waco. Suddenly we get on the highway and start heading to the other side of town. We ride for a good 12-15 minutes without seeing a single damn house decorated. So I lean over to the wife again and say “umm where the hell are we going?” Elbow “shut up” and all that again. Shaquandra has Mariah Carey’s Christmas cd blasting and we just getting our roll on...and then it happened. Signs and streets started to look really familiar. My oldest daughter says “hey there’s HEB.” As in the HEB right down the road from our house (approx. 1/2 mile) I lean over to the wife again “This bitch better not turn right at this light!” What does the driver do????? That’s right folks, fucking turns right and heads right to our neighborhood. Not only our neighborhood “BUT OUR FUCKING STREET!! I am just at a loss for words by this point. I cannot believe this is happening. Street after street, house after house for a good 30 minutes. The driver is going on and on about “oooh like over thurr- look at the Santa up on the roof kids.” I know bitch “I'M THE ONE THAT FUCKING PUT HIS FAT ASS UP THERE LAST WEEK" I can’t type this anymore it's just too painful. The point is, we spent almost $50 to look at the Christmas lights in our own damn neighborhood. My wife just hung her head in shame. I’ll be in charge of Christmas spirit next year thank you very much.
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Texas Recruiting Notes 2022 - Idiotic Slapfights Unrelated To 2022 Recruiting
These sheep humping farmers aren’t messing around…. Unlike us Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Denis Villeneuve's Dune
I wanted to see them handle how the guild folds space. The original was really bad…. Maybe the next one. I really enjoyed it. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Texas Recruiting Notes 2022 - Idiotic Slapfights Unrelated To 2022 Recruiting
You forgot to add all the pussy that crusty old dyke can lick. She can’t get out soon enough. Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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UT buys Dobie Center
I remember kidding her about the no public restroom sign on her door. She went on a 10 min tirade about the soccer families over at Murchison on weekends and them using her bathroom. I ate there once a week for years. Same thing. Just talked in, grabbed a table and she brought I wanted. I miss her.
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[Game Thread] Texas vs. OkSU - 11am on FOX
I saw it. He looked beaten.
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FIRE SOMEBODY
A decade? You're being kind. With the exception of a few years under Brown it's been 40 plus years. Maybe less. For sure started in 1983 at cotton Bowl vs Georgia.
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Texas Football 2021 In-Season Thread: Can we get a redo?
Well. We did try a defensive coordinator to run the team. It's only fair to give the other side of the ball a shot. Right? Sigh.
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[Game Thread] Texas vs. OkSU - 11am on FOX
Watching LHN. Sark has the million mile stare. I've seen same on Herman and Strong. In his defense he did say he's 100% to.blame.as opposed to the turtle.
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Alabama at Texas Agricultural & Mechanical University - 7pm on CBS
lol Stupid farmers
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Alabama at Texas Agricultural & Mechanical University - 7pm on CBS
Thank you !
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Alabama at Texas Agricultural & Mechanical University - 7pm on CBS
A stream would be great. Have a heart. I'm having to listen to the game on the aggy network. I feel less intelligent with every passing minute.
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2021 TX/OU MS Paint - Gif - Meme Thread of Dominance
- 2021 TX/OU MS Paint - Gif - Meme Thread of Dominance
- klanaggy pirate @ soldier texums :: 6pm SECN
Beautiful!!! Stupid farmers.- It’s Britney Bitch
Will she be unclothed and photographed during these bad decisions?…… asking for a friend.- Texas Recruiting Notes 2022 - Idiotic Slapfights Unrelated To 2022 Recruiting
I agree. I'm sure he's a great talent but I see this and think quitter.- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
Yes... I saw that play... he is the poster child for aggy - get your ass handed to you... then act like an ass when you do your job.- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
I’m sorry but I’m going to need some more texasags while I wait for the OU loss.- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
From TexAgs. “I understand the whole morale thing and pumping up your team but you've flat out lied to us all in your pressers. This is nothing like what you say the team is like” Yes!! Yes!! Suck it chin pubs.- Jimbo 2022: Balls To The Face
I’m confused. I thought that hobbit was an offensive genius. Suck it aggy.- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
F. Aggy- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
Whose the backup QB for Arky and can he beat aggy?- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
and now for a quick trip over to SECRANT to lower my IQ- Arky vs aggy Saturday, Sept 25th 2:30pm CT CBS
Oh good... fake army band is on.. plus a quick lick of Jerry Jones.. why not just tell my kids there is no Santa to complete the shit. - 2021 TX/OU MS Paint - Gif - Meme Thread of Dominance
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