Everything posted by Bama Llama
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My weekend at The Swamp 2025
That, my friends, is 21st Century gonzo literature. Thank you, Imma, for expending the time, energy and capital to make it possible for me to read of your adventures in Pettyland.
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Who should be our next OC hire?
Do not even think about Ryan Grubb but Hugh Freeze may be available soon.
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ESPN GAME DAY
Should be an interesting trajectory
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Jeffrey Epstein needs his own thread
Yeah, and Corch Sandusky was just “horsing around” with Penn State football players in the showers at Happy Valley.
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2025 Game Week 5: Texas at Florida
Thanks. That’s three “dreaded” blackout Bama wins in a row. The horns will win there, too, later on in the season. UGA fans are insufferable, just like the office dweeb woofing at his boss lady in the commercial.
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2025 Game Week 5: Texas at Florida
Texas, just win, avoid key injuries and move on. Fuck style points.
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Tell me about ou
You guys better get into and out of the Swamp without key injured players.”before interring OU. Weird shit happens in that place. I have no doubt Bendables will play Mateer but he (Mateer) didn’t impress me that much vs a pretty solid Alldumb defense. Florida’s locker room may be on life support by Saturday, in any case. Hook ‘em anyway.
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Alabama Football - Now Featuring Kalen DeBoer
To open the 2002 game in Fayetteville, Arkansas kicked the football out of the back of the end zone. On the first play from scrimmage, “Shaudie” took a draw play 80 yards to the house, untouched. Pound for pound, that guy was one the best college football players I ever saw. Tough, fast, sure handed. His tearful argument to keep Mike Price was eloquent but the die had been cast. I’ll remember Shaud when our defense tries to handle Mike Shula’s offense at South Carolina in a few weeks.
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Alabama Football - Now Featuring Kalen DeBoer
His stripper companions literally ordered two of everything on the room service breakfast menu, using his UA credit card.
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Alabama Football - Now Featuring Kalen DeBoer
My daughter was a freshman at UA during the brief Price “era.” He had a habit of turning up semi-hammered at the coded gate of his on campus condominium at the same time as coveys of lithe, nubile coeds coming in from bar crawling, asking if they could punch the code to open the gate to the elevator because he had forgotten what day it was. My daughter was not one of the coeds and no pics, you sick fucks. The players LOVED Mike Price and lobbied the AD to keep him even after the Pensacola strippers incident. Shades lof Hugh Freeze!
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UGA- Bama 7:30 on ABC
As W would tell us, there good strategery in taking 3 points when you can get it and for punting the ball when you don’t want to turn it to your opponent on downs. Just ask DKR, Bobby Dodd, Bud Wilkinson, Ara Pargehian, Robert Neyland and Paul Bryant. I saw Bryant punt or quick-kick on third and long plenty of times. It helps if your defense can tackle in the open field! His 1961 NC team gave up 25 points . . . all year!
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Auburn at A&M - 2:30 on ESPN
Jaysus, Mary and Joseph
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Auburn at A&M - 2:30 on ESPN
Jesse and Tess are like an infomercial And Tess is playing the dummy
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Auburn at A&M - 2:30 on ESPN
That Bouchard (Gomer Pyle) ref loves to shit on good plays
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Auburn at A&M - 2:30 on ESPN
We copyrighted “Auburn sucks so fucking bad” in 1948 when they were known as “API.” That year the score was 55-0 Bama. Auburn was the place that inspired the Star Wars writer to come up with “Hive of scum and villainy.” Alabama Polytechnic Institute Hee Haw!
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Auburn at A&M - 2:30 on ESPN
This game reminds me of how Lewis Grizzard used to describe Big 10 football in the 60s and 70s: “Two mules fighting over a turnip.”
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CFB Week Five Preview: Ain't No Lie, Baby, Bye Bye Bye
WKU mascot was last seen in 1987 in the shittiest ever version of Zelda (Zelda II) as a hopping gumdrop.
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Trump’s America
He is the Lazai Lama, the Enemy of Enlightenment. If he doesn’t deploy nukes to distract watchers from Epstein Gate, we’ll be lucky. Motherfuck him and all who voted for him.
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Trump’s America
The logical conclusion of Trumpuffery
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Auburn @ Oklahoma
Speaking of Auburn, Pat Dye said, “Hindsight’s 50/50.”
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This is a man. He's over 40. He's a man.
Your way reads better as an alliterative line, yes indeed. My F-I-L never missed a chance to use the word “ass” even if “butt” would sound better. For example, he would say “signed, sealed and delivered ASS” when theorizing about a rigged bout he booked that ended up costing him $$.
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This is a man. He's over 40. He's a man.
Good one, Kahuna Horn. In my dotage (74) and since Bama’s off this week, I was reflecting on autumn Saturday mornings at my in-laws circa 1970-2000, which were joyfully entertaining. Never been a morning drinker, but there’s a first time for everything. Good luck tonight over the Shoustons.
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This is a man. He's over 40. He's a man.
My father-in-law, as great a man who ever lived and a most frank and candid son of the depression, had a way with words. He also held the occasional wager on college football games. On autumn Saturday mornings his kitchen table in Tuscaloosa, upon which the line sheets were spread, was like the set of The Sting. During the desert wandering years before Saban, Alabama once had a QB2 who was a baseball pitcher. QB1 went down to a knee injury, and the pitcher started a few games. I believe we lost them all. Dad’s customers continued to bet Bama anyway, every week. He would jack up the line, pretending it had shifted. If the actual line was Bama -6, he would “adjust” the 6 to 10 or 11 and make a few extra bucks each weekend. He knew he was safe because of the baseball QB, who was a decent athlete but a shitty passer. “That boy couldn’t hit a bull in the ass with a bass fiddle.” Dad would have a heyday with this SEC.
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RIP Robert Redford
Welp, Surly brothers and sisters, this is one of those mile marker and signpost passings, makes me think of mortality, of aging. I, for one, am growing tired of being reminded. Grampaw Lllama made it to 89, which seemed ancient to me then. Redford did things with style and flair and confidence, elevating every project he touched. As someone posted above, if you see that a Redford film is on, you’ll probably watch it and enjoy the fuck out of it. If only our teams’ corches could coach as well as that dude could act!
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RIP Robert Redford
Young Bob made it possible for Mrs Llama to achieve at least half of her quality orgasms back in the day (indirectly). I particularly liked Three Days of the Condor. Never felt at ease around postmen after that one.