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SamMan

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Everything posted by SamMan

  1. I have many questions about this picture, much less this hire. I’ll start with this: is that gloved hand sneaking up behind him Ronald McDonald with a job offer? My first guess was khat. Then again, I have no idea why a man employed by an NFL team would be chewing a controlled substance, used primarily in the Middle East and Sub-Saharan Africa, while flipping burgers in the common area of a suburban apartment complex. This entire saga is quite confusing. Was the “Sark’s got his man” reporting this guy or was it Rod and he hadn’t accepted? My point all along when people were handwringing about Rod and Frank was that you could do much worse than either of those men. I’m impressed and stunned at how, among the multitude of supposed plugged-in Texas Football media wonks, we were given other names like Rocker, Hurtt, Nielsen, the Tech DL coach, Ed O, and not a goddamn one of them even mentioned this dude. Oh well, we’ll see. I’m pretty neutral about it, but I’ll still advocate for Frank to return to the program in some capacity in the future. P.S. The Choice comparison is grade A delusional bullshit. Wait, you mean you were questioning the bona fides of…BO DAVIS??? That résumé was sketchy as fuck spending so much time with the greatest program builder/defensive mastermind of all time. Or was it Diaz, who spent most of his time with noted program builder, Bobby Bowden, and his defensive gurus, Mickey Andrews, and Chuck Amato, but did work for offensively-minded Bowden acolyte, Rick Stockstill? Was it those 25 days of Gray? Surely you aren’t referencing the late Greg Robinson in his pinch-hitter role post-Diaz.
  2. The real question is: does Texas DL coach = Texas LB coach?
  3. Totally. Hiring a guy who was drafted by Nick Saban, coached by Dan Quinn, worked under Bo Davis for three years, has eight years of experience coaching the position in college, has recruited the state of Texas extensively, most recently coached in college at the University of Miami, is currently on staff in the NFL for a team that played exceptional defense this year, and happens to be a former all-American DT at UT…is too big of a risk.
  4. I was in the third row for that game. Both Rod’s scoop + score and Jamaal’s TD run were toward the same end zone. It was hilarious how much longer it took Rod to cover essentially the same ground. I loved it. That and Chris Whaley’s interception for a TD are high on my list of OU plays. Aaron Williams’ ridiculous INT on the sideline was great, too. This has something to do with @texifornia posting so many standalone tweets yesterday, doesn’t it?? If Bobby can’t stomach the Manscaped reads, I’m not sure what he’ll make of us degenerates laying siege to his new site…but I’m pleased to see this anyway.
  5. TIL that it took Sark 3-4 years to start adding quality players via the portal. I guess those two top 10 portal recruits (including the starting QB) after year one don’t count..and neither does that starting CB. I suppose it takes 20+ transfers per cycle for it to even register with them (this coming exactly two short years after the greatest HS recruiting class ever enrolled, mind you). I also love Captain Hindsight pointing out that the “perfect setup” would have been for TEXAS to remain in the soft Big 12, so they’d have a shot at an automatic CFP bid…this message brought to you by the team that hasn’t even competed for a conference championship since the Clinton administration. Thanks ags—who knew virgins were the best source for sex advice?? ———— The ideal Texas Travesty headline. Throw in a photo of an aggie (wearing a “Don’t care. Got Jimbo.” shirt, naturally) praying at the alter of the blank National Championship plaque in the empty Hall of Champions. Maybe add an inset of a divorce decree showing $77.6 million payable to Jimbo, a nice picture of Mark Stoops with an enormous ❌, and a photo of fat fuck Melk sawing ‘em off in that ill-fitting suit he bought off the rack at Ross Dress for Less, with a shrug emoji. Surly Bonus Subtitle: SHIT’S BJORKED!
  6. Wasn’t he committed to them for a long time before flipping on signing day? Or if you had (future NFL kicker) Nick Rose kicking PATs.
  7. Not to derail, but this is quite possibly one of the greatest stolen scenes in the history of motion pictures. It was practically impossible to outshine Eddie Murphy, but Serge did it.
  8. Speaking of Mia Khalifa and tight ends…
  9. You: The SEC is super strong and tough, it’s a gauntlet, NFL dudes everywhere. Jefferson in the SEC: Also you: Taylen Green is WAY better than KJ Jefferson. Green in the WAC: Please try to use your brain a bit more before making declarative statements that are entirely ignorant of the facts.
  10. Have you followed football, or sports in general over the past, say, 40 years? Off the top of my head, you can ask guys like Bill Belichick, Todd Graham, Kliff Kingsbury, Jerry Gray (I think), Tashard Choice, Chris Beard, etc. It happens. The simplest answer is you resign. These men are not chattel. They are free to move. Belichick did it on a napkin…which sounds like a euphemism for something much dirtier.
  11. What the fuck does Tech’s new basketball coach have to do with football??
  12. Saban is the GOAT, but Texas wins if Colt isn’t injured. You’ll never convince me otherwise.
  13. While you are hoping—his son is in the Rangers system (very dumb draft pick, imo). It’s possible he could play in Round Rock at some point, but he’s perpetually injured. It seems like this board might not be a great fit for a man of your disposition. I knew Frank when I was in school. I thought he was one of the best dudes on the team back then. Very bright and personable. I have no clue how great he is as a position coach/recruiter, but I wouldn’t mind seeing him back at Texas in some capacity (Rod, too). Seems like Toledo was more of a stopgap after he was let go by Vegas in February and accepted the position in June. Maybe Dan Quinn would leave the Cowboys (and every HC position he is being considered for) to be Sark’s DL coach.
  14. Kid reminds me of Jakeem Grant. He put up 200 yds on 6 total touches vs Texas his senior year.
  15. Aggie logic: LaJohntay is just doing surreptitious recon for Herman to gather dirt on Cheater Sark for making him look so incompetent.
  16. Ewers has always resembled early era Brian Wilson (another HS QB) to me. But you might be on to something:
  17. Saban after the game:
  18. God herself penned an intellectually-dubious opus on this very subject…
  19. Welcome, Aaron. RIP Kobe. I hope Butler’s play helps me develop a newer, better frame of reference for the city of Calabasas. @Chopper is already making considerable headway in that department. Hook ‘em.
  20. And a very Merry Christmas to you, Mr. Scrooge! I see our resident pedant, @Napoleon, is running a bit behind, so I’ll fill in…*role.
  21. I swear she and her son were both characters on MTV’s underrated animated sitcom, Daria:
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